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Useless retirement gift from employer
Old 05-31-2014, 07:28 PM   #1
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Useless retirement gift from employer

Sorry if this has been posted before (I searched ineffectively), but I received a useless retirement gift from my employer upon my leaving my employer.

Let me just say that if you have any say in selecting a gift for exiting employees, please do not give any crystal or placard or other item that will just go in the trash. I can look online and see that you spent about $100 on this bit of bling.

Furthermore, as I cleaned out my office, I threw out similar "awards" for 5 years, 10 years, 15 years, and 20 years of service. I have good memories, but I don't need the clutter. And because these things have my name engraved on them, I cannot sell them easily on E-bay and Craigslist. OK, I haven't tried, but maybe one day I will be famous enough that someone will buy them. Not.

Clearly, the piece was mostly to make them feel good.

I suppose a better gift would have been a new smart phone for me to replace the corporate phone they were taking away from me. Yep, that would've been nice. Or even a watch since it is smaller, takes up less space, and let's me tell time.

OK, rant over. Your turn. What would you like to get? Or what did you get?

(I put this in "Young Dreamers", but I suppose it could go elsewhere on the forum.)
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Old 05-31-2014, 07:38 PM   #2
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They didn't think of getting anything for me, so I bought something for myself and put it on an expense form, with the proper documentation and receipt. Although my boss signed it, the bean counters rejected it and I never got paid back. And I couldn't return it, because it had my name engraved on it.
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Old 05-31-2014, 07:39 PM   #3
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OK, rant over. Your turn. What would you like to get? Or what did you get
I got a 100% COLA'd pension that is enough to live on with medical, dental, and prescription coverage. Nothing else.

That was enough, I didn't care about any bling.
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Old 05-31-2014, 07:44 PM   #4
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I got a 100% COLA'd pension that is enough to live on with medical, dental, and prescription coverage. Nothing else.

That was enough, I didn't care about any bling.
Wow, can't beat that!

Since the above is not generally available I would say a Visa gift card for the equivalent of one week's salary.
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Old 05-31-2014, 07:50 PM   #5
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I retired when a large chunk of stock vested, now worth almost a cool million and subject to capital gains, not income tax.
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Old 05-31-2014, 07:51 PM   #6
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I got a 100% COLA'd pension that is enough to live on with medical, dental, and prescription coverage. Nothing else.

That was enough, I didn't care about any bling.
Ditto...I'm good with that too. However, I found out my boss, who is located about 4 hrs from where I work, will be coming to town to take me & my co-workers to lunch at the restaurant of my choice.
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Old 05-31-2014, 08:17 PM   #7
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They used to do retirement gifts... but with so many corporate splits/sell offs/acquisitions since I hired on the practice has gotten lost.

2 coworkers retired early in the past month - neither got anything. I expect I'll get a double dose of the same.
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Old 05-31-2014, 08:20 PM   #8
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My friends and co-workers all chipped in and got me a rather substantial Amazon gift card. I certainly didn't expect anything - and was very touched. I also thought the Amazon gift card was a great idea. What CANT you get at Amazon!
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Old 05-31-2014, 08:34 PM   #9
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Because I did not want to be taken out to a luncheon on my final day (a close friend/coworker treated me to lunch; I always hated those big farewell luncheons for others and almost never went to them in my 23 years), those coworkers gave me the cash they would have spent on the lunch, about $160. I was pleased.
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Old 05-31-2014, 09:25 PM   #10
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I always enjoyed those farewell luncheons. Free food is free food and not to be turned down.
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Old 05-31-2014, 10:04 PM   #11
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I got the standard clock set in something hard, shiny and heavy with my name engraved. It will go into the trash when we next move.

More importantly I got a $500 gift card to a store of my choice ( I chose Walmart ) and the advice to delay my retirement by 1 day in order to exceed my 25 year anniversary and qualify for a week's extra vacation, which was paid as an extra week on my final salary check
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Old 05-31-2014, 10:15 PM   #12
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I was very pleased with my send off. I ER'd at age 49, so not really officially retired in the companies eyes. Regardless, they sent a limo to pickup my wife and I and take us to a very nice restaurant for dinner with fellow mid-level/upper management folks. I also received a very nice corporate light weight jacket. Didn't expect either, but it was much appreciated.
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Old 05-31-2014, 10:26 PM   #13
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My parting gift was a few minutes to pack my stuff into a cardboard box as they watched over me. Then they offered to help me carry my stuff six floors down to the entrance (since they failed to maintain the elevator and Inspections shut it down). I showed them how to use the freight elevator instead.

I did get a nice severance package of sorts from the unemployment office!
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Old 05-31-2014, 10:33 PM   #14
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I would have liked a life-size bronze statue of me put on the front lawn near the entrance to the corporate offices, but instead I got a lunch with a few co workers.

Oh, I also got to come back and do part time consulting work for four times the hourly rate that one normally gets. (and pick my projects)
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Old 05-31-2014, 11:14 PM   #15
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My parting gift was flying me and DW to NYC and a nice reception with appetizers and open bar at a watering hole across from the office. Many of my colleagues from my 13 years with the firm stopped by to visit and reminisce. I had a great time and great memories.

Given that technically I was resigning rather than retiring from the firm and that I had only been there 13 years, I was pleased with the nice sendoff.
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Old 06-01-2014, 06:03 AM   #16
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More importantly I got a $500 gift card to a store of my choice ( I chose Walmart ) and the advice to delay my retirement by 1 day in order to exceed my 25 year anniversary and qualify for a week's extra vacation, which was paid as an extra week on my final salary check
That was nice, and considerate. Some employers would say nothing and let you walk away.
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Old 06-01-2014, 07:00 AM   #17
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I pretty much fired myself because my gutless boss was so non-confrontational. I wish I'd made myself a better deal! We agreed on my last day (it was a Monday and I worked till that Friday) and I didn't tell anyone else till Friday. So, no farewell celebrations. I also had a company-issued smartphone and asked about keeping it. Yes, I could- for $500. I bought a new one instead for $550. I also had the foresight to get onto the Web site of our wellness program and cash in all the brownie points I'd gotten on $430 worth of Amazon.com gift cards.

(To anyone who thinks I should have let them fire me so I could collect unemployment: I had absolutely no intention of looking for work again and didn't want to pretend that I was, and was OK with that.)

A previous employer would send you a catalogue in advance of landmark anniversaries and you could choose something. I have a couple of nice pieces of jewelry from 5 and 10-year anniversaries, but the offerings included electronics, camping equipment and decorative items. I thought that was a good solution.
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Old 06-01-2014, 08:12 AM   #18
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Got no gift, free lunch, not even a card from former megacorp.
Did get a nifty Leatherman tool from a thoughtful coworker tho. That meant a lot to me and was appreciated.
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Old 06-01-2014, 08:49 AM   #19
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Not retired yet but will tell them "no thanks" on a gift when I do. We receive a gift each year on ESOP anniversary and a gift on years of service, 5, 10, 15. Everything has company logo on it and is ugly, cheap, useless, doesn't work. I give them to a friend for target practice. On the other hand where a friend works they have a catalog where they get to pick their gift. Last year, she got a Ipad.......I got a travel mug that leaks.
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Old 06-01-2014, 08:49 AM   #20
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I was very pleased with my send off. I ER'd at age 49, so not really officially retired in the companies eyes. Regardless, they sent a limo to pickup my wife and I and take us to a very nice restaurant for dinner with fellow mid-level/upper management folks. I also received a very nice corporate light weight jacket. Didn't expect either, but it was much appreciated.
The best sendoff gifts seem to be cash or experiences. Not more stuff. We don't need more stuff.
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