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Craigslist Response from woman to Wall Streeter:
10-22-2007, 02:40 PM
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#1
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 12,483
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Craigslist Response from woman to Wall Streeter:
Funny!!
To the gentleman who called me a depreciating asset
Date: 2007-10-11, 8:23AM EDT
Dear Sir,
I must confess that I was somewhat taken aback upon reading your email. Indeed, it has taken some time for me to sufficiently recuperate from my surprise. Lest your confidence quickly inflate for little reason (as we know is the predisposition for Wall St. types), allow me to hasten to reassure you that the source of my surprise was neither your candor nor the accuracy of your perception. Indeed, it is your "claimed" success in light of your poor grasp of economics which has me baffled. If the standards required to meet with financial success on Wall St. have sunk so low, perhaps I should indeed "make my own money", except for the fact that the effort/reward ratio is far too high for my liking - especially when so many of your ilk have displayed a far more cogent grasp of market realities than you have.
By now you are likely scratching your ever-vanishing hairline in confusion, so allow me to elaborate, dear man. To build some credibility I will tell you a bit more about yourself. Though you did not mention the details of your occupation, it is clear that you are an investment banker and not a trader, as any good trader would understand that human courtships are based upon a semi-efficient open market, and not an investment banking cartel. However, your inability to grasp the realities of the dating market is not surprising, given that you have successfully employed the tools of collusion and market manipulation rather that true acumen in your supposed wealth generation.
If your grasp of finance were not a minority partner with your ego, you would realize that the "outflows" associated with my depreciating "assets" are quite certain, and therefore subject to a low discount rate when determining their present value. In addition, though your concept of economics evidentially failed to move past the 1950s, advancement in plastic surgery is not subject to the same limitation. Thus, with some additional capital expenditure, the overall lifetime of "outflows" generated by these assets is greatly increased. Sad that Ashton Kutcher has demonstrated understanding of the female asset class which you, in all of your financial "wisdom", have not.
You, on the other hand, are, given the uncertainty of the Wall St. job market, more of an inflation-indexed junk bond with an underwater nested call option. Though you may argue that you are more of an equity investment, my monetary minimums required from you do not change, and if you are unable to pay them, I will liquidate you without the benefit of a chapter 11, just as you would me.
Because your outflows are so much more uncertain with respect to mine, I require additional compensation in the form of a underwater nested call option on your future assets. I say underwater because, even taking into account the value of your junk bond coupon payment to me, the value of my "outflow" is in excess of the market price of your equity (which is quite low due to its riskiness associated with your poor grasp of finance and my existing claim upon your junk bond coupon).
I must thank you though for raising the question, despite the reputation cost of subjecting your weak logic to such widespread scrutiny. This took either considerable courage or ignorance on your part- and we'll give you the benefit of doubt, just this once. My current boyfriend (a trader who lives in Central Park West, of course) and I thoroughly enjoyed discussing your response and we wish you the best of luck in your unhappy pursuit of that elusive market inefficiency.
Just a clueless ditz whose boyfriend wrote the retort to get some "crazy nookie".............
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10-22-2007, 03:02 PM
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#2
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 2,032
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Wow! So poorly written it could have only been a trader.
Not only does it not make sense, it isn't even funny.
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10-22-2007, 03:09 PM
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#3
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 12,483
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__________________
Consult with your own advisor or representative. My thoughts should not be construed as investment advice. Past performance is no guarantee of future results (love that one).......:)
This Thread is USELESS without pics.........:)
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10-22-2007, 03:11 PM
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#4
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 1,703
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What makes you think it was the same person? This is the internet. It could have been a dog.
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Emancipated from wage-slavery since 2002
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10-22-2007, 03:12 PM
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#5
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Moderator Emeritus
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Oahu
Posts: 26,860
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Quote:
Oh, I don't know, I love it when hot chicks talk financial geek like that...
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Co-author (with my daughter) of “Raising Your Money-Savvy Family For Next Generation Financial Independence.”
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10-22-2007, 03:14 PM
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#6
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 12,483
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nords
Oh, I don't know, I love it when hot chicks talk financial geek like that...
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How do we know she was hot on the Internet??
Funny, I never found a hot chick to discuss "triangular currency arbitrage" with me............
__________________
Consult with your own advisor or representative. My thoughts should not be construed as investment advice. Past performance is no guarantee of future results (love that one).......:)
This Thread is USELESS without pics.........:)
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10-22-2007, 03:25 PM
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#7
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Independence
Posts: 7,298
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Quote:
Geeeze! WE know she was hot on the internet BECAUSE SHE SAID she was hot on the internet. She may be a plumber named Floyd from joisey, but on the internet she's hot. and she.
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10-22-2007, 04:04 PM
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#8
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Hooverville
Posts: 22,983
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Quote:
Originally Posted by calmloki
... but on the internet she's hot. and she.
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Isn't fantasy wonderful?
Ha
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"As a general rule, the more dangerous or inappropriate a conversation, the more interesting it is."-Scott Adams
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10-22-2007, 04:54 PM
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#9
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Feb 2006
Posts: 3,895
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i just read the first few sentences and it does not seem to me to be in the same sentence structure (voice or fingerprint) as what i recall from the original post. also the original was not an email, as stated in this post, but a post on a bulletin board.
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"off with their heads"~~dr. joseph-ignace guillotin
"life should begin with age and its privileges and accumulations, and end with youth and its capacity to splendidly enjoy such advantages."~~mark twain - letter to edward kimmitt 1901
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10-22-2007, 05:06 PM
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#10
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Independence
Posts: 7,298
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lazygood4nothinbum
i just read the first few sentences and it does not seem to me to be in the same sentence structure (voice or fingerprint) as what i recall from the original post. also the original was not an email, as stated in this post, but a post on a bulletin board.
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Yeah, doesn't sound like the original poster (Madam Floyd). To be fair, it claims to be written by her current boyfriend to get some "crazy nookie". He's a trader from Central Park West (read trash collector Ernie from Queens).
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10-22-2007, 05:13 PM
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#11
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Feb 2006
Posts: 3,895
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Quote:
Originally Posted by calmloki
Yeah, doesn't sound like the original poster (Madam Floyd). To be fair, it claims to be written by her current boyfriend to get some "crazy nookie". He's a trader from Central Park West (read trash collector Ernie from Queens).
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oh, sorry, didn't get that far. it is written in first person. had i known traders to be such creative writers i might have considered the field. publishing sure didn't pay what they make.
__________________
"off with their heads"~~dr. joseph-ignace guillotin
"life should begin with age and its privileges and accumulations, and end with youth and its capacity to splendidly enjoy such advantages."~~mark twain - letter to edward kimmitt 1901
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10-22-2007, 05:47 PM
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#12
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 7,733
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I think the Wall St. guys initial response was pretty funny. This comeback is just lame.
FYI checking out on Snopes, it seems like at least the initial post by the gold digger is real.
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10-23-2007, 11:33 AM
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#13
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Recycles dryer sheets
Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 53
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Very poorly written. The economical arguments are sound, but they don't make for an interesting, and funny read. Her retort blows.
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10-23-2007, 12:19 PM
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#14
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 12,483
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__________________
Consult with your own advisor or representative. My thoughts should not be construed as investment advice. Past performance is no guarantee of future results (love that one).......:)
This Thread is USELESS without pics.........:)
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10-23-2007, 01:28 PM
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#15
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Recycles dryer sheets
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 331
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I'm not a hot chick, but I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night... Err, nm, that doesn't work as well as it does in the commercials!
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10-23-2007, 02:05 PM
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#16
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Recycles dryer sheets
Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 53
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10-23-2007, 03:38 PM
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#17
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Full time employment: Posting here.
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Calgary
Posts: 805
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That reply made no sense at all...
Btw, if she already has a boyfriend, then why did she make the original post on how to land a rich husband anyway??
__________________
I can only be nice to one person today! Today is not your day...tomorrow doesn't look good either.
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10-23-2007, 05:14 PM
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#18
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Full time employment: Posting here.
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Columbus
Posts: 769
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Calgary_Girl
That reply made no sense at all...
Btw, if she already has a boyfriend, then why did she make the original post on how to land a rich husband anyway??
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Maybe her current beau is a little short.........on funds.
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10-23-2007, 11:36 PM
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#19
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 7,733
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Calgary_Girl
That reply made no sense at all...
Btw, if she already has a boyfriend, then why did she make the original post on how to land a rich husband anyway??
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I think she found the new alleged boyfriend after posting her original whine about not enough good men sugar daddy suckers
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10-24-2007, 08:46 AM
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#20
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 12,483
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Or is "short" in other areas............
__________________
Consult with your own advisor or representative. My thoughts should not be construed as investment advice. Past performance is no guarantee of future results (love that one).......:)
This Thread is USELESS without pics.........:)
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