Worry

[imoldernu]

Five letters that cover such a big part of life.

No... not a confessional or a poll... Just a few moments to look at what we're about... and maybe to put into perspective the part of our psyche that takes so much energy and produces such mixed results.

Perhaps it has to do more with how we make decisions, which is ultimately good, but the downside is the toll that worry takes on the happiness factor.

Since this is not an advice column, not looking for answers, but simply for your thoughts on the subject. It's something we all deal with.

Here's one website that offers an overview:

https://www.helpguide.org/articles/anxiety/how-to-stop-worrying.htm

 

[REWahoo]

Five letters that cover such a big part of life.

My advice is to not worry about worrying about it.

 

[Gumby]

This is what I think about that.

 

[RobbieB]

I stopped worrying a long time ago. I used to worry about losing my job until it happened and I got a new one. It was easy so I didn't worry anymore.

I used to worry about death. Then I lived though the death of my inlaws, my parents and my wife. I don't worry about that anymore either.

I used to worry about having enough dough. But I've been retired 3 years now and have more dough than I started with so no worries.

I think we worry about the unknown and then when it happens and we work through it it's not so scary anymore.

 

[Meadbh]

Worry is a state of anxiety about real or potential problems. We are all somewhere on the anxiety spectrum. Myself, I do worry about some things (e.g. how I will die) but not about others (what people think of me). My golf game is teaching me that overthinking often backfires. So I try not to do that. In 50 years it won't matter a whit.

 

[imoldernu]

Shortcut for the lucky ones...
Just "+1" this:

 

[pacergal]

I am what my folks called "a worrywart". As an adult, I have used meditation and mindfulness to focus on the positive and deal with what is a realistic worry and I can do something about it, the rest I have learned to let go. I have let go of a lot! Life is much better that way.

 

[Tailgate]

+1 for Alfred... +2 for Jack

 

[MRG]

DW has severe anxiety. She worries enough for ten people. I try to minimize it, but I'm woefully lacking the skills.

 

[bradaz2488]

I would be lying if I said that did not worry at all even when I ER'ed. I have always been a "hope for the best plan for the worst" kind of guy. I do tend to over plan/think things to the n'th degree. Probably due to my past life as an Engineer & project manager. Currently I really only worry about Healthcare costs, Investment choices and out living our money. I know I feel little to no stress since I left the MegaCorp world, but I think a little bit of worry is okay. DW is a fun & spontaneous person so it is a good balance for us and probably helps me not over think things that worry me.. If we were both worriers then that could lead to social or even mental issues if it got too obsessive....

 

[Fedup]

I wonder if this is gender specific. I worry for everybody in the family. My husband doesn't worry. In fact when I was about to deliver the second kid, he said not to worry and sleep on it. Luckily, I didn't listen to him and told him to take me to the hospital. That kid might not be alive otherwise. Yes my kids told me I'm the glue of the family. They are now worry I get sick. Its time to pass the baton.

 

[Cobra9777]

When working at Megacorp, I worried about everything all the time. I guess that was sort-of my job... to anticipate possible future problems and put contingency plans around them. I guess I was pretty good at it, but it took a toll for sure. Very glad I got out when I did. I still worry some, mostly about irrational small stuff, like a few minutes ago I wondered if DD remembered to renew her car registration. I have no idea why my mind decides to conjure up these negative thoughts, but I suspect it's just repeating the processes that were honed over 25 years as the Chief Corporate Worrywart.

 

[ERD50]

When working at Megacorp, I worried about everything all the time. I guess that was sort-of my job... to anticipate possible future problems and put contingency plans around them. I guess I was pretty good at it, but it took a toll for sure. Very glad I got out when I did. I still worry some, mostly about irrational small stuff, like a few minutes ago I wondered if DD remembered to renew her car registration. I have no idea why my mind decides to conjure up these negative thoughts, but I suspect it's just repeating the processes that were honed over 25 years as the Chief Corporate Worrywart.

Sounds a lot like me. Worrying can be stressful, but it also helps one to avoid worse stress - like not renewing the registration and getting stopped by a cop on your way to an important, timely event.

I try to follow the mantra "Worry about nothing, but be concerned about the things that are important", but it doesn't always work for me.

-ERD50

 

[ShokWaveRider]

I only worry about one thing Period. Whether I will be able to afford Healthcare in the years to come.

 

[razztazz]

I have always tended to be a worrier overall and I know exactly why. When I was growing up all the people who were responsible for things were lazy incompetents who couldn't see 5 minutes into the future and always had their asses caught in a crack. And that mean eventually my ass too.

From the time I was about 9 my M.O. became: Find out what can go wrong then do whatever you can to make sure it doesn't. THEN when it does, because it will anyway, make sure steps have been taken to make sure the effects are nulled out or attenuated to a survivable threshold.

 

[aja8888]

I don't worry about anything as DW handles that for me.

 

[MuirWannabe]

"The whole thing is quite hopeless, so it's no good worrying about tomorrow. It probably won't come."
J.R.R. Tolkien, The Return of the King

 

[meierlde]

Just a comment on worry, humans are know for misjudging risk How Big a Threat Do Terrorists Pose to Americans? - The Big Picture In the Uk the recent fire has apparently killed twice as many folks as the 3 terrorist attacks combined. Note the numbers that americans have a 1 in 98 lifetime chance of suicide, but only a 1 in 249 chance of murder. Since telling bad news is the way the media gets eyes on the adds which is why the media exist, we only hear the bad news.

Of course we also need to keep in mind that we are not going to get out of life alive.
Actually I have a bad case of apocalypse fatigue. As a freshman in college I attend seminars where the various professors told us about the various ways we were going to die.

 

[Luck_Club]

I have always tended to be a worrier overall and I know exactly why. When I was growing up all the people who were responsible for things were lazy incompetents who couldn't see 5 minutes into the future and always had their asses caught in a crack. And that mean eventually my ass too.

From the time I was about 9 my M.O. became: Find out what can go wrong then do whatever you can to make sure it doesn't. THEN when it does, because it will anyway, make sure steps have been taken to make sure the effects are nulled out or attenuated to a survivable threshold.

+1
Worry lead to planning which lead to an early out.

My wife and I are dumbfounded by the quantity of last minute sallies without a plan, we come accross. The other day I went to an estate planning free seminar type thing. I was looking to see if I could glean any gems of free information, along with a free sandwich.

I ran into a friend's wife who was also in attendance. I was a bit surprised they didn't even have a will yet. They have two kids with 1 heading to college next fall and he is almost 60.

 

[Morricol61]

I don't tend to worry about much, but I do pay attention to the important stuff and deal with it, or put plans in place to minimise the effects, should the worst happen.

For example:
Keeping insurance policies up to date, hard copies filed and electronic copies saved to my phone.
Putting household bills onto a spike file in date order and paying by the due date.
Our Wills are updated from time to time and the kids have copies and know where to find the originals.
Maintaining a healthy diet, walking daily.
I don't smoke and only drink alcohol occasionally.

My husband is in poor health but I seldom worry about him because he takes his pills and sees the doctor as needed and the rest is out of my control. I'd love it if he'd stop smoking but again, it's out of my control so why worry.

If we aren't careful we could lose all our money but I am careful and have contingency plans in place, should the worst happen.

I know everything will go to sh*t if anything happens to me because I pretty much run the household, keep on top of the bills and make sure we attend social events and appointments etc on time but if I am that bad then my DH will have to pick up the slack. That could be a worry, come to think of it.

 

[dtbach]

I used to worry a lot, but then it turned out to be Depression. So now I try not to worry so that I don't kick off another round of Depression. Now that I have a reasonable AA that I can sleep well at night, I don't worry at all.

My mother worried all the time, and it didn't do her any good. She passed away with plenty of money. Now my wife worries even though I try to show her we have plenty to get by with.

Worry. It's one of the worst traits in humans. . .

 

[Gumby]

I take my cue from the USMC -- improvise, adapt and overcome. It has worked well for the first 58 years of my life. I expect it will suffice for the remainder. No need to worry.

 

[Katiek]

I think how much you worry is part of your personality. I tend to be a worrier (and, consequently, a planner). One of my sisters doesn't worry at all = which causes me to worry.

 

[MRG]

I wonder how much I'll worry when I'm dead?

 

[Car-Guy]

DW has severe anxiety. She worries enough for ten people. I try to minimize it, but I'm woefully lacking the skills.

I don't worry about anything as DW handles that for me.

+1