For those of us raised in extreme dysfunction, the thread was actually comforting in that it proved our family was not the only one with [-]completely screwed up[/-] parents who were [-]aliens from another planet[/-] incapable of having healthy relationships with their children.
I remember watching "Leave it to Beaver", "Father Knows Best", "My Three Sons", etc. and knowing the shows were fake because no one ever had a family like that. When I was about 10 years old I went to a new friend's house and the mom was in the kitchen cooking dinner, the dad was sitting at the kitchen table and they were talking about their day, their children, and just life in general. They laughed at something. They actually liked talking with each other. When the kids came in the kitchen they were acknowledged with a smile and a nod and the parents acted as though they were glad to see them. And the parents even acted as if .... and this was the eye opener.... well, they seem to like having their children around. They even included me in part of the conversation and they seemed to be interested in what I had to say. I remember being stunned that they looked me in the eye and listened to me, didn't interrupt, didn't look bored - they were really interested in me and what I had to say. It was surreal.
While this thread was cleansing to FinanceDude, it was a reminder to me there is a clear difference between family of choice and family of birth. Like FD, I cut my losses when I realized my dad was [-]always going to be an a%#hole[/-] never going to change and I didn't have to put up with his bad behavior. It came down to the fact I would not have been friends with him had we not been family because I would not put up with such [-]crap[/-] behavior from a friend, so why should I tolerate it because of some DNA?
Regrets? I have none. I look at my emotionally happy and healthy family and I know I made the right decision. I know I'm a lot happier.
I'm just glad I was able to time it right and get all five parts of FD's story.
