Join Early Retirement Today
Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Old 06-15-2015, 08:30 PM   #21
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Lisa99's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: The Villages
Posts: 1,327
This is a really interesting thread. At 53 I'm reading some of the comments and thinking to myself that I'm dang lucky to have been born to my generation... The thought of making my hubbies plate is a hoot!

He retired before me and more times than not he makes dinner, does the laundry and generally keeps the house going. That was the deal we made with each other when he got laid off and wanted to go ahead and retire at 49.
__________________

__________________
Lisa99 is offline   Reply With Quote
Join the #1 Early Retirement and Financial Independence Forum Today - It's Totally Free!

Are you planning to be financially independent as early as possible so you can live life on your own terms? Discuss successful investing strategies, asset allocation models, tax strategies and other related topics in our online forum community. Our members range from young folks just starting their journey to financial independence, military retirees and even multimillionaires. No matter where you fit in you'll find that Early-Retirement.org is a great community to join. Best of all it's totally FREE!

You are currently viewing our boards as a guest so you have limited access to our community. Please take the time to register and you will gain a lot of great new features including; the ability to participate in discussions, network with our members, see fewer ads, upload photographs, create a retirement blog, send private messages and so much, much more!

Old 06-15-2015, 08:51 PM   #22
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 11,019
Research suggests that marriage is good for men's physical health but what women get out of it is emotional support (sometimes).

Splitting up is distressing but less so for women, “because they have more supportive social networks”.

Marriage is good for men's bodies and women's minds - Telegraph
__________________

__________________
Meadbh is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-15-2015, 10:27 PM   #23
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
NW-Bound's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 19,438
Katsmeow has good insights.

However, my mother often complains of loneliness and reminisces about the time my father was still alive. Surely, she had to do all the cooking for him, but my father did a lot of work around the house that she does not know to do even now. I think my mother now spends a lot of time going out of the home visiting and shopping to fill in the empty hours.

I often tell my wife that when I die she will miss me sorely. I cook too (cooking is the least kind of work, as far as we are concerned), and do a lot of things she can never do. She will do fine without me, but the hassle of finding a handyman for every little thing will remind her of me.
__________________
"Old age is the most unexpected of all things that can happen to a man" -- Leon Trotsky
NW-Bound is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 06-15-2015, 10:30 PM   #24
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
NW-Bound's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 19,438
By the way, if widows do not want to commit, yet widowers tend to remarry, then whom do the widowers get remarried to? Younger women? Is that a problem?
__________________
"Old age is the most unexpected of all things that can happen to a man" -- Leon Trotsky
NW-Bound is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 06-15-2015, 11:50 PM   #25
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
haha's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Hooverville
Posts: 22,386
Quote:
Originally Posted by NW-Bound View Post
I often tell my wife that when I die she will miss me sorely. I cook too (cooking is the least kind of work, as far as we are concerned), and do a lot of things she can never do. She will do fine without me, but the hassle of finding a handyman for every little thing will remind her of me.
How unutterably romantic!

Ha
__________________
"As a general rule, the more dangerous or inappropriate a conversation, the more interesting it is."-Scott Adams
haha is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-15-2015, 11:53 PM   #26
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 11,019
Quote:
Originally Posted by NW-Bound View Post
I often tell my wife that when I die she will miss me sorely. I cook too (cooking is the least kind of work, as far as we are concerned), and do a lot of things she can never do. She will do fine without me, but the hassle of finding a handyman for every little thing will remind her of me.
Please don't come back as a ghost and haunt the house!
__________________
Meadbh is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-16-2015, 12:09 AM   #27
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Katsmeow's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 3,399
Quote:
Originally Posted by NW-Bound View Post
By the way, if widows do not want to commit, yet widowers tend to remarry, then whom do the widowers get remarried to? Younger women? Is that a problem?
I doubt it. Remember, there are a lot more widows out there than widowers. And, of course, some widows do fall in love and are happy to get married. In some cases, widows are in dire financial straits and marriage is a solution.
__________________
Katsmeow is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-16-2015, 12:24 AM   #28
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
NW-Bound's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 19,438
Quote:
Originally Posted by haha View Post
How unutterably romantic!

Ha
My wife said that no, I would be the one missing her when she dies first.

Come to think of it, after I croak, a handy pool boy can take care of all problems around the house. Maybe she won't miss me that much.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Meadbh View Post
Please don't come back as a ghost and haunt the house!
Why? If there is an afterlife, I would like to think there are other women more accessible for me to romance.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Katsmeow View Post
I doubt it. Remember, there are a lot more widows out there than widowers. And, of course, some widows do fall in love and are happy to get married. In some cases, widows are in dire financial straits and marriage is a solution.
Ah hah! There may be desperate widows out there not being able to find a match. I remember Moemg once said that she had seen widowers being courted by many women bringing them casseroles.

Why is it that women think that men can be swayed with food? Or is it really true, but I think differently because I can cook?
__________________
"Old age is the most unexpected of all things that can happen to a man" -- Leon Trotsky
NW-Bound is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 06-16-2015, 09:32 AM   #29
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Moemg's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Sarasota,fl.
Posts: 10,036
I am a widow and I live in Florida so I get to observe the mating practices of widows and widowers every day . Most men really need companionship so they either remarry , have a girl friend or play golf a lot . Otherwise they are very lonely . Women on the other hand usually jump into making social contact through clubs . Most of my widow friends are single but not lonely . They have full social calendars and are content but there are some widows who still no matter what their age want a mate so yes they deliver casseroles , go to dances and hunt their prey . This is the saddest group IMO especially when they are over 70.
__________________
Moemg is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-16-2015, 09:39 AM   #30
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Moemg's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Sarasota,fl.
Posts: 10,036
Quote:
Originally Posted by NW-Bound View Post
! There may be desperate widows out there not being able to find a match. I remember Moemg once said that she had seen widowers being courted by many women bringing them casseroles.

Why is it that women think that men can be swayed with food? Or is it really true, but I think differently because I can cook?
Since the advent of viagra they don't even have to show up with a casserole . They just have to be willing . That will sway most men !
__________________
Moemg is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-16-2015, 11:53 AM   #31
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
HFWR's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Lawn chair in Texas
Posts: 12,964
Quote:
Originally Posted by Moemg View Post
Since the advent of viagra they don't even have to show up with a casserole . They just have to be willing . That will sway most men !
From the film "Eat, Pray, Love"...

Quote:
Liz: Iím in love. Iím having a relationship with my pizza. You look like youíre breaking up with your pizza. Whatís the matter?
Sofi: I canít.
Liz: What do you mean you canít? This is Pizza Margherita in Napoli, it is imperative to eat and enjoy that pizza.
Sofi: I want to, but Iíve gained like ten pounds. I mean, Iíve got this. . .right here in my tummy, you know this. . .whatís it called? Whatís the word for it?
Liz: A muffin top. I have one too.
Sofi: I unbuttoned my jeans like five minutes ago just looking at this.
Liz: Lemme ask you a question, in all the years youíve ever undressed for a gentlemanĖ
Sofi: óit hasnít been that many.
Liz: Alright. Has he ever asked you to leave? Has he ever walked out, left?
Sofi: No.
Liz: Because he doesnít care. Heís in a room with a naked girl. Heís won the lottery. Iím so tired of saying no and waking up in the morning and recalling every single thing I ate the day before. Counting every calorie I consumed so I know exactly how much self-loathing to take into the shower. Iím going for it. I have no interest in being obese; Iím just through with the guilt. So this is what Iím going to do, Iím going to finish this pizza and then weíre going to go watch the soccer game and tomorrow weíre going to go on a little date and buy ourselves some bigger jeans.
__________________
Have Funds, Will Retire

...not doing anything of true substance...
HFWR is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-16-2015, 02:27 PM   #32
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
redduck's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: yonder
Posts: 2,066
Quote:
Originally Posted by aja8888 View Post
...They (widows) socialize a lot and don't want to remarry as they can afford not to and really don't want a crabby old man to take care of...
Darn, looks like I'll have to come up with a Plan B.
__________________
Carpe cōleī
redduck is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-16-2015, 03:56 PM   #33
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Moemg's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Sarasota,fl.
Posts: 10,036
Quote:
Originally Posted by HFWR View Post
From the film "Eat, Pray, Love"...

I see you are in touch with your feminine side !
__________________
Moemg is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-16-2015, 05:34 PM   #34
Moderator
Sarah in SC's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Charleston, SC
Posts: 13,456
Quote:
Originally Posted by Moemg View Post
I see you are touch with your feminine side !

I wanted to call him out on that, too.
__________________
ďOne day your life will flash before your eyes. Make sure it's worth watching.Ē
Gerard Arthur Way

Sarah in SC is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-16-2015, 05:46 PM   #35
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Kansas City
Posts: 7,409
Quote:
Originally Posted by braumeister View Post
Women tend to be better at communicating (despite often being rather shyer) than men, so they are generally more likely to develop deeper bonds with those they contact.

IMHO.
Riiight! At age 70 I got 'an offer I couldn't refuse'. - nailed er married. She had been a widow for a little over a year. Me 7 years since my live in girl friend of 29 yrs passed.

heh heh heh - . Happy as a clam. Did isolate tho which I figured was normal for an INTJ type.
__________________
unclemick is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-16-2015, 08:28 PM   #36
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
haha's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Hooverville
Posts: 22,386
Quote:
Originally Posted by unclemick View Post
Did isolate tho which I figured was normal for an INTJ type.
This is often not mentioned. I enjoy having a girlfriend, love feels good for both of us, and we always have nice weekends with lots of laughing. And there is sex without having to worry about some damn disease. which isn't chopped liver. But I like to dance, and she doesn't really want me to. I am not planning on anything beyond dancing, but dancing is more romantic than tennis, and many women don't want their guys to have female tennis partners either. Since all my female friends, and many of my male friends were from a dance community this is unpleasantly isolating for me. Plus there was some narcissistic fulfillment from dancing well, and for the most part I would rather dance than talk. Now that I am fully recovered from hip issues, this may have to be settled somehow.

Ha
__________________
"As a general rule, the more dangerous or inappropriate a conversation, the more interesting it is."-Scott Adams
haha is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-16-2015, 08:55 PM   #37
Recycles dryer sheets
 
Join Date: May 2013
Location: The Villages
Posts: 87
Quote:
Originally Posted by redduck View Post
I think that the news of a STD epidemic was created by the Villages' P.R. dep't..

I would not doubt that it comes from the PR department. DH and I live in The Villages and it's a lot of fun here. But as far as STD's: with our circle of friends, "swinging" refers to listening to big band music or line dancing at the town square. If there's any other swinging going on, we are out of that particular loop.
__________________
Pbkmaine is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-16-2015, 08:56 PM   #38
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
HFWR's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Lawn chair in Texas
Posts: 12,964
Quote:
Originally Posted by moemg View Post
i see you are touch with your feminine side !


Quote:
Originally Posted by sarah in sc View Post
i wanted to call him out on that, too.

ImageUploadedByEarly Retirement Forum1434506200.265642.jpg
__________________
Have Funds, Will Retire

...not doing anything of true substance...
HFWR is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-16-2015, 09:40 PM   #39
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
 
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Colorado Mountains
Posts: 2,145
Quote:
Originally Posted by Moemg View Post
I am a widow and I live in Florida so I get to observe the mating practices of widows and widowers every day . Most men really need companionship so they either remarry , have a girl friend or play golf a lot . Otherwise they are very lonely . Women on the other hand usually jump into making social contact through clubs . Most of my widow friends are single but not lonely . They have full social calendars and are content but there are some widows who still no matter what their age want a mate so yes they deliver casseroles , go to dances and hunt their prey . This is the saddest group IMO especially when they are over 70.
Well, DW died almost 6 years ago. Haven't remarried, no girlfriend, I don't like golf even a little, and I didn't know I was lonely, let alone VERY lonely. Maybe I'm just some kind of a weird Hermit type
__________________
Hermit is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 06-16-2015, 09:47 PM   #40
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Moemg's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Sarasota,fl.
Posts: 10,036
Quote:
Originally Posted by haha View Post
This is often not mentioned. I enjoy having a girlfriend, love feels good for both of us, and we always have nice weekends with lots of laughing. And there is sex without having to worry about some damn disease. which isn't chopped liver. But I like to dance, and she doesn't really want me to. I am not planning on anything beyond dancing, but dancing is more romantic than tennis, and many women don't want their guys to have female tennis partners either. Since all my female friends, and many of my male friends were from a dance community this is unpleasantly isolating for me. Plus there was some narcissistic fulfillment from dancing well, and for the most part I would rather dance than talk. Now that I am fully recovered from hip issues, this may have to be settled somehow.

Ha
It will be settled you dance with others no girl friend or you do not dance and continue with the nice relationship ! Give up the dance or dance with her ! A compatible women who puts up with your quirks is harder to find than a dance partner .
__________________

__________________
Moemg is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Medicare Widows Benefits PERSonalTime FIRE and Money 16 03-14-2015 01:31 AM
Medicare widows benefits PERSonalTime Health and Early Retirement 0 03-09-2015 02:16 PM
Anyone know of a forum for widows? WM Other topics 9 10-08-2008 06:51 PM
Social Security for Widows question bubba FIRE and Money 20 06-08-2007 08:36 PM
How long to adjust to ER? RockMiner Other topics 6 01-15-2005 10:21 PM

 

 
All times are GMT -6. The time now is 10:32 PM.
 
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.