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Old 04-25-2013, 08:43 AM   #21
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This site gave me motivation to get out early, or at least try to. Also, in my industry (fin'l services, not sales related), not many people make it to the 60s.
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Old 04-25-2013, 08:50 AM   #22
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My sister went through a horse phase when her daughters were young and I was astounded at the total costs associated with horse ownership. It made a large power boat or a small plane look thrifty.

I guess you need to decide if you will be working longer to support your wife's spending and how you each feel about that.
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Old 04-25-2013, 08:52 AM   #23
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Lots of good information, but this site has destroyed any illusions that I may have had about doing better than average in my retirement financial planning.
I joined this board at the end of 2008. Now that was a depressing time for most. Our pile of investments declined over 20%. I read this board for inspiration, and it really helped. There is not a focus just on how much the market goes up and down. People discuss their freedom to do whatever.

Follow threads that are inspiring and educational. You and I may not retire at 62, but we know a whole lot more about the experience now because we read what others post.
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Old 04-25-2013, 08:53 AM   #24
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How fast can those horses run?
You might be closer than you think!

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Old 04-25-2013, 09:08 AM   #25
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I think you are doing fine and your goals are good . I think you will be ahead of most of your peers by far.

Our goal is retire i 3 years (I will be 60 and DW 65). We are happy with that. I too get a little down when I see a lot of folks pulling the plug a t 40, 45 50 and so on. Sometime I wonder if that means they are going to do something for income they really like? As compared to doing nothing to generate income (just enjoying/volunteering and such)

Who knows. In the end it has to work for you.
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Old 04-25-2013, 10:27 AM   #26
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I think you are doing well! My own brother who is a high earner is saving virtually nothing despite my 'encouragement' so this is not easy to do!
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Old 04-26-2013, 01:56 PM   #27
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Lots of good information, but this site has destroyed any illusions that I may have had about doing better than average in my retirement financial planning.

I used to pat myself on the back for putting 15%+ away each year, but on this site it seems like most sock away 25% +.....there is just no way to do that on just over $100,000 a year, with a wife that likes horses, among other things.

I also used to think that getting out at 62, maybe 60, with money to live at or above my current means was great, but then I read all these posts from 30 somethings that will be retired long before I am (49 at present).

Guess I am just jealous:-) I just need to save those articles that are periodically published showing how much the AVERAGE 50 year old has saved for retirement, to remind myself that I am doing OK.
Ha! I know how you feel. I'm just an average Joe , but I will semi-retire when I get into my mid-50s and fully retire in my 60s. I'll eat beans and rice and cut out crap I don't need to live if I have to. BTW, appreciate what you have.
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Old 04-26-2013, 01:58 PM   #28
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Originally Posted by Sniggle View Post
Lots of good information, but this site has destroyed any illusions that I may have had about doing better than average in my retirement financial planning.

I used to pat myself on the back for putting 15%+ away each year, but on this site it seems like most sock away 25% +.....there is just no way to do that on just over $100,000 a year, with a wife that likes horses, among other things.

I also used to think that getting out at 62, maybe 60, with money to live at or above my current means was great, but then I read all these posts from 30 somethings that will be retired long before I am (49 at present).

Guess I am just jealous:-) I just need to save those articles that are periodically published showing how much the AVERAGE 50 year old has saved for retirement, to remind myself that I am doing OK.
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Originally Posted by travelover View Post
My sister went through a horse phase when her daughters were young and I was astounded at the total costs associated with horse ownership. It made a large power boat or a small plane look thrifty.

I guess you need to decide if you will be working longer to support your wife's spending and how you each feel about that.
That's crazy.
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Old 04-26-2013, 02:12 PM   #29
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I used to pat myself on the back for putting 15%+ away each year, but on this site it seems like most sock away 25% +.....there is just no way to do that on just over $100,000 a year, with a wife that likes horses, among other things.
If you are saving at all you are ahead of most folks! and 15% is a good number. Remember this is an ER forum with a small number or ER/investing/frugality nerds......we are NOT NORMAL. and in fact neither are you, that 15% makes you pretty special.

Controlling spending is important, but you have to balance that against quality of life. Have you considered downsizing......instead of horses what about Shetland ponies
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Old 04-26-2013, 02:16 PM   #30
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I agree with others that most who frequent this forum are outliers and that 15% is a good savings rate at your income level. I think the bigger problem for you is those darn hayburners - outrageously expensive hobby.
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Old 04-26-2013, 02:36 PM   #31
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Now now now, feeling better?
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Old 04-26-2013, 02:49 PM   #32
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Yes, I believe I am.

I am still chuckling about the suggestion from someone to downsize the horses to shetland ponies....too funny.

All my worry may be for nothing....as this weekend I agreed to join my wife on a competitive trail ride which could possibly result in her receiving a life insurance windfall
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Old 04-26-2013, 07:01 PM   #33
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No need to be jealous. Many of us have delayed gratification for decades. Keep healthy, enjoy happy family relationships, do something you like for your job, and you will be far ahead.
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Originally Posted by Sniggle View Post

Guess I am just jealous:-) I just need to save those articles that are periodically published showing how much the AVERAGE 50 year old has saved for retirement, to remind myself that I am doing OK.
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Old 04-26-2013, 08:00 PM   #34
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Ha, I alternate between depression and inspiration depending on my mood but to be serious this place is ultimately a great motivator for me. I thought I was doing fairly well just plodding along when I compared myself to my peers/family etc. but finding ER.org and BH really opened my eyes before it was too late. Coming here helps keep me focused on the goal and that definitely outweighs my occasional feeling of being a slacker.
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Old 04-27-2013, 02:30 AM   #35
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Slow and steady really does win the race. Keep plugging along. It WILL get there.
I wish I had found this site at age 49; I could have prepared for ER in a much more enlightened manner. Instead, I was working like a maniac, helping DH raise a son with a brain disorder, and just cramming 401K contributions into the MM fund (after 2008) because I had no time to research better options offered there. This site would have educated and inspired me, plus offered practical direction.

So, I hope the OP does not get discouraged. He can plan and save, while benefiting from the collective wisdom here.
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Old 04-27-2013, 04:34 AM   #36
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One of the best pieces of advice I received from my father, my high school football coach, and my first boss at Megacorp (they never knew each other but thought along the same lines) was this: "always have a good number of (of course not exclusively) friends and acquaintances who have accomplished more or done better than you have. Do not be jealous of them, but see what you can learn from them and apply towards your life to achieve a similar goal".

I have found that to be invaluable. Maybe I haven't achieved everything that others have, but it has moved me much closer to those goals than if I had not followed that advice.

That is how I look at this forum - folks have achieved ER, which I hope to. So I am happy for them, and look to learn something from their situation that I can apply to my life to help move me closer to that goal. So it is a privilege for me to learn from what others who are doing better have to offer.
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Old 04-27-2013, 05:22 AM   #37
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Remember this is an ER forum with a small number or ER/investing/frugality nerds......we are NOT NORMAL. and in fact neither are you, that 15% makes you pretty special.
Indeed. As in Lake Wobegon the people here are all above average so they set a higher bar than most.
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Old 04-27-2013, 06:08 PM   #38
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I think I've got over the jealousy thing. My eyes were opened by a couple of unrelated meetings that happened to me about 25 years ago. This was when I had just had my first promotion and was no longer an entry level engineer. I couldn't afford everything I wanted but I could afford everything I needed.

The first meeting was a class on Sunday at our church. One of the young couples was asking for advice. The muffler had fallen out of their old car and they couldn't afford to replace it. They were asking for advice on cheap ways to keep it driveable until their next paycheck. We all offered to help and ended up taking up a collection to tide them over. Secretly, I was feeling pretty good that I wasn't in their shoes. I remember commenting to my spouse later that "we aren't rich but I'm glad that something like that wouldn't be a crisis for us."

The next day I had a 7:30 AM meeting with a guy who was about 4 levels above me in the megacorp and who I new had a salary that was 10-20X mine. He was on the phone as I knocked on the door and finishing up his conversation as I walked in. I overheard him say that he'd been at a board meeting and it sure was interesting seeing how the "other half" lived. This struck me because I considered him to be in "the other half."

Since then, I've met many people who are multi-millionares. None of them considered themselves "rich." All of them "knew someone who was rich."

My conclusion from a lot of these discussions with people at all stations of life is that it doesn't matter how much you have. Unless you are one of the top 5 on Forbes richest list, there is going to be someone else who has more of something that you would like to have. If you're the jealous type, you're always going to be able to find someone to envy.

My personal key to happiness is to decide what I want in life without looking over my shoulder at others. Then decide if it is worth going after and if it is, work to get it. There is a lot of satisfaction to achieving a goal that doesn't need to be tied to being better than someone else.
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Old 04-27-2013, 07:53 PM   #39
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My personal key to happiness is to decide what I want in life without looking over my shoulder at others. Then decide if it is worth going after and if it is, work to get it. There is a lot of satisfaction to achieving a goal that doesn't need to be tied to being better than someone else.
Wanting nothing is the key. I try to want nothing, but so far I've always failed.
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Old 04-27-2013, 08:08 PM   #40
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One of the best pieces of advice I received ... was this: "always have a good number of (of course not exclusively) friends and acquaintances who have accomplished more or done better than you have. Do not be jealous of them, but see what you can learn from them and apply towards your life to achieve a similar goal".
Fair enough.

On the other hand, if you socialize mainly with people who have lower incomes than you, it tends to sets a different standard for what is a 'normal' lifestyle and there is little or no pressure to keep up with the Jones' (not that you, I or other people on this board need help resisting such pressure).
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