How often does the topic of retirement come up?

[Winemaker]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Grabberson I had to pop into a bank a while back, and estimate the teller was 5-8 years older than me. While processing the transaction she made small talk "Hang in there, it's almost the weekend!". Without thinking, I trotted out my usual joke (which is a big hit with my family and friends): "I'm retired, so stick close to home on weekends because the workin' stiffs are underfoot!". Ha ha! Umm, immediately realized this joke was not a big hit with her, quite the contrary. We finished in stony silence. Think it hit a nerve because she internalized it. She likely has no happy retirement plans or aspirations to chat about, isn't the least bit curious about it, hates her job, has a deadbeat husband, etc. etc. Is it my duty to be sensitive to that? Yeah, probably, especially if I want my jokes to work. So, Bigdawg, I didn't feel shame about ER, but it did bring home that my situation triggers the angst already present in some.

Under Graham-Dodd banking law, bank employees are required "to continually upgrade info on their customers and get to know them" especially if they are moving larger sums of money around. I use the ATM exclusively when depositing rent checks, and money orders. I issue receipts when paid in cash, and spend the cash out of pocket. I avoid bank tellers as they are paid to be a "nosy" sort, and when they see a checkbook balance they get all gushy and ask if we want to talk to someone in their wealth department. I always tell 'em "no", that's how I got and stay wealthy.

[marko]

Around here (north of Boston) we have a lot of trust funders (who claim to be artists/gallery owners) or state employees who took their pension at age 48 or so; and I've gone to school with both types.

At least in these parts, having early retirees walking about during the day rarely raises many eyebrows or beg awkward questions. When I RE'd at 53 I never ran into anyone who wondered how, why or what.

Regardless, one of the great things of ER is being able to stop worrying about what other people think.

[Grabberson]

So mention to someone that Peyton Manning retired and they're likely to smile, nod and bond. But mention that I retired and they'll likely feel awkward or resentful.

In people's minds, why is one okay and the other not?

[Dtail]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Grabberson So mention to someone that Peyton Manning retired and they're likely to smile, nod and bond. But mention that I retired and they'll likely feel awkward or resentful. In people's minds, why is one okay and the other not?

Never thought of that angle. Regular guy vs. impossible to compare to QB superstar

[Jerry1]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bigdawg I don't understand the "not wanting to talk about it". Are ER folks ashamed?

Not ashamed, but I learned about being careful a while back. My assistant/secretary was all happy it was payday. I forget what she asked, but without thinking, I said something like “I don’t pay attention to it being payday.” No sooner was that out of my mouth and I realized, she, and many people, are acutely aware of what day is payday. It’s not a big deal, but it’s something to be aware of. We’re not like a lot of people and at some level, it can be insensitive to highlight that fact. You never know what issues or struggles someone is going through and I’m just a bit cautious since that event to tread lightly unless and until I’ve given some thought to who I’m talking to.

[Souschef]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Winemaker Under Graham-Dodd banking law, bank employees are required "to continually upgrade info on their customers and get to know them" especially if they are moving larger sums of money around. I use the ATM exclusively when depositing rent checks, and money orders. I issue receipts when paid in cash, and spend the cash out of pocket. I avoid bank tellers as they are paid to be a "nosy" sort, and when they see a checkbook balance they get all gushy and ask if we want to talk to someone in their wealth department. I always tell 'em "no", that's how I got and stay wealthy.

I had a bunch of cash in my safe deposit box. I took out 7 K to pay for a car and deposited it in my checking account. Now that is way under the 10K where they have to file a report. However, the teller asked me the source of the money. I told her i got it from my safe deposit box to buy a car. That ended that conversation.
I deposited about the same amount of cash in another bank, and there was not even a raised eyebrow.

[txtig]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Grabberson Without thinking, I trotted out my usual joke (which is a big hit with my family and friends): "I'm retired, so stick close to home on weekends because the workin' stiffs are underfoot!". Ha ha! Umm, immediately realized this joke was not a big hit with her, quite the contrary. We finished in stony silence.

Well, maybe that teller didn’t like it, but I laughed out loud. But, maybe that’s because that’s exactly how I feel. Can’t wait until Monday!!

[Dtail]

Quote:

Originally Posted by txtig Well, maybe that teller didn’t like it, but I laughed out loud. But, maybe that’s because that’s exactly how I feel. Can’t wait until Monday!!

+1 see my sig line.

[marko]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jerry1 We’re not like a lot of people and at some level, it can be insensitive to highlight that fact. You never know what issues or struggles someone is going through and I’m just a bit cautious since that event to tread lightly unless and until I’ve given some thought to who I’m talking to.

"The rich are different from you and me..."