Hi, I'm Sarah

[SarahW]

I'm married, live in Texas and considering taking early retirement next year...maybe. I'm a confirmed "security junkie" and the decision to take early retirement has been a hand-wringer. My husband is not planning to retire for a few more years and we are very financially sound so I don't need to work. I just have a difficult time letting go of the security of my job. I am a professional woman with 26 years at a major corporation. Should I go? Should I stay?? ARRRRGH. I'm really tired of the work-a-day world, but...nervous. Anyone else have a tough time letting go?

I also hate the thought of being a retiree. It's sort of one of those life events that signals the beginning of being "old" and I don't wanna be!!! Geeze, I need to snap out of it.

 

[Midpack]

Any chance there is something else, another kind of work, that you have always wanted to try? Not assuming you don't like your present position, but it sounds like you might be a good candidate for a second career, doing something you really love. Just a thought, welcome to the forum...

 

[Martha]

I wanted to retire before I was old so that I would have years (I hope) to enjoy life at a different pace. It is a beginning, not an end. I highly recommend it.

Welcome Sarah.

 

[Purron]

Sarah,

Welcome! I understand how you feel about retirement. I left a professional position I held for years last January and it has been a major adjustment. After all, we do tend to define ourselves by “what we do”. Retirement means defining yourself in terms other than those set in a structured office environment. If you explore this forum you will discover many people faced a similar situation and everyone dealt with it differently. Some found another job more in tune with their social conscience, others found volunteer work, spent more time with family, traveled the world, got into sports like golf or surfing, or simply discovered the joy of being an untethered person.

I look forward to hearing how you come to terms with the possibility of letting go of work. In every case, with every person, it's a unique experience and one we all can learn from.

 

[Meadbh]

Welcome Sarah!

My husband is not planning to retire for a few more years and we are very financially sound so I don't need to work.

There was a time when someone in those circumstances would have been looked at askance if you DID work! You are lucky to have a choice. Do you really care what other people think? Or is your identity tied to your job? Maybe you could wean yourself off your psychological dependence on your job by taking a sabbatical for a few months and focusing on your extracurricular interests.

 

[Moemg]

Welcome Sarah , There is life after retirement and a pretty good life at that !

 

[Khan]

I just have a difficult time letting go of the security of my job. I am a professional woman with 26 years at a major corporation. Should I go? Should I stay?? ARRRRGH. I'm really tired of the work-a-day world, but...nervous. Anyone else have a tough time letting go?

I also hate the thought of being a retiree. It's sort of one of those life events that signals the beginning of being "old" and I don't wanna be!!! Geeze, I need to snap out of it.

Retiring Early means you get the advantages of 'being old' AND the advantages of 'being young'.

 

[firewhen]

Retiring Early means you get the advantages of 'being old' AND the advantages of 'being young'.

I love that! So true!

I definitely have to remember that. What to look forward to when ER is eventually here.

 

[Gumby]

Welcome Sarah. I look forward to hearing your story.

 

[Dawg52]

I wanted to retire before I was old so that I would have years (I hope) to enjoy life at a different pace. It is a beginning, not an end. I highly recommend it.

Welcome Sarah.

Ditto.

 

[Cruisinthru]

Sarah,

Your post made me think of one of my first posts here. I retired three years ago at age 55 after 27 years working in the same place. I worked my way up to a high level position and while proud of my accomplishments I was tired of the rat race of work. I wanted a change, but the thought of retirement and what that would bring scared me to death. I found this forum about that time and got some great advice from those here.
I retired and have loved every minute of life since. I haven't looked back at what I left. I am looking forward instead.

If the financial areas of your life are covered, just follow your heart. You will know when the time is right. Good luck, and welcome to the forum.

 

[SarahW]

Thanks for all the replies; I have a lot of reading to do!! Do/did any of you find retirement depressing at all? I'm worried about that "loss of usefulness" thing. (Sorry I sound like such a whiner; I didn't think a retirement decision would be so stressful.)

 

[tightasadrum]

You need something to do.

Welcome Sarah,

I'm still too new at retirement to give the kind of advice others here can provide. I wondered what I'd do with myself when I gave up the daily grind. I shouldn't have wondered though. I'm so busy now, I'd like to retire from retirement! I do give myself the luxury of sleeping until the rooster gets noisy and starting the day at a leisurely pace. The rest of it is pretty non-stop.

You just need to sit down and make a short list of the things that need your attention after you quit. I can promise you the list will get longer, not shorter after three months.

If you don't need the money from work, what's the point? Get on to other things. I have a good friend that does not need to work anymore. He said he can't quit working, it defines him, gives him purpose. I suggested that he consider how he would feel about having continued working if his health suddenly failed. What if he couldn't do much of anything anymore? Would he wish he had stopped working earlier? We get no guarantees about tomorrow. Redefine yourself without your career. Believe me, you won't be out of sight before the corporation will have adjusted to life without you.

Welcome, and good luck with your decision.

 

[Steve O]

One of the most memorable quotes I've heard here was from a guy who FIRED...

He said he had gave notice and over that time came to realize "My head is full of useless information"

You only have so many days, If you need help being pushed/tripped over the cliff I think you came to the right place

 

[Midpack]

Thanks for all the replies; I have a lot of reading to do!! Do/did any of you find retirement depressing at all? I'm worried about that "loss of usefulness" thing. (Sorry I sound like such a whiner; I didn't think a retirement decision would be so stressful.)

Another thought. I'd encourage you to read Work Less, Live More by Bob Clyatt, How to Retire Happy, Wild and Free by Ernie Zelinski and/or Retire Happy by Stim & Warner. I think any of them could be very helpful...

And you're not a whiner, it's a big decision for all of us (I'm still about 2 years away from it).

 

[RDamien]

I like to think of it as independently wealthy.

Some random 20 something heir gets a trust fund and doesnt work anymore (if he ever did in the first place) you dont think of him as retired. Lucky S.O.B. maybe but not retired!

 

[Cruisinthru]

Sarah,

I did have a brief period of depression after retirement. I stress brief. Then I realized how lucky I was to be 55, healthy, and free.... I could do whatever, whenever, however, I wanted to do it. No bosses, no deadlines, no traffic, no office politics, etc. WOW! What a great realization. I then got busy doing things I like to do. I volunteer for causes that I believe in, I exercise more, I socialize with friends more.

Retiring was a big decison for me. I now look back and wonder why I didn't do it a year or two before I did. I would not go back to my former job for all the money in the world.


I

 

[kevin92610]

Do/did any of you find retirement depressing at all?

I have been retired for 6 years. Does it get boring or depressing. For me, yes it does on occasions. The 2nd six months was the toughest for me. The first 6 months was a breeze because of the newness of it all and the freedom to do anything I wanted. By the second six months I did not have a good solid routine established so I did have some moments of boredom and felt the tug of the workplace and the affirmation you get from being in the workplace.

By the 2nd year, I had moved on from the "missing work thing" and had filled my days with other activities and haven't looked back. With your spouse continuing to work you may also find that you need to guard against him taking the position of feeling his "time" is more important than yours because he is still working.

Overall, I would never go back and I most definitely do not regret my decision to retire. I had, and still have, teenage boys when I retired. I looked at it really simply: You only get one chance to raise your kids.... you can always go back to work.

Best of luck with your decision.... I have been watching my wife anguish over the same decision for the last 2 years and I see how hard it is for a successful, professional woman to pull the trigger on retirement. I tend to think that may be because of everything she went through to establish herself as a professional woman. I think for her to make the decision to retire will only come when she believes she has progressed as far as she can professionally.

regards, Kevin

 

[Kronk]

...and the affirmation you get from being in the workplace.

Dang, maybe that's what I've got wrong. I don't feel any sort of affirmation from being in the workplace.

 

[Enuff2Eat]

sarah, whatever u decide is upto you, however, i do not know of too many people in their dying bed saying.." wish i can work another year.."

good luck and we're happy for you.


enuff

 

[Milton]

Hello Sarah,

Just because you don't need to work (good for you!) doesn't mean that you should retire. Broadly speaking, there's really only two good reasons why anyone should retire:

(1) you have other activities you'd like to spend your time enjoying, rather than working; or

(2) the psychological or physical stress of working is harming your health.

I don't know your situation, but your post doesn't seem to suggest that either of those reasons currently applies to you. If you are having difficulty even considering "letting go", then presumably you enjoy most aspects of your job (notwithstanding that you are "really tired"; perhaps all you need is a good vacation?). And you didn't say anything about "I can't wait to travel / volunteer / golf / sail / hike / spend more time with friends / etc.".

Financial independence is probably a good idea for everybody, but I don't believe that necessarily holds true of early retirement. Unless and until you're sure you're ready, take your time and don't burn any boats.

Regarding the possibility of depression: quite a few studies suggest that the more people plan ahead for their retirement, the easier and more successful the transition. The retirees who struggle tend to be those who gave no thought to how they would spend their time. Google "Successful Retirement" and you will find some resources that may help.

 

[Walt34]

Retirement was an adjustment unlike anything I'd ever experienced before. DW and I both started working in our early teens and didn't stop until retirement. The first year was like being on vacation since we moved immediately afterwards, the second year was a bit more difficult, adjusting to having lots of free time and nothing scheduled. And I did go through a period of depression - it's hard to let go of an identity one has held for almost 30 years, at least it was for me. But at the same time it was a relief because I could also let go of the responsibilities that went with it.

But then I thought "Why do I need to schedule anything?"

We have all the privileges of adulthood with almost none of the responsibilities. We have good health, a steady income, a paid-for roof over our heads, two vehicles, no debt, funds set aside for any reasonably foreseeable contingencies, a small boat to go fishing with or just a lazy day on the river, and the list goes on. We bought a couple of bicycles for rides (now if I can just talk DW into using them more) and enjoy that.

There can be some boredom when the weather is lousy but family and friends noticed within a year that we were both more relaxed than they'd ever seen us. We're not ones for lots of travel, preferring day trip type outings for the most part, and that works for us.

DW is very close to family and it's important to her to have lots of free time to spend with them. We recently discovered that her father has been living beyond his means and we're working on getting him into an environment that he can afford and where he won't have to have a car since his driving days are clearly numbered, so that's the "project" for now.

Retirement is a phase change, no question. But as one of my older relatives put it "When it's time to retire, you will know". I don't believe you'll need to ask anyone else.

Be grateful that the decision is voluntary and not dictated by health or economic issues at your place of employment as has happened to so many other people.

 

[FreeAtLast]

Hi Sarah,

Welcome to the Forum. You are the only one that can make the decision of when to leave. I still work a few morning a week and there are those weeks that I feel that I don't have time to work.

Good luck

 

[Dawg52]

Thanks for all the replies; I have a lot of reading to do!! Do/did any of you find retirement depressing at all? I'm worried about that "loss of usefulness" thing. (Sorry I sound like such a whiner; I didn't think a retirement decision would be so stressful.)

Depressing? Lord no. I had a lot more depressing days when I worked. Of course it helps to have a hobby or passion to keep you occupied. Golf 5 days a week for me. Maintain my yard and my Mother's yard. Take the mutt swimming and on hikes. Plenty to do.

If you retire and have absolutely no interest outside of work, you could be bored. Just be sure you have a few things lined up before you retire. You can always w*rk part time if you need that. Good luck with it all!

 

[SarahW]

I appreciate everyone taking the time to respond; as I expected there are many differing viewpoints!

Walt34, I'm thinking that it will be a a huge adjustment for me, too. Though I often yearn to hit the alarm clock with a mallet, I'm wondering if I'm really ready to throw in the towel.

Kevin92610--I understand exactly what you're saying about your wife; I'm in the same boat. It was a struggle to achieve a level of success in my career and I'm not sure exactly how to let go.

FreeatLast--yeah, I know ultimately I'm the only one who can say when I'm ready. It's just more difficult than I imagined.

Milton--you have nailed it. Right now there's nothing I can think of that I want to do that requires retirement. My greatest fear is that I will retire and once the "vacation" feeling is over, I won't know what to do with myself. I'm just feeling burned out and tired of things, but still a scaredy-cat when it comes to such a major life decision.

Again, I appreciate all who have responded. I will hang around and see if some of the retirement enthusiasm rubs off on me. I will stay out of the financial discussions because I am not financially savvy, and in fact don't plan to do anything with my company savings (largely stock) except spend the quarterly dividends. (gasp!) If I retire I will probably take a lump-sum pension distribution and roll that into some investments while living off my work-a-day hubby.