Morning Menage Trois

[MichealKnight]

Emotional menage trois, that is. Far be it from me to use a provocative title just for ratings. Regret and anger on one side - pride and relief on the other.

Well, been 18 months since retiring - I've turned 47. Long story short - no college - had a decent small business career - had 17 great years - and then towards the end, 3 rather crappy ones. Put away some money - (excluding residence - net worth around $3.8mm - no debts)...,but, anyone including me would've bet I was easily on my way to $10mm. I'd say 30% my fault+ 70% getting screwed- is why I had to exit early.

So I do brood - but I'm also thankful for what I believe to be financial security, and a very easy life. Less luxurious than was or could have been - but still - the ease is wonderful. Many times I want to mount a comeback - but that requires risking a good 70%+ of my net worth - - and there are industry shifts that favor public companies, or families with $50mm net worths - over a small fry like me.

Anyhow, I was trying to cheer myself up today. Was in the McDonald's parking lot (I passionately adore fast food - just have really cut down on it lately). I was feeling sad over my incomplete business achievements, about not having a business where my kids could visit, see, learn. About how I'll be sort of scraping and watching every dime for college expenses - versus telling DD to go wherever she wants, and an older age where I have money to throw around.

But I try to balance it. I spend most of my days being with kids and DW. Playing low stakes poker. Eating out or cooking. Watching movies in the magnificent home theater I put in - replete with the coolest movie art adorning all the walls.

Finances- yeah, I[m a trifle worried. Over the long term - if stocks can return me 5% nominal , and people keep paying rent - I'll be good. So I was sitting at McD..... I saw the usual line of customers at the drive thru - trying to cheer myself I noted that - they're buying McD and Coke, they're driving many times Ford, GM, Mercedes, and some of them are burning fuel from Exxon or Chevron. Many of them pay up for I-Phones, Nike, and use Google. I was telling myself....yeah, I'll be ok and while it SUCKS not to have gone all the way - this is not bad for a guy with no degree who had one of the lowest GPAs in high school.

14 YO DD is to have unexpected scoliosis (back) surgery between now and summer we're all terrified. I do love having the freedom to do all the doctor appointments, to do her school runs so no bus..... and I do like that I'll have no business nor boss and will take off all the time needed till its over.

You can't always get what you want...but if you try sometime....'you'll get what you need'

At least that's what I'm selling myself on. Trying to anyway.

BTW- Steak and Egg and Cheese bagel - was frigging flawless today. Oh my God I wish I could have eaten 2.

 

[Letj]

You have done very well, probably more than 98% of Americans and more than 99.999 in the world so please keep that in perspective. I retired at 50 from a Fortune 500 company and left a lot of money on the table. I also own rentals but along the way I lost out on easy opportunities that would have made me extremely wealthy (banks offered me huge portfolio of foreclosures and two forced sales for pennies on the dollar because of city code enforcement but I was too chicken to give up my day job). I used to have regrets but realize they were not really losses. Failure to see opportunities or not being able to take advantage of them isn’t a loss. I am now grateful that I don’t have to work and I have the privilege of time over money. Count your blessings, focus on what’s important to you (which you seem to be doing) and find your joy. You still have time to consider other business opportunities, if that’s what you want to do, but I wouldn’t put too much of my net worth at risk if I were you.

 

[pacergal]

You don't say what your budget is related to investments, but with almost $4 million, you have won the game by a huge margin compared to the majority of Americans. You are very blessed.

Scoliosis surgery can be frightening, but is a fairly common orthopedic surgery. Your daughter is young and as long as she follows the recovery plan and PT if needed, she will do well. She has Dad there with her to help!
Sending well wishes for an uneventful surgery and recovery.

 

[njhowie]

As much as I try to sympathize as much as possible with folks on this site, I have extreme difficulty in this case, Michael.

You are still young, and if you have any doubts financially whatsoever, you didn't have to retire, you could likely get another job without too much difficulty right now, or go start your own business. Clearly you have a lot of valuable experience in whatever field you were in, could likely provide it to a new employer, or create your own second act - and reach that $10mm goal.

Don't brood - get excited. Seems to me that if you're thinking like this now, you're only going to be letting it get to you even more going forward. If you don't have a second act coming as far as work, then find something new to explore and become good at and get (some much needed) satisfaction.

You likely have half of your life to look forward to - that's a lot of time.

Apologies if I'm being too blunt - I have that habit sometimes.