Wisdom from the experienced

[cute fuzzy bunny]

Does it involve a bottle of tequila?

[flipstress]

No cigar, CFB, i. e., no tequila.

HaHa, thanks!

[ESRBob]

Shiny and Flipstress--
Good point that FIRE and Zen/Be Here Now have a lot in common -- I agree. But it is probably only possible because we've done so much planning and preparing for the future that now you can put your noload funds on autopilot 1/year rebalance mode and know your family's needs are covered.

Someone once said, 'there is nothing like a large sum of money in the bank to allow you to experience a great Buddhistic calm"

I thought a lot about that early in my saving/accumulation days and committed to 10 more years without a great Buddhistic calm in order to spend the remainder of my life at least having a pretty good shot at it.

Its kind of a cheesy shortcut route to enlightenment -- after all you should be able to experience this peace at the drop of a hat, any time any place, any context, but I'm nowhere close to that. FIRE works well for me, though. At least once I discovered asset allocation, buy-and-hold, SWR with annual rebalancing etc, and during years when the market keeps heading up!

[cute fuzzy bunny]

What did the hot dog vendor say to the buddhist when he asked for the change from his hot dog?


"Change must come from within."

[ESRBob]

Very cute...
He could have also given him a few choice words about eating hot dogs! Simple fix: change hot dog to tofu-burger. somehow it doesn't quite work but oh well, I never could tell jokes...

[cute fuzzy bunny]

Why couldnt the buddhist vacuum under his couch?



Because he had no attachments.

[ESRBob]

Hee hee --
Got any more buddhist jokes? You're on a roll! I'll have to try these out at my meditation classes...

[cute fuzzy bunny]

Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused his dentist's Novocain during root canal work?


He wanted to transcend dental medication!

[shiny]

Quote:

Originally Posted by ESRBob Shiny and Flipstress-- Good point that FIRE and Zen/Be Here Now have a lot in common -- I agree. But it is probably only possible because we've done so much planning and preparing for the future that now you can put your noload funds on autopilot 1/year rebalance mode and know your family's needs are covered.

I know this is true! It is much easier to not worry about the future when you've already worried so much about it and planned/saved for it. I do think that during the working years I acknowledge that I wasn't being in the now, but not being materialistic (too much so anyway!) and knowing that life was more than things helped me to turn my monetary goals into a goal for freedom from striving for more, more more!

[ESRBob]

TH/CFB
Now I'm thinking you have a whole list of these and you're just dribbling them out one at a time to keep us hanging on our seats. OK, I'll bite -- got another?

[sgeeeee]

Q: How many Zen buddhists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None, they are the light bulb.

[cute fuzzy bunny]

Did you hear about the Buddhist who spilled his coffee while driving to work?


He had bad kar-mug.

[MasterBlaster]

My Carma ran over your Dogma

[Nords]

Quote:

Originally Posted by sgeeeee Q: How many Zen buddhists does it take to change a light bulb? A: None, they are the light bulb.*

Only one, but it has to truly want to change.

[MasterBlaster]

They are not Light Bulbs - They are Dark Suckers. eg. how many buddists does it take to change a dark sucker.



Dark Suckers
Bell Labs Proves Existence of Dark Suckers

For years it has been believed that electric bulbs emitted light. However,
recent information from Bell Labs has proven otherwise. Electric bulbs
don't emit light, they suck dark. Thus they now call these bulbs dark
suckers. The dark sucker theory, according to a Bell Labs spokesperson,
proves the existence of dark, that dark has mass heavier than that of
light, and that dark is faster than light.

The basis of the dark sucker theory is that electric bulbs suck dark. Take
for example, the dark suckers in the room where you are. There is less dark
right next to them than there is elsewhere. The larger the dark sucker, the
greater its capacity to suck dark. Dark suckers in a parking lot have a
much greater capacity than the ones in this room. As with all things, dark
suckers don't last forever. Once they are full of dark, they can no longer
suck. This is proven by the black spot on a full dark sucker. A candle is a
primitive dark sucker. lA new candle has a white wick. You will notice that
after the first use, the wick turns black, representing all the dark which
has been sucked into it. If you hold a pencil next to the wick of an
operating candle, the tip will turn black because it got in the path of the
dark flowing into the candle.

Unfortunately, these primitive dark suckers have a very limited range.
There are also portable dark suckers. The bulbs in these can't handle all
of the dark by themselves, and must be aided by a dark storage unit. When
the dark storage unit is full, it must be either emptied or replaced before
the portable dark sucker can operate again.

Dark has mass. When dark goes into a dark sucker, friction from this mass
generates heat. Thus it is not wise to touch an operating dark sucker.
Candles present a special problem, as the dark must travel in the solid
wick instead of through glass. This generates a great amount of heat. Thus
it can be very dangerous to touch an operating candle. Dark is also heavier
than light. If you swim deeper and deeper, you notice it gets slowly darker
and darker. When you reach a depth of approximately fifty feet, you are in
total darkness. This is because the heavier dark sinks to the bottom of the
lake and the lighter light floats to the top. The immense power of dark can
be utilized to mans advantage. We can collect the dark that has settled to
the bottom of lakes and push it through turbines, which generate
electricity and help push it to the ocean where it may be safely stored.
Prior to turbines, it was much more difficult to get dark from the rivers
and lakes to the ocean. The Indians recognized this problem, and tried to
solve it. When on a river in a canoe travelling in the same direction as
the flow of the dark, they paddled slowly, so as not to stop the flow of
dark, but when they traveled against the flow of dark, they paddled quickly
so as to help push the dark along its way.

Finally, we must prove that dark is faster than light. If you were to stand
in an illuminated room in front of a closed, dark closet, then slowly open
the closet door, you would see the light slowly enter the closet, but since
the dark is so fast, you would not be able to see the dark leave the
closet.

In conclusion, Bell Labs stated that dark suckers make all our lives much
easier. So the next time you look at an electric bulb remember that it is
indeed a dark sucker.

[Chris24]

Dark Suckers
Bell Labs Proves Existence of Dark Suckers


I've seen this before. I thought it was written by G W as a term paper when he went to Yale, but appears he plagiarized it.... and to think I I thought he was really smaht !

[cute fuzzy bunny]

Boy, thats two posts today...one with smaht and one with bastid...I didnt know there were so many other bostonians around.

Actually SG is right, but for the wrong reason.

none, because the light bulb doesnt need to be changed.

[Andre1969]

For some reason, those song lyrics in Brewer's sig bring a smile to my face...

Jackass will jump and bray,

Let him bray!
Let him bray!

I don't know the song, or the context of it, but whenever I'm having an annoying time at work because a co-worker is being difficult, I just think of those words.

Thanks, Brewer, sometimes just reciting those lyrics through my mind is just enough to get me through the day!

[haha]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Andre1969 For some reason, those song lyrics in Brewer's sig bring a smile to my face... Jackass will jump and bray, Let him bray! Let him bray! I don't know the song, or the context of it, but whenever I'm having an annoying time at work because a co-worker is being difficult, I just think of those words.* Thanks, Brewer, sometimes just reciting those lyrics through my mind is just enough to get me through the day!*

It's the Jackass song, made popular in the 50s by Harry Belafonte. An album called Calypso.

Ha

[brewer12345]

Quote:

Originally Posted by HaHa It's the Jackass song, made popular in the 50s by Harry Belafonte. An album called Calypso. Ha

Ha got it. I've been enjoying Belafonte's old stuff lately and the quote seemed appropriate.