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Retirement and boredom
Old 01-14-2008, 06:25 AM   #1
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Retirement and boredom

Newly retired and loving it so far but up till now (1 month) its just feels like a long vacation,I have resurrected a bunch of hobbies but am wondering what happens when the novelty wears off.I live in an apartment so doing stuff around the house is not going to keep me busy,its winter and i hate any kind of winter activities,and i've always been somewhat of a loner in life so joining clubs of some sort wont be very enjoyable,volunteering i never understood as why should i work for nothing.also i dont have unlimited money so constant travel aint gonna happen.Its looking like come spring i'm going to have to get some kind of employment just to give my life some form of structure.
Anyone else find that the dream of retirement can be a bit of a bore?
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Old 01-14-2008, 06:45 AM   #2
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Originally Posted by jambo101 View Post
...Its looking like come spring i'm going to have to get some kind of employment just to give my life some form of structure.
Anyone else find that the dream of retirement can be a bit of a bore?
Flame suit on.
When I get bored, returning to work isn't appealing.

I have a retired friend who needed "structure," so he structured his retired life. He eats lunch with one friend every Tuesday at the same Chinese buffet restaurant, then other friends each Wednesday at a fast food place, then with his girlfriend each Friday at the same pizza parlor.

He has other activities on his schedule, e.g. always reads the paper and does the crossword puzzle at the same time each day.

There's some merit to his approach, though it is too rigid for me.
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Old 01-14-2008, 06:53 AM   #3
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jambo, in your case I think returning to work is probably going to be a good idea. If you're beginning to experience boredom after only one month, you probably aren't wired for retirement, early or otherwise.

And for you folks who might consider flaming jambo for his 'failure to thrive' in retirement, I suggest you view him as a brave volunteer in the War to Defend SS Benefits (or whatever the Canadian equivalent) and thank him for his service.
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Old 01-14-2008, 07:13 AM   #4
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Jambo101,
I think you just have the courage to say what others are thinking. It's hard to give up a routine and your identity through work. Clearly, there must have been things about your job you didn't care for or you would not have retired from it. In your situation, a job might be a good idea. Perhaps part time work might give you the best of both worlds. Also, look for something you enjoy - perhaps a different line of work - and give it a whirl. You can always leave if it doesn't work out as planned.
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Old 01-14-2008, 07:23 AM   #5
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I cannot imagine feeling bored in retirement, personally (though I'm still working, so who knows what the future will bring?).

But then, if we were all alike the world truly WOULD be a boring place!
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Old 01-14-2008, 07:35 AM   #6
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If you do not have a passion outside of work then it probably makes sense to get a job. I would consider a fun part time job though. And your boredom might be more of a winter blues thing. Consider a temp job for now. Come spring time, you might be glad you do not have a job.
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Old 01-14-2008, 07:44 AM   #7
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Jambo, to each their own I am going on 2 years with no unusual boredom yet. If I get bored I plan to take some classes (maybe astronomy).
However, everyone is wired differently. Find your passion and pursue it. If that passion is work, more power to you!
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Old 01-14-2008, 07:56 AM   #8
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Wish I'd known you were bored. You could have helped me cut trees this weekend. Nothing like being outside breathing all that fresh winter air. It made doing nothing feel pretty good while all the muscles spasmed back to neutral again. Now doing it in the snow might not be so much fun.

Did you enjoy working before you retired? What things about working did you enjoy? Not enjoy? Sounds like some self-analysis is in order to help you find what brings you the most pleasure. Good luck.
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Old 01-14-2008, 08:17 AM   #9
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Three thoughts.

1 - It takes a brave person to admit they may have made a mistake. If what you did before was enjoyable, maybe you just want to go back to it.

2 - To paraphrase a '70's dirty joke; if you're bored, you're doing it wrong.

3 - I'm not sure that only one month is enough time to know whether you are cut out for it or not. I think you are actually still in the "decompression" phase. I have learned over the years that a one week vacation is a waste of leave for me. It takes three days just to unwind, I get one day to enjoy, and then I spend the next three days dreading the return. I'd give it another two months at least.
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Old 01-14-2008, 08:33 AM   #10
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Jambo101,

Jonathan Clements included some research on this subject in an article that was published yesterday:

Getting Going - WSJ.com
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Old 01-14-2008, 08:37 AM   #11
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This might interest you: http://finance.yahoo.com/retirement/...new-retirement
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Old 01-14-2008, 09:04 AM   #12
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I have resurrected a bunch of hobbies
List all your hobbies. Find one that involves becoming better at something (For example, playing a musical instrument rather than fishing), and really work on it. Set some goals. I like fishing, but get bored with it if I do it too often. Practicing piano I can do each day, and enjoy seeing small improvements.

I know that doesn't work for everyone, but going back to work sounds a little like saying "I can't think of anything to do, so I'm going to have someone else tell me what I have to do."
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Old 01-14-2008, 09:39 AM   #13
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Originally Posted by jambo101 View Post
Newly retired and loving it so far but up till now (1 month) its just feels like a long vacation,I have resurrected a bunch of hobbies but am wondering what happens when the novelty wears off.I live in an apartment so doing stuff around the house is not going to keep me busy,its winter and i hate any kind of winter activities,and i've always been somewhat of a loner in life so joining clubs of some sort wont be very enjoyable,volunteering i never understood as why should i work for nothing.also i dont have unlimited money so constant travel aint gonna happen.Its looking like come spring i'm going to have to get some kind of employment just to give my life some form of structure.
Anyone else find that the dream of retirement can be a bit of a bore?
Flame suit on.
Didn't we just go through this a few months ago? For someone responsible for their own entertainment, you seem to be finding a lot of reasons that you can't enjoy yourself.
http://www.early-retirement.org/foru...ire-30362.html
Do you feel your enjoyment of life, ER attitude, or happiness factor has improved since then?

You were talking about a Florida vacation. Is your current state of mind a side effect of your winter climate, and will life seem better in sunshine & warmth?

"Novelty"? I don't know what hobbies you're working on, but like Al says there are hobbies that never lose their novelty. Maybe it'll help to consider different hobbies. When I paddle out I can ogle hot surfer chicks just enjoy the beach weather, cruise in a straight line, or try to really embarrass myself hang five and do cutbacks. If that ever gets boring (I wouldn't recognize it, it hasn't happened yet) then I can try stand-up paddle surfing or kayak surfing or kitesurfing or windsurfing. And more than two or three times a week is an ibuprofen challenge, let alone a neglect of my chores.

What's on your reading list? Amazon.com can provide best-seller lists, topic lists, and additional suggestions. I have to limit my browsing there or I'd never leave the house.

A friend of ours retired retired from the Navy several years back. All he could talk about was selling his San Diego home for huge equity profits, moving back to his Florida hometown, and ogling hot surfer chicks taking a part-time lifeguard job. Three months later we ran into him in Pearl Harbor where he was working a contract job and telling us that he was so bored with his retirement he didn't even want to leave the house to walk his dog. He found steady contract work with old shipmates, hasn't taken a vacation in the last three years, and is happily back to fantasizing about selling his San Diego home, moving back to his Florida hometown, and so on.

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I know that doesn't work for everyone, but going back to work sounds a little like saying "I can't think of anything to do, so I'm going to have someone else tell me what I have to do."
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Originally Posted by REWahoo View Post
jambo, in your case I think returning to work is probably going to be a good idea. If you're beginning to experience boredom after only one month, you probably aren't wired for retirement, early or otherwise.
If your idea of entertainment constructive dialogue is trolling "I'm bored" flame-enticing threads on Internet discussion boards, then you're right-- you do need to go back to work.

If you can't be responsible for your own entertainment, then perhaps you'll find it in the office environment it's time to seek elsewhere.
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Old 01-14-2008, 09:48 AM   #14
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Jambo,

If I read your post carefully, it doesn't say that you are bored, but rather you are afraid you will get bored. You are doing your hobbies, but wonder what will happen when the novelty wears off because you are not a "joiner". If you are only RE 1 month, you are probably still decompressing and still in the w*rk worry mode. Deep breath.

When/if a problem arises, you will deal with it - either find a new hobby or get a PT j*b.

In the mean time, check your list (or make one), of all of the things you said you were going to do - and keep adding to it. Refer back to this list as necessary.
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Old 01-14-2008, 11:06 AM   #15
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Originally Posted by LeatherneckPA View Post

3 - I'm not sure that only one month is enough time to know whether you are cut out for it or not. I think you are actually still in the "decompression" phase. I have learned over the years that a one week vacation is a waste of leave for me. It takes three days just to unwind, I get one day to enjoy, and then I spend the next three days dreading the return. I'd give it another two months at least.
I would suggest up to six months before deciding.

You didn't say you are bored, you said you think you will become bored, so why not wait until you are bored?

Quote:
When I get bored, returning to work isn't appealing.

I have a retired friend who needed "structure," so he structured his retired life. He eats lunch with one friend every Tuesday at the same Chinese buffet restaurant, then other friends each Wednesday at a fast food place, then with his girlfriend each Friday at the same pizza parlor.

He has other activities on his schedule, e.g. always reads the paper and does the crossword puzzle at the same time each day.

There's some merit to his approach, though it is too rigid for me.
I followed my retirement with about three months of personal anarchy.

After getting that out of my system, I started setting up personal schedules. For example: run the dishwasher Monday and Wednesday; vacuum on Monday; water plants on Saturday.

I also started investigating what foods were good and tasty, and set up eating patterns. For example: two servings of fresh fruit per day at lunch (the exact fruit can be almost anything).

Setting things on automatic ensures the house stays at least minimally clean, I remain healthy, and the cat and the plants thrive.

These schedules/patterns are altered as circumstances change. I will be scheduling more exercise (30 minute walk) starting when the weather is a bit more amenable.
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Old 01-14-2008, 12:19 PM   #16
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List all your hobbies. Find one that involves becoming better at something (For example, playing a musical instrument rather than fishing),
I've stood in the river getting nothing while watching the guy next to me pull out fish after fish to think that I at least wouldn't have a lot of room to get better as a fisherman.

Ha
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Old 01-14-2008, 01:16 PM   #17
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Well, you've always got that model rr to work on. That's what's been occupying a LOT of my free time for the last month and a half or so. The more time and effort that I spend designing and working on it, the less I have done by the end of the day (or evening). I've been 'finishing' it for well over 20 years, and the closer it is to completion, the farther it is from finished! It's been a great winter "occupation"....a.k.a. "time filler". I'm forever researching things, looking for new and/or better ideas & methods, and changing & tweaking things. A portion of it is dang near finished, (only a few little touches of detail or weathering left to do), and another portion is just sketched out, then there is a vast majority of it that lies somewhere in between.....(and hopefully always will so I have something to occupy my time, especially during the winter's 'cold & gray days'. During Spring, Summer, and Fall I always find a lot of other things to do and enjoy....sometimes just sitting staring at clouds and daydreaming.

And like Nords, I probably spend way too much time 'window shopping' at Amazon......and Books-A-Million....and Walthers....and.....

The only thing I have close to 'structure' in my life, is that I meet a few of my friends for coffee once or twice a week. They go EVERY day, but I randomly choose 1 or 2 days when I'm not busy doing something (or nothing). Then I have my Garden Club meeting each month, and maybe 3 or 4 other activities with them each year. That's about the extent of my 'structured' activities. Oh yeah, and I try to make time to watch "Merv Griffin's Crosswords" and "Jeopardy" each afternoon......I have about a 60% success rate at fitting them in.....I'm usually too busy squandering my time on something else!

My first month or 2 was like an extended vacation and I was wondering if or when the novelty would wear off....but then without even realizing it, the retired life really set in, and the novelty has never worn off, and boredom has never set in!
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Old 01-14-2008, 01:38 PM   #18
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My first month or 2 was like an extended vacation and I was wondering if or when the novelty would wear off....but then without even realizing it, the retired life really set in, and the novelty has never worn off, and boredom has never set in!
Sounds like my first couple of months in retirement, too. Also spent a lot of time catching up on sleep in those first few weeks -- so I agree that there is a definite realignment, decompression, de-stressing, whatever that your body and psyche needs to go through.

I've now been retired for almost 13 months, and I have yet to be bored. Yes, some days are more structured than others and some days I'm still in my pjs and slippers till after lunch...that's the beauty of being retired. It's all ok!

During my working career, I never was dedicated to exercise; I couldn't keep on any kind of regular schedule with it and so I confined my exercise routine (such as it was) to walking the dogs. Now, I exercise five days a week at my local Y and enjoy the challenge of pushing myself to add another set, another rep, another lap or extra minutes on the treadmill. This is something I never thought I'd be doing in retirement, but I am really enjoying it...and improving my health as well.

You made one comment that saddened me a bit when you said you wouldn't consider volunteering because you wouldn't get paid for it. I really hope at some point in your retirement you have the opportunity to get involved in some volunteer activity that you enjoy as there are few things in life that can make you feel as good as when you are helping others in need. I've started volunteering at a local animal shelter as that's a cause close to my heart. I don't get involved with direct animal care as I'm a sucker for cute puppies and already have enough pets to care for, but I do help with their fund raising efforts. My career was in non-profit organizations, but I have never felt such a sense of accomplishment as when I'm doing my volunteer work. (I'll get off my soap box now...)
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Old 01-14-2008, 02:01 PM   #19
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I like the idea of having a few structured/scheduled activities, maybe it will give you some things to look forward to.

The ideas of chores, clubs, and eating out on schedule are good. Basically the idea might be that even if you see that you didn't get anything done one day, and that bothers you, you can go to bed and say, "That's ok, because tomorrow I have ____ to do."

In my case, if it gets to that, I might pick a day to be "library day", where I go hang out at the library and catch up on magazines and papers. or browse a non-fiction section I hadn't spent much time in before (or a new letter in fiction). I find the library a very comfortable place. If I drank coffee I might've come up with the idea of a coffee shop in a bookstore, because it's kind of the same concept to me. I'm more likely to pick a rainy day for library day than schedule it, but you get the idea.

Other good "loner" ideas? You could pick one day a week to be movie day, go rent whatever you want. By scheduling it you make it special and won't run out of movies to rent as fast as if you do it whenever you are bored.

How about people watch at a mall or park?

Are you allowed to have a pet? If you like them, walking a dog gives you responsibility and exercise.
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Old 01-14-2008, 02:21 PM   #20
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Lotsa good advice thanks,i think things are really going to pick up come springtime. I think what i'm worried about is cabin fever which i usually get about this time every year but in the past work gave me 8hrs a day away from the cabin.
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