It's funny joke Thursday! 2005 - 2020

[Nemo2]

I'm sorry you are put off; these puns seem to be leading to division.

Most of them don't add up. And as for the remainder.......

 

[Chuckanut]

I didn't at first, because I can be a bit obtuse.



See what I did there?

That's acute play on words.

 

[Car-Guy]

Doesn't everyone?

 

[Car-Guy]

I always liked this simple little math trick...

 

[Jeb-NY]

I Went for a walk with my new girlfriend and we saw dogs mating.

She said: "How does the male know when the female is ready for sex?"

I replied: "He can smell she is ready. That's how nature works."

We then walked past a sheep field and the ram was mating the ewe.

Again my girlfriend asked: "How does the ram know when the ewe is ready for sex?"

I replied: "It's nature. He can smell she is ready."

We then went past a cow-field and the bull was mating with the cow.

My girlfriend said: "They are really going at it. Surely the bull can't smell when she is ready?"

I said: "Oh, yes; it's nature. All animals can smell when the female is ready for sex."

Anyway, after the walk, I dropped her home and kissed her goodbye.

She said: "Take care and get yourself checked out for Covid-19."

Surprised, "Why do you say that?" I asked her.

She replied: "You seem to have lost your sense of smell."

 

[Jeb-NY]

A drunk goes into a bar. "Drinks for everyone, and one for you too." he says to the bartender. The bartender serves everyone, including himself. "That'll be £76, please." I don't have any money." says the drunk. The bartender takes him outside and beats him up.

The next day the drunk comes back. "Drinks for everyone, including the bartender." The bartender thinks to himself, he wouldn't be so stupid to do the same thing again - he must have money this time, so he serves the drinks. But when he asks him to pay, the drunk tells him that he doesn't have any money again. The bartender takes him outside and gives him a savage beating.

The next night, the same drunk comes in and tells the bartender to get a drink for everyone. "And not one for me tonight?" asks the bartender. "Nah," says the drunk. "You get violent when you drink

 

[WestUniversity]

 

[Car-Guy]

This guy bought a cabin by the lake with his $600 windfall

 

[Car-Guy]

And here's my last joke to be posted for the year...

Appropriate for 2020! Let's all hope for a better 2021.


Happy New Year to all !

 

[ugeauxgirl]

Love it- thanks for all the smiles, Car-Guy!

[emoji23][emoji23][emoji23] And here's my last joke to be posted for the year...

Appropriate for 2020! Let's all hope for a better 2021.


Happy New Year to all !