need help gaining perspective, teen son

[haha]

So you fill up your Netflix queue with Marine movies maybe starting with Private Benjamin, then work your way through Tribes and others, maybe don't put The Deer Hunter in there. Anyways, with enough Marine movies floating around the house, the kid will get the hint.

Maybe you missed that he is not my son, he is my nephew. So I am not really in a position to salt his movie queue even if I wanted to which I don't. And, as I thought I made clear, I try to not overstretch the domain of my knowledge. While I might feel that in general, military service and even perhaps the Marines might be a good choice in a situation like this, to know that this would hold true in this particular instance would require clairvoyance, which I unfortunately do not possess.

Ha

 

[LOL!]

haha, my apologies, I was not talking about your nephew in particular, but in unmotivated kids who have finished high school in general. Military boot camp has been a traditional next step for such young adults.

 

[bright eyed]

Thanks KM I really appreciate you sharing your experience. We have recommended to him that he go to therapy - he went once when he was young and think he has so much in his head that is not being sorted out - all the stuff that he has suppressed from his childhood is coming to bear...and his way of handling it up till now was to ignore it. But now a lot of the choices he is making are affected by whether or how he views various past experiences from his dad, mom and other adults in his life...

As far as we know there are not drugs or other problems in the picture. He is experimenting with drinking, weed and cigarettes - but don't think it is anything serious that we know of...well guess we wouldn't know until it is serious - but since the baby has been born he has been acting much more responsibly than leading up to it! He has an addictive personality and alcoholism in his family - which we've discussed with him extensively so he should be somewhat aware of the risk - he's seen his grandpa act like a fool in front of him growing up.

I'd posted a while back about the military - sure looks like a decent option for him and after seeing what it did for my cousin - even better. But I'm not naive in knowing that some blossom and others are crushed by the experience. I agree w/ Ha's perspective in that I'd never want to be the one pushing him knowing the real-life consequences and current political situations that make it much more dangerous. He knows it's an option but doubt it is very appealing to him - also some baggage from his GF's side about that.

Just goes to show the roller coaster ride may smooth out a little but always another hill or curve up ahead! I just have to accept that...

 

[Lazarus]

I have been in the military. They are very good at motivation.No regrets from me.