Hi...I'm new...thoughts on downsizing to make retirement possible

[maxer]

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A question for others. Did your dissatisfaction with your life as it was come on rather suddenly? Honestly, I was doing OK until about 6 weeks ago...maybe it's because I have done the math and know we can do this? I am not a rash person by any means, so I am a bit surprised by my strong feelings that it is time to move on!

I'm no expert but speaking to an extent from personal experience and observations, there comes a time in a persons "career", "profession" or "job" when money or that "sale" as a sense of accomplishment doesn't quite cut it. It is an indication of a combination of factors coming together - age, boredom, impatience, burnout and feeling of lack of excitement - it is here that you have reached a point where you feel you have become about the best that you can be at what you do. There is no more mystery, excitement of the chase or the curiosity - it has all become somewhat predictable, mechanical and uninteresting.

Asking the question "does it have to be this way?" prompts people to look for that alternate. Realizing that the alternate has a risk, prompts one to look for some sense of security and for the seniors or ER's, financial security is probably the first step. Once one realizes that the financial security has been reasonably taken care of, it lifts a huge burden. It reinforces the conscious thought about alternates and takes up a lot more of ones thinking time which is just as well - thats self examination.

You are now admitting to yourself - Yes, I may be ready to retire!

[sweetana3]

I think the word "retire" has as much emotion behind it as "I do". We all have a picture in our heads of those we know or knew who were retired and carry that emotional picture with us.

My parents and inlaws are pretty happy and busy in retirement. I have very specific plans on volunteer training and volunteer work to keep me happy and busy. Cant wait for the very first opportunity to say "good bye" to those stuck at work.

[LBSuarez]

[quote=sweetana3;546337]I think the word "retire" has as much emotion behind it as "I do". We all have a picture in our heads of those we know or knew who were retired and carry that emotional picture with us.

This is a very interesting perspective that I hadn't thought about before. No doubt there's lots of emotion along with the uncertainty of "can I?" and "should I?".

I don't think that I'm actually picturing anyone but myself, but me sort of reinvented, not sure how, but different? More relaxed, and time for fun and the time and energy to try new things. I think that there is a different me yet to come out, but too many responsibilities and pressures have kept "me" from emerging...maybe I'll be disappointed, and be no different than I've been for many years, but I sure would like to try! It's not that I don't like who I am, just interested to find another side that might be waiting to come out I guess. I think that habits are too ingrained where we live now, and doubt that a real change would happen without changing locations. We have no relatives in this area, and the chance is less than 1% our children would ever return to live here.
My husband seems to be more afraid of a major change than I am, and I'm the more reserved and careful one of the two of us about most things. Anyone have encouraging thoughts that I could share with him about downsizing and moving to a new and less expensive area? I honestly think I'd be perfectly happy in a house half the size that we have, and a third the value! Will I be sad to leave it? Yes, but also excited!
Thanks everyone. Sorry I think I got off track here, didn't I?

[ajs56]

[quote=LBSuarez;546573]

Quote:

Originally Posted by sweetana3 I think that there is a different me yet to come out, but too many responsibilities and pressures have kept "me" from emerging...maybe I'll be disappointed, and be no different than I've been for many years, but I sure would like to try! It's not that I don't like who I am, just interested to find another side that might be waiting to come out I guess.

Sweetana,

I think this is Very true for me as well. Sometimes we lose sight of the forest for the trees, and get into a certain mode of thinking or rut, even if it is a good or pleasant rut. The responsibilities of earning a living, raising a family, etc., require a substantial time and energy committment, leaving little time/energy for "dreaming" or thinking outside the box. Once family/financial responsibilities are lessened, I think it takes some effort to re-kindle the "what are the possibilities" type of thinking I had a lot more of when I was young. But they're there, and I plan to fan the embers and see what happens.

As I've been saying to my DW in our FIRE discussions, "I don't know exactly what I'll do next, but I have this feeling that it will be better than anything so far."

Well, here's to looking forward, onward and upward!

[LBSuarez]

AJS56...that was actually me talking, not Sweetana...I'm so new to this that I probably incorrectly captured a quote or something. I can't tell you how reassuring that it is to read that your thoughts are similar to mine in this process that has sort of caught me by surprize! Thank you.
I am still learning about how this whole site works, so fumbling around not sure how to take full advantage of it, but really enjoy it so far.
One more question before I leave on vacation early tomorrow morning...What are the dryer sheets all about? It makes me laugh, but I figure there's some meaning to it that escapes me...either that or it is totally random!
Thanks everyone...I'll be back in a few weeks...LBSuarez

[ajs56]

LB,

Thanks for setting that straight. Not sure how the quote got mixed up, I'm fairly new here too.

I hope to "reinvent" myself to some extent as you say, pursuing some music/writing/photography interests, which will be a drastic change from my career as an acountant/manager. I'm not planning on relocating as you mentioned, but I suspect some family and friends will view my whole ER and "artistic" pursuits as some sort of midlife crisis I'm going thru. That used to bother me a little, but hearing/talking with folks on these boards has helped that go away.

Like you, I am a little uncertain exactly what the future holds, but it's exciting to have a fairly open book, waiting for the next chapter to be written.

Have a great vacation.

[CourtneyC]

I would agree with jnojr. Most noncompete clauses are unenforceable or are not practical for the company to enforce through a suit.

[LBSuarez]

I can't quite believe that this is happening, but on our way back from our vacation at the family cottage we (at my husband's suggestion) took a different route home to visit our daughter who is in graduate school outside of Pittsburgh, and living in a town we are somewhat familiar with as we bought a house for her to live in with other students while in their Physician Assistant Program. We already knew that Real Estate was way less expensive there, and had set up an appointment with a Realtor to get a better overview of the market while there. Things weren't looking very positive, and I thought my husband and I would never agree on city or country, when right at the end our agent told us about a FSBO we were passing. She arranged for us to see it, and suddenly things went together, and we are buying a house about 9 hours away...very excited...and will be crazy busy preparing our present home for sale! This may not be a permanent move, but a place to discover new things about ourselves, as well as the area...oh, and the house in a lovely city neighborhood is about 1/3 the price of what we'd pay in our area for the same house!
We are on our way...thanks everyone for your encouragement...not sure it is truly retirement, but at least we will be taking a break and figuring out how we want to spend the rest of our lives...and spending a whole lot less money while doing it! We know that we won't see our daughter often...she has her own life, of course...which is mostly studying or attending classes about 18 hours a day, but maybe I'll even have the time to cook her a nice meal on the weekends?
Will keep you posted...I think this is going to be terribly difficult in some ways, but I am also very invigorated with the idea of change!

[BigBob]

Quote:

Originally Posted by LBSuarez What are the dryer sheets all about? It makes me laugh, but I figure there's some meaning to it that escapes me...either that or it is totally random! Thanks everyone...I'll be back in a few weeks...LBSuarez

You can find more info here: "What's the deal with the dryer sheets?!?"

[msully76]

Hi,

I am 53 and getting ready to retire in the next couple of years. We live in a 2600 sq ft house with 4 full brms and 4 full baths and are considering a condo of 1600 sq ft. and we are very nervous. I am glad to see that it worked for you. What was the biggest adjustment?

[FinanceDude]

Quote:

Originally Posted by LBSuarez Thanks all of you for making me feel so welcome. We did consult attorneys concerning the Non-compete clause (not with the downsizing employer, but with the next job with a horrid boss my husband took because we had two kids in private college at the time)..we know that the clause is not enforceable, BUT no employer wants/wanted to take a chance of having a new employee involved in a lawsuit...everyone knows what kind of person his old boss is, so they knew there would be a lawsuit...win or lose, it could have been a mess.

Not always the cause, unfortunately...........

[Rambler]

For DW, the desire to FIRE was a lot earlier than mine. However, her desire was because of my 14 hour days, every day, year-in and year-out. She would not really like to be a widow...

As of earlier this year, we hit the mark that has been our goal for a long time: FI and be able to RE at 45 even if I chose to w*rk longer. However, that may also have meant we had to sell the dream home we built a couple years back. We don't live there now as we are on assignment in Asia. As of this time last year, I was saying I wanted to keep at it for 5 more years. Now its different. The j*b is usually interesting, but very stessful.

Since early this year when we figured out we would be OK to FIRE if it came to that, I have been progressively been less able to focus on the day to day grind, as w*rk has become more complicated with our new "matrix" organization, meaning I have about 9 or 10 bosses (lost count). Having my comp tied to the share price of mega-corp doesn't help with the current market situation...

We have a daughter still in HS, and began counting the days to FIRE (about 560) when she graduates. Until then, we check the number every few days.

Most of the people I work with now are great people (had to get rid of a few over the past year, costing megacorp millions of $$$ in severence payments), but the real bummer here is that most that I had to get rid of were those the "big boss" didn't like, and I see them retiring on what they got, and me having to stick it out to earn my FIRE. Sometimes I just wish I would get pushed out the door for a big severence like that, but I won't do anything un-ethical just to get the shove.

I'm rambling (hence "Rambler"), but the desire to FIRE sometimes goes "bang" and sometimes comes on over time. In my case, it was kind of a small "bang" and then a gathering rumble...kind of like the earthquakes we have here...

Rambler

[kumquat]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rambler Having my comp tied to the share price of mega-corp doesn't help with the current market situation...

All of it, or just the 'Employee Stock Option Program'? I made out like a bandit because of options but the base was always there (although bonus was share price and profit related). If my base was tied to company stock, I probably wouldn't have stayed 3 years much less 20+ years (and won the lottery in the last 5).

[Rambler]

Base is fixed...but the lucrative part is the bonus...it is a scheme that was supposed to replace the stock options, based on the stock price improvement, and it worked out really well last year...made out like a bandit as well. This year was looking great too!!! ...until July, when the stock started its free-fall. Our stock is considered a bellweather...gets real bad if there is possibility of recession...even when the results are great. We'll see what happens. Will still be set to FIRE in 2009 due to some other golden handcuffs in the form of a loyalty program...that expires end of next year.

Rambler

[kumquat]

Sooner or later you'll have another few good years and make out like a bandit again. Of course, if you're about to ER ..........