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-   -   Time to invest in beer? (http://www.early-retirement.org/forums/f27/time-to-invest-in-beer-39652.html)

aaronc879 10-11-2008 04:42 PM

Time to invest in beer?
 
A friend sent this to me and I thought it'd go over well here.

If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in Delta Airlines one year ago, you will have $49.00 today. If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in AIG one year ago, you will have $33.00 today. If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in Lehman Brothers one year ago, you will have $0.00 today. But, if you had purchased $1,000 worth of beer one year ago, drank all the beer, then turned in the aluminum cans for recycling refund, you will have received $214.00. Based on the above, the best current investment plan is to drink heavily & recycle. It is called the 401-Keg. A recent study found that the average American walks about 900 miles a year. Another study found that Americans drink, on average, 22 gallons of alcohol a year.
That means that, on average, Americans get about 41 miles to the gallon!

Dawg52 10-11-2008 07:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by aaronc879 (Post 730458)
A friend sent this to me and I thought it'd go over well here.

If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in Delta Airlines one year ago, you will have $49.00 today. If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in AIG one year ago, you will have $33.00 today. If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in Lehman Brothers one year ago, you will have $0.00 today. But, if you had purchased $1,000 worth of beer one year ago, drank all the beer, then turned in the aluminum cans for recycling refund, you will have received $214.00. Based on the above, the best current investment plan is to drink heavily & recycle. It is called the 401-Keg. A recent study found that the average American walks about 900 miles a year. Another study found that Americans drink, on average, 22 gallons of alcohol a year.
That means that, on average, Americans get about 41 miles to the gallon!


I get less than a mile per gallon. :p

W2R 10-11-2008 08:19 PM

I don't drink at all, so I get great mileage! I suppose that my miles per gallon would be infinite. :duh:

harley 10-11-2008 08:33 PM

I suspect you are running on some alternate source. Nobody is without vice. >:D

W2R 10-11-2008 08:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by harley (Post 730612)
I suspect you are running on some alternate source. Nobody is without vice. >:D

I don't smoke, drink, or do drugs. But...you are right. Sugar is my vice! I try to avoid it completely, but to no avail.

"My name is W2R, and I am a sugar-holic."

harley 10-11-2008 08:48 PM

Alcohol is just fermented sugars. We're on the same page. It's like the difference between regular and diesel.;D

W2R 10-11-2008 08:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by harley (Post 730625)
Alcohol is just fermented sugars. We're on the same page. It's like the difference between regular and diesel.;D

:2funny: Guess I'm on the road to ruin, then! >:D

Khan 10-11-2008 09:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Want2retire (Post 730600)
I don't drink at all, so I get great mileage! I suppose that my miles per gallon would be infinite. :duh:

Don't drink, don't smoke...

YouTube - Adam Ant - Goody Two Shoes

W2R 10-11-2008 09:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Khan (Post 730637)
Don't drink, don't smoke...

:2funny: Not only that, I divide by zero. Definitely an oddball!

bbbamI 10-11-2008 09:54 PM

I invest in the harder stuff...it doesn't take as long. :p

jambo101 10-12-2008 12:57 PM

Another lesson on beer.
There is always room for beer | Oliver Thylmann's Thoughts


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