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Old 05-29-2016, 02:52 PM   #21
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F is a pretty smart guy! Add to that new parents!
+1

And siblings. Worst of all, new sibling parents.
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Old 05-29-2016, 02:54 PM   #22
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I was wondering the same thing! This MUST be in real life, since on forums like this we can pick and choose which threads we want to read. There are certain topics that I just never click on.

...
This exactly. It's a good idea to avoid people and topics that we're not interested in. My point was that just because someone lives differently than you choose to does not necessarily equate to your feeling superior to them.
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Old 05-29-2016, 02:57 PM   #23
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But even then this outrage about public expenditures is selective. People are quick to point out that "fat people" drive up health care costs. But they also (on average) die several years earlier than "healthy" people who make all the "right" decisions. That's several less years on Medicare, on public employee health insurance, on public pensions, on Social Security. These are all cost *savings*. Yet almost none of the folks who complain about the high public costs of "bad decisions" are willing to take those into account. It's distasteful to sound like you are profiting from early death and I get that, but an honest assessment of overall public costs of "bad lifestyle choices" needs to account for it.

+1. Never hear anyone complain about the knee surgeries long distance runners seem to need more than others...
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Old 05-29-2016, 03:03 PM   #24
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It's the basic premise of Judeo/Christian/Islamic philosophy -- separate everyone into "us" and "Them."
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Old 05-29-2016, 03:09 PM   #25
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It's the basic premise of Judeo/Christian/Islamic philosophy -- separate everyone into "us" and "Them."
Not wanting to get into a theological debate here, but I'm pretty sure Jesus taught the exact opposite. He regularly took the Pharisees and others to task for doing what you described.
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Old 05-29-2016, 03:13 PM   #26
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What I care about is seeing overweight folks in the gym doing something constructive to make themselves healthier. They deserve kudos, respect, and encouragement. Otherwise, its none of my business.
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Old 05-29-2016, 03:49 PM   #27
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F is a pretty smart guy! Add to that new parents!
Absolutely! Oh, SO true. Especially new parents with a billion photos on their smartphones.

And when I told him today at lunch that I had passed on his saying to the forum in this thread, he said I also forgot to include people who just quit smoking.
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Old 05-29-2016, 03:52 PM   #28
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And when I told him today at lunch that I had passed on his saying to the forum in this thread, he said I also forgot to include people who just quit smoking.
Oh, yes. Just quit smoking, just quit drinking, just lost 100 pounds, just found religion, you name it.
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Old 05-29-2016, 03:54 PM   #29
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What I care about is seeing overweight folks in the gym doing something constructive to make themselves healthier. They deserve kudos, respect, and encouragement. Otherwise, its none of my business.
So true!!! The hardest working guy I ever saw at my gym probably weighed close to 500 pounds. He was on that elliptical for at least an hour every day for several years, working so hard at it day after day but unfortunately without losing an ounce AFAIK. I often thought I should convey some kudos, respect, and encouragement but didn't know exactly how to do it tactfully.
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Old 05-29-2016, 04:21 PM   #30
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The hardest working guy I ever saw at my gym probably weighed close to 500 pounds. He was on that elliptical for at least an hour every day for several years, working so hard at it day after day but unfortunately without losing an ounce AFAIK.
I have seen a number of people like this that are doing the right things, exercise and nutrition wise, yet they don't seem to lose weight, and thats why I feel there is much more to it than CICO. Thyroid, digestive, and other metabolic anomalies come into play, and it must be heartbreaking to put in the work in the kitchen and gym, but not see results.
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Old 05-29-2016, 05:27 PM   #31
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I care if my love ones are fat. this was my very best friend J in february, we got together for dinner a few months ago. 2 weeks later I gave the Eulogy at her funeral. she was 55 years old, died from a massive heart attack due to obesity. She met her husband at my wedding, she was a bridesmaid and he was a groomsman. We have been friends for 40 years. shared everything.



She struggled with her weight all her life. she left behind so many loved ones, the school she taught at closed on the day of her funeral because so many of the students wanted to attend.

Yes, I most definitely care. 55 is to young to die from a totally preventable issue
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Old 05-29-2016, 05:50 PM   #32
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I'm so sorry. She must have been a wonderful person.

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I care if my love ones are fat. this was my very best friend J in february, we got together for dinner a few months ago. 2 weeks later I gave the Eulogy at her funeral. she was 55 years old, died from a massive heart attack due to obesity. She met her husband at my wedding, she was a bridesmaid and he was a groomsman. We have been friends for 40 years. shared everything.



She struggled with her weight all her life. she left behind so many loved ones, the school she taught at closed on the day of her funeral because so many of the students wanted to attend.

Yes, I most definitely care. 55 is to young to die from a totally preventable issue
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Old 05-29-2016, 05:58 PM   #33
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I care if my love ones are fat.
Sorry to hear of this. Her smile looks warm and infectious and may have been indicative of the type of person she was. Look, I don't think people are suggesting that they shouldn't be concerned for the health of obese loved ones. But the ridicule, the snarky comments, the discrimination.... they aren't helpful.

You can't tell ethnic jokes or gender jokes or sexual orientation jokes any more without career repercussions, and perhaps that's a good thing. But wow, watching Jimmy Fallon (and probably other late night hosts) in the last few months... any time Chris Christie was mentioned you KNEW a fat joke was coming. That appalls me, frankly. Fat jokes are still politically correct.

Yes, by all means care, and if you can convey that in a loving, constructive way, great. But don't crack mean jokes about them or judge them as weak, inferior people because of their weight.
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Old 05-29-2016, 06:37 PM   #34
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You can't tell ethnic jokes or gender jokes or sexual orientation jokes any more without career repercussions, and perhaps that's a good thing. But wow, watching Jimmy Fallon (and probably other late night hosts) in the last few months... any time Chris Christie was mentioned you KNEW a fat joke was coming. That appalls me, frankly. Fat jokes are still politically correct.

Yes, by all means care, and if you can convey that in a loving, constructive way, great. But don't crack mean jokes about them or judge them as weak, inferior people because of their weight.

Thanks for the warm thoughts all, J was an absolute gem.

I think there are a lot of different issues.

First, the reality is we live in a culture where a size 4 is what our girls are bombarded as "good", so many messages out there saying if you're not small, you're in trouble. there are who stores that pride themselves on only catering to "cool, skinny kids"

Now remember also that Jimmy fallon, Chris Rock, Lewis Black, etc these guys are comedians Bernie Sanders get "old" jokes.

I do agree the "weight" seems to be an acceptable area open to allowable ridicule but I also see the weight problem growing. You should see my nieces 3rd grade class. she's got 160 lb 8 year old playmates.

Have you seen Jamie Olivers ted talk?
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Old 05-29-2016, 06:56 PM   #35
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It honestly breaks my heart to see people who struggle with their weight, especially younger folks who are experiencing disease and disabilities in their 20s and 30s that normally don't show up until much later in life.

I'm trying to make a habit of being kind and friendly toward them as I'm sure they get plenty of stares and derogatory comments. I just wish there was more I could do to encourage them to make healthy changes.
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Old 05-29-2016, 07:13 PM   #36
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I know this is quibbling, but size 4 isn't small, these days. It is more of a medium size. A woman can weigh 135 pounds and wear size 4.

I do agree that a slender or willowy frame seems to be preferred over a robust one, as a beauty ideal for girls and women (not men, though). Because such genes aren't handed out very often, that build seems like something to "aspire" to, possibly via an eating disorder. That could be a separate thread on its own.
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First, the reality is we live in a culture where a size 4 is what our girls are bombarded as "good", so many messages out there saying if you're not small, you're in trouble. ?
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Why do some people care so much that others are fat?
Old 05-29-2016, 07:23 PM   #37
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Why do some people care so much that others are fat?

Personally I don't have much opinion good or bad toward overweight people. I do wonder why or how they gained so much weight. I am hyperthyroid under meds and I also know people who are hypo and they gain weight even if they eat much less than I do) so I wonder if some of the overweight people have a hypo problem.

One thing I am very concerned about is children in America who are fed so much refined carbs at home and at school that they have no choice but to gain unhealthy amount of weight. (Can you imagine school lunches that serve Pizza Hut pizzas, French fries and burgers? I highly recommend watching Fed Up narrated by Katie Couric.)

It is very difficult to decide what diet is most helpful for weight loss. There are too many conflicting information here as to what we should eat. We already know If we eat less calories, we will lose weight, but it is simply too hard to eat less and that's why people keep on talking the talk but not walking the walk. if someone can figure out how to curve the craving (feel satiated without eating as much), we have a good chance of losing the unwanted weight. On angiogenesis foundation site, I watched a video and one segment showed a mouse that had some kind of obese gene and he was three times as fat as an normal mouse. He went back to the normal weight when given an angiogenesis inhibitor.

Some of my friends are quite overweight. Another friend lost over one hundred pounds (had a surgery) and still has 50 more lbs to go.


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Old 05-29-2016, 08:06 PM   #38
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I care if my love ones are fat. this was my very best friend J in february, we got together for dinner a few months ago. 2 weeks later I gave the Eulogy at her funeral. she was 55 years old, died from a massive heart attack due to obesity. She met her husband at my wedding, she was a bridesmaid and he was a groomsman. We have been friends for 40 years. shared everything.



She struggled with her weight all her life. she left behind so many loved ones, the school she taught at closed on the day of her funeral because so many of the students wanted to attend.

Yes, I most definitely care. 55 is to young to die from a totally preventable issue

I am so sorry for your loss.
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Why do some people care so much that others are fat?
Old 05-29-2016, 08:26 PM   #39
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Why do some people care so much that others are fat?

Whatever people will admit to feeling about fat people, I think that it should be obvious that not only American adults but American children on average are getting much fatter than in years past. And this is not because their families could not afford enough food in the early fifties.

I went to large old suburban grammar school. Neither I nor any of the classmates I am still in contact with remember even one fat boy or girl. In my high school there was one fat boy and no fat girls. When I look at my old class books, no fat boys or girls. In past times societies and governments
wanted to see strong healthy youth. Youth were seen, in my opinion correctly, as the future of the community and nation.

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Old 05-29-2016, 08:52 PM   #40
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I know this is quibbling, but size 4 isn't small, these days. It is more of a medium size. A woman can weigh 135 pounds and wear size 4.

I do agree that a slender or willowy frame seems to be preferred over a robust one, as a beauty ideal for girls and women (not men, though). Because such genes aren't handed out very often, that build seems like something to "aspire" to, possibly via an eating disorder. That could be a separate thread on its own.
Sweet crap on a cracker. What the heck is a size 8 then??
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