Reluctantly planning to retire

[VungTau]

Wishing you the best with your situation. You are certainly handling it well and planning for all options. Good luck.


If you decide to go the path of being her primary caretaker you might look into whether you can receive payment from the state for this role. My close friend took care of his mom for years until she passed. He got certified as some kind of caregiver and was paid around $800 a month via a state agency to provide her primary care. It took a lot of work (training, paperwork, etc) to get it done but it helped him out financially a lot during those years. She didn't suffer from dementia which made it easier.


Incidentally, he is now trying to re-enter the workforce at 60 and finding it very challenging.



Good luck to you sir!

 

[Dogpeace]

Agreed... I just wanted to provide the OP with a snippet of the other side since he wrote that he didn't know why anyone would be against Medicaid planning.

Noted! I won't discuss it again and already said everything I know about it.

 

[Dogpeace]

If you decide to go the path of being her primary caretaker you might look into whether you can receive payment from the state for this role. My close friend took care of his mom for years until she passed. He got certified as some kind of caregiver and was paid around $800 a month via a state agency to provide her primary care. It took a lot of work (training, paperwork, etc) to get it done but it helped him out financially a lot during those years. She didn't suffer from dementia which made it easier.

I think there is something like that available here. I have not heard about any cash payment option but there are County home health care services out there. I don't have a lot of details but it is supposed to prioritise those in greatest need, and there are not any income limits to qualify.

I expect I will learn all the possibilities over time.

I went to a caregiver support group Sunday. Two other people were there and caring for someone with the same illness as my wife. One lady was caring for her mom, who seems about two years more advanced than my wife. She had been full time caregiver but needed to return to work and was trying to find the right person to hire to sit with her mom during the day. Another older gentleman was caring for his wife who seemed nearer to the end, as he has just engaged hospice. He just said life was hell for him. It was hard to listen to their words but important to hear.

I visited a fantastic adult memory day care facility today and it looks like it may be a great fit to allow me to keep working, plus it will expand my wife's world greatly to have things to do during the day other than watch me shoo her away when I am on a business call or concentrating on work. They have food, music, art, and other activities that do not require speech or too much comprehension. It is a bit expensive but if it allow me to keep working and is good for her then it is worth it!

 

[YakGrl]

I have a friend that used the PACE program for help with her mother that was suffering from dementia.
It is a support program that tries to help to keep the family member at home if that is what is preferred.
Here is a link to info on the program.
https://www.npaonline.org/pace-you
There might be resources to help you, if it is operating in your area.