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06-07-2019, 12:16 PM
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#4741
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Moderator Emeritus
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Conroe, Texas
Posts: 18,731
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__________________
*********Go Yankees!*********
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06-07-2019, 01:27 PM
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#4742
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 35,712
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The above Youtube video had this comment posted:
 Quote:
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It's called "almond milk" because no one will drink "nut juice".
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__________________
"Old age is the most unexpected of all things that happen to a man" -- Leon Trotsky (1879-1940)
"Those Who Can Make You Believe Absurdities Can Make You Commit Atrocities" - Voltaire (1694-1778)
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06-15-2019, 09:07 AM
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#4743
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 12,880
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This video is crude and disgusting and it's childish bathroom humor. But I have to confess that when I watched it I laughed harder than I have in years.
Watch at your own discretion.
__________________
Al
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06-15-2019, 02:02 PM
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#4744
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Recycles dryer sheets
Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: New England
Posts: 370
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TromboneAl
This video is crude and disgusting and it's childish bathroom humor. But I have to confess that when I watched it I laughed harder than I have in years.
Watch at your own discretion.
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Seen this before, hilarious!
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06-16-2019, 01:38 PM
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#4745
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 12,880
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Why don't you hear anything when a pterodactyl goes to the bathroom?
Because the P is silent
__________________
Al
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06-24-2019, 12:41 PM
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#4746
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 12,880
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__________________
Al
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06-24-2019, 01:42 PM
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#4747
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 35,712
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The above video is indeed too crude.
I like something less graphic, like the following.
__________________
"Old age is the most unexpected of all things that happen to a man" -- Leon Trotsky (1879-1940)
"Those Who Can Make You Believe Absurdities Can Make You Commit Atrocities" - Voltaire (1694-1778)
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06-25-2019, 08:49 PM
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#4748
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Texas: No Country for Old Men
Posts: 50,022
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...
__________________
Numbers is hard
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06-27-2019, 06:21 AM
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#4749
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Moderator
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Flyover country
Posts: 25,362
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The cable repairman was on my street and as I walked by he asked me what time it was.
I told him it was between 8 am and 1 pm.
__________________
I thought growing old would take longer.
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06-27-2019, 06:45 AM
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#4750
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Texas
Posts: 10,941
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06-27-2019, 07:48 AM
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#4751
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Full time employment: Posting here.
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Dogpatch
Posts: 561
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Maybe this isn't a joke.
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06-27-2019, 07:52 AM
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#4752
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Cville
Posts: 1,604
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Cute one scrapped from web
__________________
FIRE 31 Aug, 2018 - Always leave every place better than you found it, always give more than expected or Due
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06-27-2019, 07:58 AM
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#4753
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 8,368
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^ "Fido's not here." (Apologies to Cheech & Chong.)
__________________
"Exit, pursued by a bear."
The Winter's Tale, William Shakespeare
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07-03-2019, 11:50 AM
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#4754
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 12,880
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__________________
Al
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07-03-2019, 04:11 PM
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#4755
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: GTA
Posts: 1,728
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"""My wife asked why I was whispering. I said I'm afraid the government is listening. She laughed. I laughed. Alexa and Siri laughed"""
__________________
Family Motto: "Every penny's a prisoner"
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07-03-2019, 04:15 PM
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#4756
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Everett
Posts: 1,593
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Two fonts walk into a bar and sit down to order drinks. They wait for the bartender to come over, but he doesn't. They wait, and wait some more. Finally, one font shouts over at him, "Hey, can we order some drinks here?", and the bartender says, "Sorry, but we don't serve your type here."
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07-03-2019, 05:46 PM
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#4757
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Mar 2003
Posts: 18,085
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Where did Captain Hook get his hook?
From a second hand shop.
__________________
"All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others."
- George Orwell
Ezekiel 23:20
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07-03-2019, 06:01 PM
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#4758
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 35,712
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The following are no jokes.
Rhotacism (speech impediment): the inability or difficulty in pronouncing the sound r.
In 2002, a tree was planted in a park in Los Angeles in memory of Beatles guitarist George Harrison. The tree later died after being infested by beetles.
Emerson Mose, the CEO of Crayola, retired after 35 years working there. He revealed that he was color blind.
The winners of an elementary school spelling bee competition in Utah received trophies with the inscription "Viewmont Spellling Bee".
__________________
"Old age is the most unexpected of all things that happen to a man" -- Leon Trotsky (1879-1940)
"Those Who Can Make You Believe Absurdities Can Make You Commit Atrocities" - Voltaire (1694-1778)
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07-10-2019, 04:38 PM
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#4759
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Moderator
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Eastern WV Panhandle
Posts: 25,346
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Signs at the eye doctor:
__________________
When I was a kid I wanted to be older. This is not what I expected.
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07-11-2019, 11:20 PM
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#4760
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 35,712
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Lenny had this phobia. Every night, he was afraid there was someone hiding under his bed.
The psychiatrist told him it would be cured if Lenny went to see him every week for a year. Each visit cost $200. Lenny said he would think about it.
Some time later, Lenny ran across the shrink, who asked why he had not come back. Lenny said his bartender fixed his fear for free.
The shrink asked "How?"
Lenny said "He told me to cut the legs off the bed".
__________________
"Old age is the most unexpected of all things that happen to a man" -- Leon Trotsky (1879-1940)
"Those Who Can Make You Believe Absurdities Can Make You Commit Atrocities" - Voltaire (1694-1778)
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