Effects of Aging?

[O2Bfree]

I know someone much younger that had 2 and neither of them worked. Aren't the meds controlling the tachycardia?

I depends on the cause as to whether meds are the best option. Mine was caused by an extra electrical pathway in my heart. The cardiologist said I could try beta blockers, but they must be taken continuously and have side effects. He said the ablation was pretty much a sure cure for my condition. I was against it at first, it sounded too extreme, but looked into it more and decided to go for it.

Patients can have a "quiet heart" on the day of the procedure, and the electrophysiologist might not be able to trigger the problem, and so can't identify the troublesome area in the heart. That's one of the reasons why an ablation might not work. Twice, though, would be very unfortunate. Maybe there's a different cause there that's not so easy to treat.

 

[haha]

Some years ago I came across a blog by a woman who was then, I think, 57? Anyway, she lost interest in sex after menopause but was trying to "maintain function" in case she got a boy friend. I have mercifully blocked out the grim details, but she was using...stretching gadgets.....ewwwww.

Far from eww, I think this lady was forward looking and responsible to herself and any future partners, and hopeful that perhaps if she found someone who she was attracted to that intercourse would be possible for her.

My take on aging and sex is that if we want it we should plan to find partners while we can. None of us gets any prettier as time passes, and looking better rather than worse is definitely a help.

Older people can be quite down to earth about sex. Glad to see this helpful thread.

Ha

 

[Souschef]

Older people can be quite down to earth about sex. Glad to see this helpful thread.
Ha

I am 78, and DW is now 73. I remember a few years ago one incident where we started messing around in the living room and going upstairs to the bedroom, shedding clothes as we went
I am sure her kids do not want to hear about it LOL

 

[gerntz]

69 shortly here. On a statin, have taken allergy shots for 40+ years & use some skin ointments. False heart concern last August led to many tests that said I'm clean as a whistle. We'll see. Have knee that will need replacing sooner or later. Walk 4 miles every other day - running would kill the knee. Seems like the hills are higher & steeper each day though I've maintained pace. Other days I have a 40 minutes workout - if I can get thru the stationary bike part full length. That's gotten to be an issue the last year or so. Get out on the local ski hill several times each winter though the knee limits that too. Notice that balance isn't as good as in the past but that's not saying a lot when you start out a klutz. But all in all, fine.

 

[John Galt III]

If one person in a couple gets a serious illness that requires the other person to care for him/her 24/7 then 2 lives are borked at the same time: the life of the care giver and the life of the ill person.

 

[athena53]

My take on aging and sex is that if we want it we should plan to find partners while we can. None of us gets any prettier as time passes, and looking better rather than worse is definitely a help.

Older people can be quite down to earth about sex. Glad to see this helpful thread.

I know. I'm convinced that since appearance can't be a major selection criterion (I'm in wonderful physical shape but have a face and grey hair that go with being 64 years old, and know that I can't expect George Clooney lookalikes), I'll need to wait till an attraction based on other factors develops into a physical attraction, and that's OK.

 

[Tadpole]

If one person in a couple gets a serious illness that requires the other person to care for him/her 24/7 then 2 lives are borked at the same time: the life of the care giver and the life of the ill person.

A guy in my husband's Parkinson's group just had his wife of 30 years leave him apparently, according to him, because she didn't want to take on a caregiver role in retirement.

 

[tmitchell]

Awesome thread and such great reminders to carpe diem. On the impressive side, I have a woman in my yoga class who is 94 and doing (assisted) handstands!! She's my barometer and I try to do a few handstands every week. She says the key is to "keep moving."

 

[Chuckanut]

Interesting discussion.

Unless one is born with exceptional genes, we all slow down as we age. It's how we handle it that counts. The trick, IMHO, is to look for alternatives that allow one to continue moving forward. How fast and far are less important than just moving forward.

In my 20's I had a good friend who was in his 60's. We shared a lot of common interests. I learned a lot from him about aging properly. He ate real food and worked out on a rowing machine 3-4 times a week. He didn't sweet the small stuff.

He and his wife used to take long, cross country driving vacations. When that got to tiring they started taking the train (he was a railroad fan) and renting a car. Or the plane if they had to. Eventually, he signed up for educational ours with Elderhostel, where they were put on a bus and relieved of transportation worries. Always doing something to grow, have new experiences, and learn something new.

At one point well into his 70's he decided that making left turns into heavily trafficked streets was getting to stressful for him. So he got out his map, marked his home and the places he drove to most frequently and plotted out routes that were mostly or all right turns. This is a great example of how he adapted to getting older. And, as UPS and FedEx have found out, right turn only routes are far more efficient and save time. He was ahead of his time.

So that's my plan. Do my best to keep healthy. Adapt to whatever aging issues come up. And keep advancing. Don't worry about speed and distance as long as one is still moving forward.

 

[Chuckanut]

I know. I'm convinced that since appearance can't be a major selection criterion (I'm in wonderful physical shape but have a face and grey hair that go with being 64 years old, and know that I can't expect George Clooney lookalikes),

Having grown up in So. Cal, I have stumbled upon my fair share of 'movie stars' just out for a normal day. Trust me. Most of them look very average when they have not had professionals working on them for an hour or more, and are not wearing expensive, cut-to-fit clothing that accentuates their assets and hides their liabilities. And, most of them have had some 'work' done. As a 60-something Dolly Parton once said when asked why she still appeared so young, "Why honey, haven't your heard about doctors?".

 

[Amethyst]

Ummm...yeah, if she wanted sex. But she didn't want it for herself any more. She was just looking to "perform" if called upon to do so. And if a man or woman starts thinking of sex, which is meant to be natural and fun, as an obligation to "perform," IMHO, it has become a job, work, and we ER's should oppose it.

Far from eww, I think this lady was forward looking and responsible to herself and any future partners, and hopeful that perhaps if she found someone who she was attracted to that intercourse would be possible for her.

Ha

 

[Amethyst]

Sounds like standard operating procedure to me

started messing around in the living room and going upstairs to the bedroom, shedding clothes as we went

I am sure her kids do not want to hear about it LOL

We won't tell 'em.

Maybe because my parents were old enough to be my grandparents, and were openly affectionate toward each other, I somehow missed the memo that old people getting it on is supposed to be Gross.

 

[EastWest Gal]

Excessive exercising has been "linked" as they say, to AFib later in life. Ongoing erratic heart beats were one reason I severely cranked back my exercise. Especially steady state aerobics. If I run high heart rates it is only for brief periods a la interval training and only a few days per week. All that exercise was killing me



As far as looking in the mirror: I was just fine with it all until I hit 58. Then I noticed the slight creases and "extra skin" under my neck and laugh lines around the eyes that were there even when I wasn't laughing. And I thought I was aging so gracefully, too.

Switch to light weight training to maintain muscle mass. And stretching.

Regarding the laugh lines. They mean you have been laughing and smiling. Better than the perpetual frown some people get as they age.

I don't like looking at myself in the mirror either. (It's the weight-I'm diligently working on it). But DH looks older than me, but that's due to the hair. He looks like Arthur Rubenstein when he plays piano or conducts. DS isn't 25 yet and he looks like a teenager but is rapidly going bald (it's his genes). So I'm lucky I guess.

 

[Bestwifeever]

I know. I'm convinced that since appearance can't be a major selection criterion (I'm in wonderful physical shape but have a face and grey hair that go with being 64 years old, and know that I can't expect George Clooney lookalikes), I'll need to wait till an attraction based on other factors develops into a physical attraction, and that's OK.

I know, I know, it doesn't matter, but have you colored your hair with a temporary color to see how you like it? I notice in gatherings with friends who cover the gray, women and men, that they seem to act differently than the ones who don't. Sort of interesting.

Not related to your post, Athena, but to the topic in general: I also notice that some friends who reconnected with old flames see them as being no different from when they met them decades ago. If I ever have the need to find a different partner, I know who I'm calling

 

[razztazz]

Switch to light weight training to maintain muscle mass. And stretching.

.

Somewhat out in front of you. The past several years I've been doing a pushup routine for upper body and squats with a 40 pound kettle bell for legs. And not everyday.

I'm sure I could get all "OCD" about it and do more or add different things but that's what was killing me in the first place. Enough is enough

 

[athena53]

I know, I know, it doesn't matter, but have you colored your hair with a temporary color to see how you like it? I notice in gatherings with friends who cover the gray, women and men, that they seem to act differently than the ones who don't. Sort of interesting.

No, I haven't. I joke that I'm too lazy and too cheap. I put a lot of work into maintaining my body but that's partly because of all the beneficial health effects and it's not that expensive (gym membership $20/month and I work out in shorts and freebie T-shirts from various events I attend).

I may try coloring my hair at some point. I was widowed less than 3 months ago so I'm not ready for any relationships yet.

 

[anethum]

I'm 62 and in good physical condition, perhaps thanks to lots of biking and walking. My dad played tennis regularly until he was 85, when the onset of polymyalgia ended his tennis playing.

One thing which has gradually diminished as I've aged is my ability to improve my vocabulary in foreign languages. Learning new grammar rules or improving my accent is not more difficult, however. Also, there is a certain ease my brain has when I speak one of the languages I first studied compared to the later ones, regardless of my overall knowledge of the language. The inability to sometimes recall words in my native English is disconcerting.

I FIRE'd when I was 57, but haven't traveled nearly as much as I would have liked due to eldercare needed for my parents, first for my dad whose vascular dementia began at about 90, and now my mom whose dementia became noticeable a few months after my dad died. I hope that I'll still be able to go on moderately strenuous bicycle trips when I can get away for longer periods than I can at present.

 

[haha]

Ummm...yeah, if she wanted sex. But she didn't want it for herself any more. She was just looking to "perform" if called upon to do so. And if a man or woman starts thinking of sex, which is meant to be natural and fun, as an obligation to "perform," IMHO, it has become a job, work, and we ER's should oppose it.

Sounds quite lovely, but I can imagine someone wanting a romantic partner possibly for social or even financial reasons, and wanting to be able to offer what all the other girls will be offering.

Also, how could one be sure that under better circumstances, like a new partner, a better outlook or whatever, she might not decide that she likes it quite well after all?

Ha

 

[Teacher Terry]

Anethum: have you thought about getting respite care for your Mom so you could travel? That is what my Mom did for my Dad because she wanted to take a 2 week vacation each year and my Dad was sick for 14 years.

 

[anethum]

Teacher Terry: my mom stubbornly refused to accept any home help or consider moving out of the house she's lived in for 60 years. Then, about 8 weeks ago, my mom fell and she fractured her pelvis and wrist. She came home from a rehab facility a month ago and now has 24/7 caregivers. She has healed astonishingly well for someone who is 95. She quickly went from a walker to a cane, and doesn't always use the cane anymore. However, her short-term memory remains awful, and she doesn't have much energy. She lives 10 minutes from me and I've been cooking her dinner every night since she returned home. (I think I'll soon be able to have her prepare her own dinners.) I also buy her groceries & drugs, pay the caregivers, take her to doctors' appts, and handle her finances. I have a sibling who lives just as close as I do but who refuses to help.

A friend & I had planned to be on a bike trip in S. America right now but we had to put off the trip after my mom fell. I will get away for a week beginning next week, however. Some friends & I are now planning a multi-week bike trip in September.

 

[Teacher Terry]

It's so important to get a break. I used to take care of my Dad to help my Mom. I was the only 1 of 3 kids that did. However, once I moved across the country for a job and my Mom needed help the last few years my other 2 siblings did step up to the plate (my sister more then my brother).

 

[athena53]

Sounds quite lovely, but I can imagine someone wanting a romantic partner possibly for social or even financial reasons, and wanting to be able to offer what all the other girls will be offering.

I'm darn grateful I don't need a new partner for financial reasons. I'm more worried about making sure that the guy isn't in that position!

 

[Nemo2]

I'm more worried about making sure that the guy isn't in that position!

I'm kinda losing track now - are we back to talking about sex here?

 

[Moemg]

No no, MY bad knees are worse!

How are your knees ? Has the synvisc helped ?

 

[athena53]

I'm kinda losing track now - are we back to talking about sex here?

No, we're in mixed company!