 Quote:
|
Originally Posted by Nords
Gladwell has reassuring words about kids-- it's not our fault that they turn out the way they do.* Well, actually our "fault", if any, lies in genetics & neighborhoods.* Gladwell quotes Judith Harris' book "The Nurture Assumption" (another excellent read) to show that the majority of kid's influence is environmental, not parental.* The most that we can hope for is to find a neighborhood & schools full of positive role models (peers & adults).* Although we don't have much influence on our own kids (other than providing love, shelter, & food) parents still have to work with neighborhood adults to help keep an eye on nurture each other's kids.
|
Nords: Interesting insights on a number of subjects.
You and I had a conversation about the topic I quoted from your post about a year ago.
Based on my own experience, and also people I have known that were somewhat in the same postion as I was in at the time, couldn't agree more.
My wife and I agreed that we wanted children, and also agreed she would be a stay-at-home mother.
When my kids were 5 and 9 years old, I had a management job, but not making that much money. (This was the 60's). About that time, my widowed mother who was doing the best she could with Soc. Sec. only needed financial help.
I started a side business, and from that day forward, I was a guy that showed up occassionally, but not sure that my kids understood what role I played in their lives.
We enrolled both of them in Catholic schools.
Long story short, they both left home before I had any opportunity to spend a helluva lot of time with them.
My kids turned out to be well adjusted and productive young people (Age 39 and 35 now).
I certainly can't accept much credit for the way they turned out, but no longer feel guilty. 
I obviously agree with your quote.
|