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Old 11-26-2015, 10:54 AM   #21
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Yes, take trips your DW would have no interest in taking. My suggestion is to do interesting things such as volunteer for an archeological dig through your university, take a Road Scholar trip (you can often find a traveler in the group to share a room with if the single supplement is too expensive). Perhaps your place of worship has places where a volunteer would be useful, wrap travel around that experience. People who are busy doing are rarely lonely.
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Old 11-26-2015, 11:00 AM   #22
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Another thing that works for us - DW is not into road trips like I am. So I drive while she flies. I leave Az for Il about a week before she does. She stays the week there with friends. I spend the week driving and pick them up at the airport in Chicago.
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Old 11-26-2015, 11:02 AM   #23
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I know several couples who have different interests and take some solo trips and some trips together. They are confident people with a high level of trust in their partners. But it wouldn't work for needy, dependent couples.
Not sure which camp we are in, if, in fact, needy, dependent couples are a separate group from those that are confident and trust their spouse, but we take occasional trips separately and it works well.

Last month, DW went to California for a sister's birthday bash for a week while I stayed behind to do some Fall house chores. I take an annual trip to a car enthusiast event while she stays behind. Occasional trips alone work for us and it gives us the alone time we need away from each other.
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Old 11-26-2015, 11:18 AM   #24
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If you need her income to FIRE, you are not ready to FIRE...
That better not be true or I'm so screwed...

Actually we could survive on just my assets, but DW started work much later than I and has a nice gov't pension coming in a few more years so there's a pretty strong incentive for her to work a few more years. I guess we'll just have to see how the asymmetric retirement goes.
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Old 11-26-2015, 12:02 PM   #25
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Wow quite a variety of thoughts here. As some follow up, my wife has no desire to quit work. She is a nurse for the public school system and only works 180 days a year. We do have 2 trips planned so far this coming year one to Florida and the other to Arizona. The intent is for those trips when she is working and I feel antsy. Thanks for the comments
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Old 11-26-2015, 12:28 PM   #26
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DW and I have been married 45 yrs and are both family oriented types. Yet we both have always enjoyed some traveling and activities on our own. We've been fully FIRE'd for about a decade.

Her - Visits a girlfriend in Maine for 1 - 2 weeks every year. They taught school together for decades and are kindred spirits who have a ton of fun together. DW has also visited siblings out of state on her own. Once she went on vacation with our son and grand kids and I stayed home and took care of the pets. I enjoyed the week to myself!

Me - We have a small camper and have been spending 10 -12 dispersed weeks on the road every year. I go to club gatherings (2 - 3 days typical) alone when DW doesn't feel like it or is tied up with something else. I think she'd go alone sometimes too but doesn't feel comfortable driving the truck while towing or handling the mechanics of the camper. I go on fishing trips with some buddies most years without DW. And like others here on the board, I traveled internationally, gone about 3 weeks at a time, on business for a few years and DW was a trooper about that.

I don't think either of us could handle a spouse that objected to a bit of travel independence.
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Old 11-26-2015, 12:38 PM   #27
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I traveled solo a lot when I was widowed and I enjoy it. We travel together but we also do a few separate trips . His usually involve football or camping . My trips are usually spent visiting my family but I do manage to do some side explorations . Most of the trips are a week .
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Old 11-26-2015, 06:16 PM   #28
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I traveled a lot internationally when I worked and have done a few solo trips since - cruises, hiking peru for 2 weeks with the girls, visiting my daughter. But honestly I don't enjoy them with out DH. I'd rather be on the couch with him than any where else
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Old 11-27-2015, 08:30 AM   #29
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I traveled a lot internationally when I worked and have done a few solo trips since - cruises, hiking peru for 2 weeks with the girls, visiting my daughter. But honestly I don't enjoy them with out DH. I'd rather be on the couch with him than any where else
+1..(not that I have designs on your husband y'unnerstand.)
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Old 11-27-2015, 08:48 AM   #30
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..........Me - We have a small camper and have been spending 10 -12 dispersed weeks on the road every year..... .
Small camper here, too. I take four or five 4-day/3-night trips a year in the middle of the week when the weather is nice while DW is still teaching school. That way we still have our weekends together, I avoid the campground weekend crowds and I get to go where I want and explore. Often we return to spots I've scoped out for a later longer trip together, once school is out.
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Old 11-28-2015, 07:05 AM   #31
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DH and I have been together 25 years. I'm working, he isn't. He took off for two months last summer for a Europe and Central Asia road trip, a month this summer to the west coast, and a few weeks in Chile back in February. I don't mind a bit. It is nice for him to get to see and do things that I'm not able to do right now with work. We do enjoy traveling together, and will be going together to England in March. And we've spent an inordinate amount of time traveling together, lol, sometimes in less than ideal conditions.

Everyone has a different relationship, and no one way is the right way.
Whatever works for you, works for you. We take trips as they come, solo or together, but rarely pass up the chance to do something out of our comfort zone.
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Old 11-28-2015, 07:28 AM   #32
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I took a solo rode trip out west a couple of months ago. I really enjoyed it. Lot's of hiking and photo shooting. I did have a couple of stops along the way visiting family, but the majority of the trip was alone. But being a single guy, traveling alone is not unusual to me.
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Old 11-28-2015, 08:00 AM   #33
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I've never really traveled solo--I wonder if I would like it. I do like being alone, but there's no reason to travel w/o DH, both of us being retired, and he would want to see whatever I thought would be interesting. I don't think he is interested in traveling solo himself.

DH and I have traveled without each other but always with other family or friends or coworkers, which is not the same thing.
+1

When I traveled alone, it was always for business. The same with my wife. My wife has taken many leisure trips without me when I was still busy working or when she wanted to go places I did not care to, but she was traveling with friends or relatives.

We have been together since we were 20. Before that, I was in school and never had the money to do much, whether by myself or not. It was the same with my wife. So, we have not traveled for leisure by ourselves.

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I know several couples who have different interests and take some solo trips and some trips together. They are confident people with a high level of trust in their partners. But it wouldn't work for needy, dependent couples.
We both traveled for business when working, so trust was never the isue. But for us, traveling alone is not fun, compared to having a companion. It does not have to be your spouse, and can be a friend or a relative. Of course, if it is a friend of the opposite sex, it will raise an eyebrow.
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Old 11-28-2015, 08:05 AM   #34
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Come to think of it, we both do not like to travel alone, though we think of ourselves as introverted type. And for traveling companionship, we do not always agree, but can tolerate each other much better than a friend or a relative. So, we are stuck with each other.
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Old 11-28-2015, 09:02 AM   #35
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I took a solo rode trip out west a couple of months ago. I really enjoyed it. Lot's of hiking and photo shooting. I did have a couple of stops along the way visiting family, but the majority of the trip was alone. But being a single guy, traveling alone is not unusual to me.
This is what I think of for the term "traveling solo"--both the journey and the destination are for the most part without companions known to me. I know I would love having experiences all by myself, but the middle-child in me would always then want to turn to someone else to share them with.

Solo travel like this probably won't be happening for me but I love reading others' stories about it so hope they post some travel threads about it!
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Old 11-28-2015, 09:29 AM   #36
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would always then want to turn to someone else to share them with.
OT: This was one of the (many) things that hit me when my late wife died.....all the shared memories were gone.

Sure, I can relate experiences to others, but never again can I say "Hey, doesn't that remind you of.......")

Thankfully DW and I are building up quite a collection of our own.

/OT
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Old 11-28-2015, 10:04 AM   #37
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I haven't spung it on her yet, but I'm thinking I'll linger in the EU after dropping DW off at the airport; I want to learn more about how to sail, and she's not interested.

And my little OT...Nemo, I just booked air to St Martin on miles...nonstop from Charlotte! Just the night before.
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Old 11-28-2015, 10:10 AM   #38
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And my little OT...Nemo, I just booked air to St Martin on miles...nonstop from Charlotte! Just the night before.
We're still on...booked into the Joshua Rose Guest House the day before sailing!
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Old 11-28-2015, 11:45 AM   #39
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OT: This was one of the (many) things that hit me when my late wife died.....all the shared memories were gone.

Sure, I can relate experiences to others, but never again can I say "Hey, doesn't that remind you of.......")

Thankfully DW and I are building up quite a collection of our own.

/OT

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Old 11-28-2015, 12:46 PM   #40
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I travelled solo a lot before I got married. My DH had big plans for traveling when he retired, but then he decided that he wanted to focus on tennis instead (when he does something, that's all he does). If I want to travel, I go by myself or with my mom.

Occasionally he goes off to a tennis tournament for a few days or we go off to a big tournament together. This year we went to the US Open and while he watched tennis, I wandered around NYC. Last year we went to the Robert's Cup and next year we're going to the French Open. It would be more fun, if he would go with me, but if I want to travel, this is the way that works. Now and then I hold my breath, stomp my feet and demand that he do something with me. I have to ignore the first day of bellyaching, but then he has fun.
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