Family member theft

[chinaco]

It seems to happen quite a bit.


Family credit card fraud question answered - Sep. 9, 2010


A couple of stories I am familiar with involving mothers and sons.

• I never will forget about the story from friend back when I was getting out of the military. We were discussing our futures since our enlistments were up. I remember commenting that I had been sending allotment checks to my mother during my enlistment to save for college and she had been putting them in a bank account for me. My buddy commented that he had done the same, but he found out his mother spent it "All"! He got the news from his mother over the phone because he was intending to go home and it would be discover it soon enough.

• There was a ne'er do well from high school. Spoiled, got most anything he wanted from his parents. His father passed and his mother received some insurance money. She put it in the bank. He tricked his mother with a ruse and got her to withdraw the funds and somehow got his hands on it and left town. He spent it all!

 

[Badger]

I have a slime ball older brother who was the trustee for my mothers money/investments. After he succeeded in convincing my sister and I that mom should be declared incompetent to handle her finances since she was having failing mental health he then also acquired active power of attorney according to the instructions of the trust.

He then began taking money out of the trust for his own purposes directing it to him, his children, their spouses, his grandchildren as well as to his favorite charities some of which he was associated as a board member.

Once we found out it took a lot of time and lawyers to force him to return a good portion of it although he still made off with many tens of thousands of dollars. At least we stopped him from further embezzelments.

Our parents would have been shocked at his behavior since everything he did was contrary to their expressed wishes which were also clearly written in the trust.

His greed dishonored my parents although I doubt he sees it that way.
Needless to say he is no longer considered family by the rest of us.

You just never know!

 

[Orchidflower]

I had a CPA who inherited a good amount from his grandpa when he died. The father stole all the money donated to both grandsons and made off with it all. The CPA and his sibling didn't find out about it until the father passed. I think these things go on all the time. Sad but true.

When I was a puppy I worked for an attorney who did alot of Wills in family law. He said you see humans at their very worst during death and divorce, and I can see that for sure.

 

[73ss454]

I didn't have any of these problems as there are no brothers no sisters and there was no money. Simple!

 

[chinaco]

...

When I was a puppy I worked for an attorney who did alot of Wills in family law. He said you see humans at their very worst during death and divorce, and I can see that for sure.

I believe it. In settling estates... even if heirs trust one another may not agree on how to handle certain situations.... sometimes even the smallest details.

 

[FIREd]

When his mother died, my dad found out that a lot of money was missing from her accounts. Apparently, my uncle and his family had been fleecing granny for years. My dad and my uncle haven't talked since settling my grandmother's estate.

 

[Walt34]

I saw a lot of that when I was doing fraud investigations, which included identity theft. When family members did it, usually the acts were drug-driven.

One in particular I remember the look on a mother's face when I showed her the ATM photos from the contested withdrawals. It was her son, and she had no idea it had been him.

 

[MichaelB]

I suspect the prevalence of family related fraud is one reason banks are so reluctant to replace or refund money taken unlawfully from accounts, even when banking regulations require them to do so.

 

[Walt34]

The banks will replace the funds, at least the ones I worked with did. But they did reasonably require that the account holder sign an affidavit of forgery/unauthorized withdrawal so the bank could go after the person who did the transaction. Without the affidavit there could be no legal action.

And that was the stumbling block for many families because it meant that they were signing a document that meant a family member could go to jail. In some cases that was impossible for them to do.

 

[haha]

Damn, this is ugly reality isn't it?

Ha

 

[Badger]

The banks will replace the funds, at least the ones I worked with did. But they did reasonably require that the account holder sign an affidavit of forgery/unauthorized withdrawal so the bank could go after the person who did the transaction. Without the affidavit there could be no legal action.

And that was the stumbling block for many families because it meant that they were signing a document that meant a family member could go to jail. In some cases that was impossible for them to do.

Although this wasn't our situation, I would have gladly signed an affidavit and encouraged the bank to pursue having my embezzeling brother thrown in jail had it been. Anyone who is low enough to screw over family loses any claim to be family. They are worse than a stranger who would steal from you because they are also destroying the family bond and trust. I don't understand folks that enable this kind of behavior by not pursuing legal action regardless of whether it is a family member or not.

 

[MichaelB]

The banks will replace the funds, at least the ones I worked with did. But they did reasonably require that the account holder sign an affidavit of forgery/unauthorized withdrawal so the bank could go after the person who did the transaction. Without the affidavit there could be no legal action.

I worked two cases where the banks had to be forced to replenish. One took 6 months, the other 18. My greater surprise was their hostility and uncooperative attitude, which I attribute to a policy of push-back designed to weed out family theft situations.

Damn, this is ugly reality isn't it?

Yeah. Much of it is motivated by addiction. Ugly and heartbreaking.