Ahhh Texas Hill Country...
The land of:
Rattlesnakes--ever see the Rattlesnake Round Up....'nuf said.
Fire Ants- you can't kill them....just piss them off enough that they move to your neighbor's yard for a while.
Tarantulas---they can jump more than 4 feet straight up. Ever see a "herd" of them moving at sunset? Not to be believed!
Blue Northerns--temperature drops 40 degress in an hour.
Cedar trees--how are your allergies?
Mesquite trees--the most brillant marketing feat of the last 100 years....mesquite chips in charcoal for BBQing. The tree is a creation of the devil..you can't cut it, kill it, or even get near it (thorns) and it grows like a weed and will squeeze out any other living thing near it.
Pecan trees---pronounced PEE CAN, a major cash crop (other than cattle).
Limestone--want a pool? Forgetaboudit unless you have the $$$ to burn blasting out layer upon layer of limestone. This goes for planting trees, bushes and even flowers around you house. Some places are OK but others are a nightmare.
Texans----rednecks on steroids...since most of them came from Tennessee originally, they have taken "Southern Redneck" to a higher level.
Texas State Vehicle-- it used to be the Suburban...now it is the Beemer in Austin but a pickup truck is still very acceptable in most places. The Escolade is the new higher class Suburban now.
Armadillo--think ant eater in a tank. Usually seen dead on the side of the road but once you get "invaded" you will realize they are very much alive. They can rip a yard to shreds in a single night. Think surface of the Moon kind of thing.
Texas State Flower--blue bonnet. You can thank Lady Bird Johnson for this one...they are everywhere and look great for about two weeks in the Spring. The rest of the time they require frequent mowing of the Interstate median strips which create traffic issues. Your tax dollars at work.
There is more but I don't want it to look too attractive....they like their privacy and don't cotton to strangers much.
As a former resident of Round Rock, TX I herby certify the above is 100% accurate.
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But then I got to wondering where the hijacking took us: Pittsburg, Hawaii, Adirondacks, Poconos, peaches, Tennessee?? Georgia!!!! Pennsylvania!! Alabama!! NY grapes, mangos in Mexico, the passion fruit in Kenya I almost wrote about, and that Texas Hill Country that is way too much like The City.
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