Thank you, P.S., for the compliment. If only my students cared a little about writing, too.
Shawn: I’d probably have just the same mixed feelings as I do today, though I suspect the dismay would fade into relief over time.
Rich: For me, leaving would be an irrevocable and permanent decision to retire. I do not believe I’d work again in any sort of position unless I was forced to out of sheer hunger, etc.
Sue: Thank you for your insights and expressions of understanding. Shall I presume you are or were an academic yourself?
Milton: It’s not that I require an artificial structure, it’s that the job provides opportunities that are difficult to realize given purely-personal resources. For example, I mentioned a “space shuttle ride” (not literally) sort of possibility that may be coming up for me at work. It wouldn’t be impossible to do something like it on my own, but it would be far, far more difficult and extremely expensive (as well as self-indulgent without more than a merely personal goal at its core). That, and the possibilities to travel on the job, to have an impact on the next generation, etc., make staying tempting if not bearable.
One of your points is that any job-related B.S. is too much B.S., and that any self-actualizing individual with the basic means and balls to retire early would therefore do so. I’m most of the way there with you, but some B.S. may be worth putting up with if the job offers some unique benefits.
All: The biggest problem I face at work is not routine politics and paperwork, it’s the crushing blow to my naïve view of academia that I’ve suffered. These views were darned important to me, and their passing has been a tremendous loss. Through foolishly-noble and romantic intent, I’ve invested so much based on these views. Though I can’t regain my naïveté, and I can’t reform the system nor can I “win” against it, I yearn for a way to move forward with a clear new path. Without that, my own integrity must to do futile daily battle against a stiff and cold head-wind.
Of course, if I can’t resolve this dilemma, I count myself fortunate in that I can make early retirement my “clear new path.”