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cashbalancetrouble · 06-09-2008, 07:39 AM

This is never a simple as it may appear. My case involves XW. I helped my son get his first car at 19. X cosigned for college loan at 20 to go after he did not pass in cummunity college. Son only wanted to go to college to be with friends and the grades were the expected. I am now out $4K do to his not listening for 6 months he needed to have timing belt changed and then helping to get the engine replaced. He was to pay me back $100 per month. I have seen nothing in over 6 months and never here from him either. He had to drop out of school this spring because he spent all his loan, $25K+. He has never accepted my advice nor solicted for it. I have finally realized he will have to learn about life on his own. I pray he is safe but can do no more.

My daughter turned down a car at 16 with conditional use and her paying the $25 per month for half of the insurance,(company benefit of DW2). She argued and left to live fulltime with XW. She bought her own $1000 car while still in high school. Only took to months to wreck the front end. i repaired it with parts form junk yard and she paid me back my cost. She got in troble drinking and etc and eventual had to have the car taken away by XW. After getting out of substance clinic she stopped going to school, didn,t graduate from HS. She at least got a job and learned how tough life is without and education. I paid for her english correspondence course so she could graduate. It took 11 months for her to finish this and finnaly this month she graduated. She has another car that she bought for $300. And she paid me for parts to do the front brakes, fix a rear brake line, replace ball joints and tie rod end, replace a broken trailing arm over the first 9 months she owned it. She has completed two clasees at Cummunity College and did it all on her own. BUT I GET THE MONEY FIRST! This morning it is off to look at the car again as soon as I am done here. Broken down at the grocery store with shredded front tire, etc.

I can say these are two different children. Both started out very disrespectful. The gifts to the first did not teach as well as the just the simple support of the second.

I wish you all the best. It will never be easy and you will always second guess your self... and as above, wake up at night.

06-09-2008, 07:39 AM	#13
cashbalancetrouble Recycles dryer sheets Join Date: May 2008 Posts: 127	This is never a simple as it may appear. My case involves XW. I helped my son get his first car at 19. X cosigned for college loan at 20 to go after he did not pass in cummunity college. Son only wanted to go to college to be with friends and the grades were the expected. I am now out $4K do to his not listening for 6 months he needed to have timing belt changed and then helping to get the engine replaced. He was to pay me back $100 per month. I have seen nothing in over 6 months and never here from him either. He had to drop out of school this spring because he spent all his loan, $25K+. He has never accepted my advice nor solicted for it. I have finally realized he will have to learn about life on his own. I pray he is safe but can do no more. My daughter turned down a car at 16 with conditional use and her paying the $25 per month for half of the insurance,(company benefit of DW2). She argued and left to live fulltime with XW. She bought her own $1000 car while still in high school. Only took to months to wreck the front end. i repaired it with parts form junk yard and she paid me back my cost. She got in troble drinking and etc and eventual had to have the car taken away by XW. After getting out of substance clinic she stopped going to school, didn,t graduate from HS. She at least got a job and learned how tough life is without and education. I paid for her english correspondence course so she could graduate. It took 11 months for her to finish this and finnaly this month she graduated. She has another car that she bought for $300. And she paid me for parts to do the front brakes, fix a rear brake line, replace ball joints and tie rod end, replace a broken trailing arm over the first 9 months she owned it. She has completed two clasees at Cummunity College and did it all on her own. BUT I GET THE MONEY FIRST! This morning it is off to look at the car again as soon as I am done here. Broken down at the grocery store with shredded front tire, etc. I can say these are two different children. Both started out very disrespectful. The gifts to the first did not teach as well as the just the simple support of the second. I wish you all the best. It will never be easy and you will always second guess your self... and as above, wake up at night.