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-   -   Saving to spend (http://www.early-retirement.org/forums/f29/saving-to-spend-22685.html)

kz 08-16-2006 12:54 PM

Saving to spend
 
I have to admit I've always had a problem with this concept. I'm a born saver who convulses when she has to spend $$. It's not that I don't buy things that are needed, I do. I just find (found) it hard to spend money on what I consider trivial things.

But things are a changing!! Every since hubby retired last yr the money has been flying out the window. Well, not exactly, but sometimes I still find it hard to breathe. And today I finally made peace with myself and decided that it is quite okay to go ahead and spend some of it. What the heck am I saving it for anyway??

So, taking a clue from Rich in Tampa I went ahead and bought that 3 diamond ring that I've had my heart set on for sometime. I even went so far as to buy the larger of the two that I was considering.

A few days ago I took hubby to see the two rings that I was trying to decide between. I told him the practical side of me was leaning towards the smaller one while the "want to show off a little" side of me was leaning towards the 2x larger one. As usual he smiled and said "Get the one you really want". Followed by, "Sometimes ya just gotta live a little". What a guy!

Today I did something just for me. I bought the "show off a little" one (which is soooo unlike me) and I'm sitting here smiling. I can't wait until my daughter-in-law stops by later to see it. She was after me to get the nicer one. She'll be so impressed that I did something just for me AND I spent some money!!

I'm feeling good!!

Scrooge 08-16-2006 01:52 PM

Re: Saving to spend
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by kz
She'll be so impressed that I did something just for me AND I spent some money!!

I'm feeling good!!

As long as you are under your personalized SWR, do whatever makes you feel good and be happy. Just make sure that "the money [that] has been flying out the window" is the money you can afford to live without 20 years from now ;)

Rich_by_the_Bay 08-16-2006 03:15 PM

Re: Saving to spend
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by kz
So, taking a clue from Rich in Tampa I went ahead and bought that 3 diamond ring that I've had my heart set on for sometime. I even went so far as to buy the larger of the two that I was considering.

That's a pretty cute story. While I will never understand "the diamond thing" completely, happy is happy. Enjoy.

By way of follow-up, I gave my DW the diamond ring over this past weekend. Grandkids were visiting and I gave it to my little granddaughter to give to Grandma. My wife was speechless and got all watery. Then I got a big hug and, when we were finally alone, a bigger... uh... hug.

It was wonderful. Special. Worth it.

Dreamer 08-16-2006 03:47 PM

Re: Saving to spend
 
Good to hear both of your stories. Sometimes you do have to do some things to make yourself happy.

KZ, you sound like me and your DH sounds like my DH!

shiny 08-16-2006 04:05 PM

Re: Saving to spend
 
Like you, kz (and Dreamer), I think I might have just as hard a time spending the allocated money as some do saving money. But... I think it is great when someone who doesn't buy things all the time does buy something and is really happy about it. That is worth it!

Mach1 08-18-2006 08:39 AM

Re: Saving to spend
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Cut-Throat
I think knowing what to spend your money on is a harder discipline than actually saving it in the first place. Money saved is totally worthless - It's just a number on a piece of paper. It's not until you spend it until it has any value at all.

Well put.

Kitty 08-19-2006 04:15 PM

Re: Saving to spend
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Cut-Throat
Congrats on the ring! -

I think knowing what to spend your money on is a harder discipline than actually saving it in the first place. Money saved is totally worthless - It's just a number on a piece of paper. It's not until you spend it until it has any value at all.

Balance and Priorities. 8)

Hmmmm, yup I have had a problem with this lately, keep thinking I am spending to much when in fact I am not. This retired living takes some getting used to.

I like it though, nice to make your own schedule, and not to have to answer to anybody. Freedom at last. ;D

Alan 08-19-2006 04:43 PM

Re: Saving to spend
 
I wish my Dad knew how to spend some money to improve his life a little. He is 81 and has great difficulty walking. (70 years a heavy smoker, and 42 years down a coal mine is hard on a body). He lives in northern England, in the same house he has lived in for 46 years. (my mother, his wife of 32 years died 10 years ago).

He lives very frugally (apart from the smoking, drinking and gambling) and has few financial needs (owns the house valued at $150k plus about $10K in rainy day funds) and enough pension and benefits coming in for living. He recently received an award from a class action lawsuit for people that are suffering from "white finger" caused by operating vibrating machines like jack hammers for hours every day. The award is about $13K and my sisters and myself have tried suggesting that he replaces his coal fire with a gas fire and "comby" boiler that produces hot water on demand and his high, ancient bath tub with a walk-in shower (total cost about $6K). His fire is the only means of obtaining hot water and the bathtub (installed in 1969 when we finally got running water and a toilet inside the house - I was 14 yrs old at the time).

But he will have none of it, because "I can manage just fine, stop fussing about me".

The gas fire would save him having to go outside to fetch coals plus he wouldn't have to put on a fire during the heat wave the country has been having this summer. I guess a lifetime's habits are hard to break.

astromeria 08-19-2006 10:13 PM

Re: Saving to spend
 
Perhaps fulfilling that duty and getting that exercise keeps him going--not to mention the hope of winning at gambling ;)

Alan 08-20-2006 06:06 AM

Re: Saving to spend
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by astromeria
Perhaps fulfilling that duty and getting that exercise keeps him going--not to mention the hope of winning at gambling* ;)

It is actually the company he likes because these days as it is often one of his family members that humps coal for him and cleans out the fire. It's the old high bath tub that we really want him to change.

astromeria 08-20-2006 07:33 AM

Re: Saving to spend
 
Ah, perhaps he's not only concerned about "wasting" his money but also that people won't come if he doesn't need favors any more.

Alan 08-20-2006 08:55 AM

Re: Saving to spend
 
He definitely wants the company so we can understand the need for a fire (plus he has never known life without one).

He is similar to my wife's father (also in his 80's) in that spending on little luxuries to improve life seems to be such a sin even though they have gobs of money.* FIL stills insists on turning off the TV at the switch every time they are not actually using it to save electricity even though MIL is disabled and has great difficulty getting to the TV to turn it on rather using the remote if he would just allow that device to be on standby.* I've even done all the calculations for him showing that even if they had the TV off for 16 hours / day he would only be saving $4 / year (although MIL watches it a lot for cricket, tennis, soccer etc during the day).

I would like to think that we won't be so self sacrificing to save money in our twighlight years.

Nords 08-20-2006 10:51 AM

Re: Saving to spend
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Alan
FIL stills insists on turning off the TV at the switch every time they are not actually using it to save electricity...

I'll trade you for my FIL. He leaves the TV on so that the electron gun doesn't go through too many life-shortening voltage cycles.

Of course he's explained this concept to our teenager, who's broadened the application to include every electricity-consuming device in our entire household.

Never mind that he learned this principle on 1960s-era B&W CRTs...

kcowan 08-20-2006 12:54 PM

Re: Saving to spend
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Nords
I'll trade you for my FIL.* He leaves the TV on so that the electron gun doesn't go through too many life-shortening voltage cycles.*

Of course he's explained this concept to our teenager, who's broadened the application to include every electricity-consuming device in our entire household.

Never mind that he learned this principle on 1960s-era B&W CRTs...

Our teenager (now 33) learned about leaving everything on all by himself. We used to laugh when we returned home after he had gone out. We could trace his route based on lights and TVs/radios being left on. At least it confused would-be thieves...

My wife and I are opposites here. I leave lights on if there is a possibility that I will return within the hour. She shuts everything out even if she is back in in 5 minutes (except the computer - I won that one, but she always closes the open windows).

When we leave the cats alone at night, I turn everything out. She wants to leave lights on for the cats. ::)

Scrooge 08-20-2006 07:52 PM

Re: Saving to spend
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Nords
Never mind that he learned this principle on 1960s-era B&W CRTs...

This is a perfect opportunity to introduce your teenager to the notion that certain ideas, although perfectly valid at some point in time, can become inapplicable or even counterproductive later on.

Of course, you will then have to explain to her why the stuff that was valid when you were growing up and that you are trying to teach her now is still applicable* ;)

Nords 08-20-2006 10:55 PM

Re: Saving to spend
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Scrooge
This is a perfect opportunity to introduce your teenager to the notion that certain ideas, although perfectly valid at some point in time, can become inapplicable or even counterproductive later on.
Of course, you will then have to explain to her why the stuff that was valid when you were growing up and that you are trying to teach her now is still applicable* ;)

"Uh, Mom, I'd rather ask you than Dad-- I don't want to know that much about it..."

Arc 09-09-2006 03:34 PM

Re: Saving to spend
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Rich_in_Tampa
That's a pretty cute story. While I will never understand "the diamond thing" completely, happy is happy. Enjoy.

By way of follow-up, I gave my DW the diamond ring over this past weekend. Grandkids were visiting and I gave it to my little granddaughter to give to Grandma. My wife was speechless and got all watery. Then I got a big hug and, when we were finally alone, a bigger... uh... hug.

It was wonderful. Special. Worth it.

That's an awful lot to pay for a "bigger ...uh...hug"! Hope you have that built into the budget.


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