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Old 07-01-2010, 11:43 PM   #41
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My spouse has mentioned that she is not ready to retire, but may want to find a different job. I am definitely ready to leave the grind. However I am not sure that my spouse will come around to me not working and her working.
I have a lot of odd jobs to do around the house, and I don't mind keeping the house clean. I already cook every meal, and with more time I can find ways to save on groceries. Our car expenses will go way down with me not working. The hardest thing will be living under a strict budget, and being able to do some fun things that do not cost much.
If you add windows & laundry to your ER repertoire then I doubt you'll hear any complaints.

Play your cards right and she'll probably have some creative contributions to the "fun things that do not cost much"...
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Old 07-02-2010, 07:57 AM   #42
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Sometimes the best changes come through the back door and are not received with a warm welcome. But looking back at these days in one year you may find that your bosses did you a favour.

My recommendation: If your wife continues working do not stay in bed when she gets up to go to work but at least have breakfast with her.
My husband is a teacher and I work for megacorp. We made it a rule that even during his loooooooong school holidays we would have breakfast together in the morning. It makes me feel so much better and it gives him a good start for his activities.
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Old 07-02-2010, 04:28 PM   #43
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My recommendation: If your wife continues working do not stay in bed when she gets up to go to work but at least have breakfast with her.
My husband is a teacher and I work for megacorp. We made it a rule that even during his loooooooong school holidays we would have breakfast together in the morning. It makes me feel so much better and it gives him a good start for his activities.
I think this is great advice. Thank you.
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Old 07-06-2010, 05:52 PM   #44
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I had my meeting today. The outcome is that I will just service my accounts and build new ones at my own pace. Salary just commissions and cell phone. With my current accounts around $26k. My spouse wants me to look for another job while I continue to do this one. I personally don't feel bad about the outcome. I can work 4-6 hours a day, ask my customers for any referrals they know and do some cold calling. Before I was servicing and working on mostly house accounts and any new account I brought in I got nothing.
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Old 07-06-2010, 06:32 PM   #45
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Crispus,

Sounds more like a reprieve from burnout, than a canning! What does your wife think?

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I had my meeting today. The outcome is that I will just service my accounts and build new ones at my own pace. Salary just commissions and cell phone. With my current accounts around $26k.
I hope this works for you, and you get to work at your own pace for as long as you like. Keep planning toward FIRE, though, in case the reprieve turns out to be temporary!

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Old 07-06-2010, 07:18 PM   #46
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Salary just commissions and cell phone. With my current accounts around $26k. My spouse wants me to look for another job while I continue to do this one. I personally don't feel bad about the outcome.
You would be wise to follow your wife's suggestion

While I certainly don't know all the circumstances, it sounds like from the bosses' perspective this new arrangement is merely a temporary expediency. In the next few months, you may be cut loose entirely.

In any event, there is nothing to lose by exploring other opportunities. And at least you now have some spare time in which to interview.
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Old 07-07-2010, 08:37 AM   #47
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Many on the forum have stated its better for one spouse to stop before the other- something about adjusting to no job is better than adjusting to no job and being around spouse 24/7 (if both are retired at same time).
That's been our situation. DW/me were to retire the same day/same age.

About two months before she was to leave, she admitted that she was not "emotionally ready" (although financially ready) to retire.

A bit over three years later, I'm still happily retired (and busy); she is happily wor*ing.

Any day she wishes to hang up her spurs? She can leave with no regrets...
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Old 07-07-2010, 11:49 AM   #48
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My wife was a little depressed last night, after I told her of my employers deal. Today I have already visited 5 accounts and got 3 orders. I think that now that I am not involved with the other store and its accounts, I will be able to grow my personal account base.

My spouse wants me to look for a higher paying job aggressively. I feel that I will network to that end with my clients and friends, but I also feel that I am not that marketable at my age and experience. I ran a small family print shop, and for the last 4 years have worked for another printer.

I cut out HBO and Showtime today saving $30 per month, took a leave of absence from my golf club saving $400 per month, and lowered our automatic charitable giving saving $42 per month. I am fine with all that, but my wife says instead of cutting back how about more income. We love each other very much, but I think she needs some time to get comfortable with our new normal.
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Old 07-07-2010, 12:13 PM   #49
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My wife was a little depressed last night, after I told her of my employers deal. Today I have already visited 5 accounts and got 3 orders. I think that now that I am not involved with the other store and its accounts, I will be able to grow my personal account base.

My spouse wants me to look for a higher paying job aggressively. I feel that I will network to that end with my clients and friends, but I also feel that I am not that marketable at my age and experience. I ran a small family print shop, and for the last 4 years have worked for another printer.

I cut out HBO and Showtime today saving $30 per month, took a leave of absence from my golf club saving $400 per month, and lowered our automatic charitable giving saving $42 per month. I am fine with all that, but my wife says instead of cutting back how about more income. We love each other very much, but I think she needs some time to get comfortable with our new normal.
Crispus, I'm glad you are dealing with this so constructively. You have made advances already! DW needs some time to grieve before she is ready to move on.
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Old 07-07-2010, 12:34 PM   #50
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Crispus, as an old time sales manager the best advice I can give you is to keep your chin up and keep moving forward. You're already doing some creative thinking. You can come out of this better than before...trust me....just keep going forward.
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Old 07-07-2010, 02:56 PM   #51
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My spouse wants me to look for a higher paying job aggressively. I feel that I will network to that end with my clients and friends, but I also feel that I am not that marketable at my age and experience.... [M]y wife says instead of cutting back how about more income. We love each other very much, but I think she needs some time to get comfortable with our new normal.
You may well be correct about your limited marketability. However, I suspect that it might be helpful in your marriage if you give it the old college try and do your best to find a new job. If you are unsuccessful, at least you will have tried: which from your wife's perspective may be better than simply "giving up".

Job loss is very stressful on couples. I wish you the best of luck.
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Old 07-13-2010, 08:52 AM   #52
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I guess you could consider us young dreamers, but both of us are 56 years old and are burned out at work and want to get out asap.

We have saved around $900k (830 in reg IRA and 75 in Roth IRA). Our investments are in index funds and ETF's with a 50/50 equity/bonds spread. We have no pension, but my spouse has company paid medical for both of us. It runs about $80 per month with $1000 deductible 80/20 coverage with prescription plan. Who knows under Obama care if it will continue. We have no debt including our home as we just paid it off with our emergency fund. That emergency fund is down to $8k. Our expenses are as follows.

Condo fee $226
property taxes $300
utilities $175
cable,internet,phone $159
auto,home ins. $183
food including carryout $700
charity $100
entertainment $150
auto repair $250
auto gas $400 (this would be way lower if we retired)
home maint $200
home improv. $150
personal cash $400 (50 each per week would be lower if retired)
medical ins $81
medical ex $100
clothing $150 (lower in retirement)
travel $300 (higher in retirement)

This brings our monthly expenses to around $4000 per month. What we are hoping is that we could get some feed back on if we could retire in another year 6/11? Thanks Jeff
Chances are that some of those expenses will go down once you retire (although some may increase ... such as travel).
$900k at a 4% withdrawal rate is $3,000/month. It's best to withdraw 4% or less, that way you don't have to worry about trying to "time" the market.
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Old 07-13-2010, 01:37 PM   #53
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So here is the real question: How burnt out are you really? If you seriously think you can't take much more, perhaps you could try partial retiremenet and get a part-time job until SS kicks in. Your wife's position seems pretty demoralizing. I can't see that being good for her.

You have A LOT of expenses. Are there things you could cut out of your budget? $160 for cable,internet and phone? Do you really need all the channels you have? I personally don't even have cable. Would you rather have cable of peice of mind and relaxation?

$700 in food a month?! Can I ask what you are eating? If a majority of this is eating out, then you could probably cut this in half saving $4200 a year. Again, what's really important hear? Retiring or eating out a lot?

You can likely half your auto expenses if you cut out one of the cars. $400 in gas is a lot and I know that is related to your job.

If you can live off a bit less, then I would say go for it. Life is too short.
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Old 07-13-2010, 07:30 PM   #54
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I am into my second week of part time employment. I have been servicing my accounts about 3 hours a day. I may work more hours when my new desk, phone, and computer are set up at the office. It has been a little hard getting used to forced semi retirement. However it is getting easier each day.

That 700 per month only included 100 for restaurants. When we both worked full time we would buy alot of ready made meals at the grocery store. We shop at Wegman's, and if anyone has ever been to one you could see how we spent that much on food.

I have cut some expenses cable down to 130 cut out HBO and Showtime, groceries down to 500 per month, and gas and service on autos down to 250 and 150 respectively. Our new budget includes 500 savings per month with SmartyPig currently paying 2.15%. We will use that savings for our emergency fund and replacement car savings. Hopefully full retirement for both of us in 3.5 years.

Today I got up at 8:30 piddled on the computer for a while. Then I went on an hour long walk. I showered and went to the office to pick up some samples for a customer. I was back home buy 1pm and made myself some lunch. Took a short nap after lunch and then sat outside and smoked a cigar. I clean up the kitchen and bedroom and prepared dinner. Now my spouse and I are watching NCSI with our cats. Not a bad day at all.
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Old 07-14-2010, 02:45 AM   #55
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How far is your office from home? Would it be possible to work from home? (though this may can be a negative if you can't motivate yourself to work every day without going "some where").
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Old 07-14-2010, 07:38 AM   #56
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How far is your office from home? Would it be possible to work from home? (though this may can be a negative if you can't motivate yourself to work every day without going "some where").
My office is about 12 miles from home. I can do a lot from home.
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Of all tyrannies a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It may be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies, The robber baron's cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated; but those who torment us for own good will torment us without end, for they do so with the approval of their own conscience.
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Old 07-14-2010, 08:27 AM   #57
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Today I got up at 8:30 piddled on the computer for a while. Then I went on an hour long walk. I showered and went to the office to pick up some samples for a customer. I was back home buy 1pm and made myself some lunch. Took a short nap after lunch and then sat outside and smoked a cigar. I clean up the kitchen and bedroom and prepared dinner. Now my spouse and I are watching NCSI with our cats. Not a bad day at all.
Hey, you're already getting the hang of it! Congrats on the semi ER!
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Old 07-14-2010, 08:45 AM   #58
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Crispus,
Yep, those ready made meals help your grocery bill creep up don't they?
And I know I've picked up the ready made meals on rare occassion at a nearby Wegman's.
That works out to be about $8.33/person/day to feed you and your DW. The basic math is $500/30/2.

I know me an my DW (and our 4 kids + 1 dog) live very well on about $5.27/person/day. Granted, all the kids are 10 years old or younger, and my wife pretty much cooks every day (aside from the occasional dining out 2-3 times a month).
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Old 07-18-2010, 10:35 AM   #59
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Crispus,
Yep, those ready made meals help your grocery bill creep up don't they?
And I know I've picked up the ready made meals on rare occassion at a nearby Wegman's.
That works out to be about $8.33/person/day to feed you and your DW. The basic math is $500/30/2.

I know me an my DW (and our 4 kids + 1 dog) live very well on about $5.27/person/day. Granted, all the kids are 10 years old or younger, and my wife pretty much cooks every day (aside from the occasional dining out 2-3 times a month).
Myself, I was wondering how you keep you grocery expenses so low? Does the amount of participants keep your per person costs lower? We don't clip coupons, but our typical week of groceries consists of eggs, lots of fresh fruit and veg., some lunch meat and cheese for sandwiches, a pasta night, a farm raised salmon night, usually hamburger night, maybe a slow cooked brisket or pork roast, and sometimes eggs and bacon for dinner. The only way I know to lower costs is to eat more junk food. If you have any ideas we would be very appreciative.
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Old 07-18-2010, 11:13 AM   #60
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Myself, I was wondering how you keep you grocery expenses so low? Does the amount of participants keep your per person costs lower? We don't clip coupons, but our typical week of groceries consists of eggs, lots of fresh fruit and veg., some lunch meat and cheese for sandwiches, a pasta night, a farm raised salmon night, usually hamburger night, maybe a slow cooked brisket or pork roast, and sometimes eggs and bacon for dinner. The only way I know to lower costs is to eat more junk food. If you have any ideas we would be very appreciative.
You could eat more junk food, or keep incomplete records. I am single and spend about $400 or a little more per month. Since I am single, I eat more steaks and I eat only wild fish which does cost more. I almost never eat a meat or fish variety that is not really fresh and also a really good sale price. But if salmon costs $15.99/#, a good sale might still be around $10/#. I drink only cheap Trader Joe type wine. Though I can tell the difference I don't care as much about wine as I care about the food. If I still ate the quantities that I ate 10 or 15 years ago it would cost me close to twice as much. I have always eaten this way, as a student, as a young single man and as a family of four. My mother and father fed us this way too, and I appreciated that. I am not one of these people who goes into the fish market and asked the clerk what looks good- I know what will be good. I also spend much much less than many others who may buy some king salmon at $24/pound, even though the run is getting late and the flesh does not look good when right next to it is beautiful fresh wild coho on sale for $8.99.

I do try to save money by being willing to walk around to 4 or more groceries, because there can be >50% price difference on the same item, based on sales.

OTOH, other than the fish if I moved to Dallas Metro it might cost 25-30% less. Prices do vary a lot around the country. My brother eats very well down there on less than $300/mo.

Most save-money food programs are based on substituting meats, fruits and non-starchy vegetable with potatoes and grain products and cheap oils. Some money can be saved by shopping in bulk at places like Sam's or Costco, if the stored items don't lose quality or take up more than the amount saved in floor space and car expenses to get there.

When I take an all-in estimate of the stochastic cost of club shopping, I won't do it except for expernsive electronics. Somebody might hit me in the parking lot, I might get a ticket driving there, it takes gasoline to go...and I really don't want to! I reserve driving for visiting people and absolute necessity.

Ha
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