Name Issues!

[Amethyst]

My parents gave me an unpopular first name. As a youngster, I took so much cr@p about it that I stopped using it, and throughout my teen and adult life have always used my middle name.

On marrying, I adopted my husband's surname. Social Security allowed me to change my name with them to: given middle name, maiden surname, husband's surname. These 3 names (actually first, middle initial and last name) are how I am registered everywhere: work payroll; banks, credit cards, financial institutions; graduate school; memberships; etc.

The only exceptions are the Motor Vehicle Administration and the Department of State. I am required to have all FOUR names (given 1st name, given middle name, and the 2 surnames) on my driver's license and passport. Let's call that name A B C D, and the name I use everywhere else is B C D.

When I renewed my driver's license this year (it's a 5-year renewal period), I was told, for the first time, that because my Social Security number doesn't match A B C D, I can only have a provisional driver's license. The MVA wants me to change my name with Social Security from B C D to A B C D. I fear this will cause uncountable foul-ups with financial accounts and even work payroll, since they use my SSN as identifier.

My only other course appears to be to legally get rid of my first name and then change my name with the MVA and State, so my DL and passport read B C D.

Any lurking snags with this approach? Anyone got any better (practical) ideas?

Thanks,

Amethyst

 

[W2R]

I guess having your name legally changed would work. But you know, no matter WHAT you do it is going to be a mess.

I have a similar problem. I did not go back to my maiden name when I got divorced because I don't like it. In Louisiana, my name is legally A C D (where A is my first name, C is my maiden name, and D is my married name), whether I like it or not. I love my given middle name (B), and would like to sign things (A B D) so I do that anyway. I have stuff as (A B D) and (A C D), which is pretty confusing.

Recently I had to have a document notarized, to change my withdrawal amount from the TSP. The TSP has me as (A B D), but my drivers' license is (A C D). I explained that to the notary and he could care less, because he says that happens all the time here. All he cared about was getting paid.

 

[Katsmeow]

I have had various names on various things without it really causing a lot of problems.

I never liked first name or middle name or maiden name for that matter. Call that A B C. So when I went off to law school where I knew no one I introduced myself at D C with D being a diminutive of A that I actually like. When I got licensed as an attorney I used the initials for A. and B. rather than my actual first name and middle name. It is still that way on my framed license.

When I got married, I loved DH's last name (E) so even though I really strongly believe that women shouldn't be expected to change their last name's to their husband's last name, I changed mine as quick as I could making my maiden name my middle name. So I mostly became A C E but everyone calls me D E. I did strangely enough when I was single and credit cards could still do this receive a Visa card for D C which I kept and used and never corrected. When I got married I tried to correct it and ended up with D C-E which was weird. I finally got that corrected a couple of years ago.

At various times I've thought about changing my first name to D. In my state at least the process is very simple, but so far the various names haven't hurt me. You could check in your state to see how hard it would be to change things.

 

[growing_older]

Depends on your state. The legal process for changing names can be formal or have a more informal process.

 

[Meadbh]

Sheesh! How much does it cost to legally change your name, Amethyst? If this is not expensive, the way I would approach this is to change my name to whatever I really want to be called and communicate the change with all the other agencies.

My parents gave me three first names (ABC) and always used the third one, C, which is a difficult, little known name subject to being mispronounced and misspelt. This caused me distress on a number of occasions when I was younger. Once I got into the working world and got a passport I have consistently used my full list of names as on my birth certificate (ABC) or my initials. When I make new friends and acquaintances, I share with them that my friends and family usually call me C and that they are now welcome to do so too, just so long as they can pronounce it correctly, but if they would prefer to address me as A, that's fine too. I have never felt the need to make any legal changes. I am single, but if I married I would keep my own surname and would expect my spouse to do likewise. Nobody "owns" Meadbh!

 

[JOHNNIE36]

Sounds lke all these names and name changes would present a real problem in Florida when you are trying to renew a drivers license. My wife just went through this. As I remember you need three proofs as to who you are and where you live. The problem is with the woman proving who she really is after going through divorce and remarriage. In some cases, the woman must bring in copies of divorce papers, birth certificates must be original or certified copies, etc. A nightmare for some people. I think this a result of the Patriot Act.

 

[pb4uski]

My father's given first name was french (his parents were french Canadian) but he used the Americanized version his entire adult life. He had his name legally changed when he was in his fifties. As I recall, he the process was fairly simple and straight forward.

 

[Amethyst]

Heavens. Ownership was never at issue. Mr. A would have been glad to get me either way, but his surname was easier to live with. So I took it and never had to deal with "Urrr...is that spelled with an X or a Y??" again. Easier on descendants, you know...plus back then, there weren't so many possessions (accounts) that had to be changed.

A.

S I am single, but if I married I would keep my own surname and would expect my spouse to do likewise. Nobody "owns" Meadbh!

 

[Amethyst]

The name change itself isn't what worries me - it's having to change with 97 different places that use SSN as an identifier. It's all quite ironic, since I don't even qualify for SS...

A.

My father's given first name was french (his parents were french Canadian) but he used the Americanized version his entire adult life. He had his name legally changed when he was in his fifties. As I recall, he the process was fairly simple and straight forward.

 

[Bestwifeever]

I can't think it has to be complicated as people start using different names all the time. Can't you just change it for the MVA or whatever agency brought it up (and are you sure you even need to do that? Ask someone else at that place before proceeding ?)?

Why do all places have to have the same version of your name?

 

[HFWR]

You think you've got problems...

Bill Cosby Thought He Was Jesus Christ - YouTube

 

[Amethyst]

Bwah-hah! but alas, not terribly applicable in this particular case

You think you've got problems...

Bill Cosby Thought He Was Jesus Christ - YouTube

 

[Amethyst]

The MVA wants me to change my name with SS from BCD to ABCD so it will match MVA records. My concern is that everyone else associates my SSN with BCD. Have heard horror stories of people not being able to access funds, records etc. after changing name with SS, since the SSN is basically the National ID Number now. It must be a recent issue, since I renewed my DL in 2007 with no problems.

I guess I should have titled the thread "Have you changed your name with SS recently, and if so, were there unforeseen consequences?"

Amethyst

I can't think it has to be complicated as people start using different names all the time. Can't you just change it for the MVA or whatever agency brought it up (and are you sure you even need to do that? Ask someone else at that place before proceeding ?)?

Why do all places have to have the same version of your name?

 

[Texas Proud]

I am surprised that your state has gone so far with this...

One of my sisters got a divorce and got remarried...

Her name on first marriage was ABCD... went back to ABC, then to ABE... but, the state wanted them all, so she is ABCDE on her license... they did not try and force her to get them all fixed..

 

[Amethyst]

Now that you mention it, I just remembered...the DMV rep informed me that the name rules were there before, and are now being strictly enforced because of so many illegal immigrants moving to MD and applying for DL's. (No political discussions about II's please).

I am surprised that your state has gone so far with this...

One of my sisters got a divorce and got remarried...

Her name on first marriage was ABCD... went back to ABC, then to ABE... but, the state wanted them all, so she is ABCDE on her license... they did not try and force her to get them all fixed..

 

[Sue J]

My parents gave me an unpopular first name.

No advice here, but I have a very common first name for my birth year of 1955. Everywhere I went there were 3 or 4 of us with the same name. I always wanted a unique name!

Unrelated to my all too common first name, I was not given a middle name at birth, so my name was always AB. When I got married I took my husband's surname because I liked it much better than mine and I took my maiden name as my middle name, so I was ABC. I think my SS card said A, middle initial for B, C.

I needed my SS card in 2006 when I started a part time job and I know I had my card at some point and that it was probably in the attic in a box lablelled something like "Important Stuff". I couldn't find the box with the card and an afternoon at the SS office seemed like an easier task than tackling the attic so I got a replacement card with all 3 names ABC.