Poll: Gravesite or not?

[braumeister]

Out of curiosity, I wonder how many of us plan to do the traditional "burial in the ground" routine. Both my parents asked me to simply scatter their ashes at sea, and I was happy to comply. But that was frowned upon by most of my relatives.

I have friends from the military who are set on being buried in a National Cemetery, which is seen as a great honor (and it is). But it's not important to me so I've told DW I'd rather she just scatter them at a location in the Rocky Mountains.

DW will most likely be buried in the same little rural cemetery where her family has been interred since the 18th century.

So many choices. Where do you expect to end up?

 

[W2R]

I have no idea. I'd prefer to have a traditional burial in the ground, but that's impossible in New Orleans due to the high water table.

I guess I'll have to leave that problem up to those who outlive me. Seems like everyone is getting cremated these days and I guess it is cheaper, so I suppose that is what they will do. For some reason that doesn't appeal to me, but then I won't be around to object. No need to scatter my ashes at sea, since I really don't want to add to oceanic pollution.

This has got to be the most morbid thread ever!

 

[RunningBum]

I have a long estate instructions note for my son, who is my primary heir. In it I wrote that I don't really care what happens to me. If he wants a grave site to visit, or an urn with ashes, that's great. Otherwise he could scatter my ashes in the mountains behind my house, or wherever.

I feel like this kind of thing is better decided by the living. The problem, I guess, is when there are multiple heirs and they disagree, it's better for the deceased to have made a definite plan so this doesn't cause dissension in the family.

 

[Koogie]

Tibetan sky burial

or

cremated and put out in the Green bin.

 

[Dawg52]

My grandparents purchased enough plots for our family years ago. So one is waiting on me when I go belly up.

 

[CardsFan]

Interesting post.

DW and I have agreed to be cremated. Original thoughts, for her, was to to be scattered in several places (Lake Tahoe, our friends farm, and a lake we used to live on). It appears the Catholic church frowns on scattering several places, so probably Lake Tahoe (we went there on out honeymoon, and have been at least 10 time since).

For me, I frankly do not care, so what ever makes peace in the family.

Probably no grave site. I have not been to my parents in over 20 years. And even longer to the "old" family sites where grandparents are buried.

Don't want DS to feel the least bit guity about not visiting a grave.

 

[street]

I voted othah because will do a couple of the choices you gave. I will have some with a headstone/marker in a very rural cemetery and the rest will be scattered on my ranch and in my happy hunting grounds.

 

[MichaelB]

DW’s preference is be buried in a cemetery but she doesn’t object to cremation as long as her ashes are interred in a columbarium niche. In the likely case I die before she does she’ll likely do the same for me. If she’s not around to make the decision I’ll be cremated and my kids will do something with my ashes. My recommendation is a compost pile but they are free to choose.

 

[CardsFan]

I voted othah because will do a couple of the choices you gave. I will have some with a headstone/marker in a very rural cemetery and the rest will be scattered on my ranch and in my happy hunting grounds.

Now that sounds like the best of both worlds.

 

[RetireeRobert]

Buried my wife in a small historic rural pioneer cemetery about two miles and four minutes from our home. If I walk about 300 feet from my front porch to the first turn in the lane, I can look down over the countryside and see the cemetery. If I had a telescope, I could read the inscription on her headstone. My resting spot is right next to hers. I have given all three kids a copy of my plot deed and a design for my headstone, so that takes one more decision (and any possible squabbles) off the table for them.

 

[Gumby]

Direct cremation with inurnment at the US Naval Academy columbarium.

 

[Dtail]

Scattering of ashes somewhere.
Keeping it simple.

 

[audreyh1]

My mother’s ashes are interred in a family burial plot and my fathers ashes have a spot next to hers.

Plan cremation but haven’t decided what to do with the ashes. But don’t particularly want a gravesite with headstone.

 

[2017ish]

Other. Planning to donate bodies to medical school for lab use. I guess, in the end, they'll end up being cremated, but neither of us care.

 

[Jerry1]

Me - cremated. DW - not too keen on it for herself. Mostly, I don’t care, but I was thinking that DW could be traditionally buried and maybe my ashes (or some of them) could be incorporated into her gravesite. Maybe sealed into her headstone or bury the urn by her side. Not sure but as has been said, it’s up to those who will be there to take care of such things.

 

[aja8888]

My instructions are to have me cremated and save the metal parts in me for scrap metal (two hips joints, some stainless steel stuff in my left shoulder, three dental implant threaded inserts, a gold post in one tooth (that may melt), a plate and four screws in my left forearm and a rod in the other arm bone. I think that's all (for now).

The ashes can be handled any way my daughter sees fit. I don't care about an expensive obituary in the paper as I won't be here to proof read it. She has the phone numbers of my friends and nephews to call and let them know I won't be around to pester them anymore. She also knows where the money and gold coins are kept too.

Even though I was military, I don't care for the National Cemetery burial service although I am qualified.

 

[mickeyd]

My final address will be at a military cemetery along with Mrs. mickeyd. I have already been pre-approved by the VA. I do not have a preference on how it all works out. I will be out of town.

 

[steelyman]

I’d love to have my ashes scattered over Wrigley Field but that’s unlikely.

 

[CardsFan]

My instructions are to have me cremated and save the metal parts in me for scrap metal (two hips joints, some stainless steel stuff in my left shoulder, three dental implant threaded inserts, a gold post in one tooth (that may melt), a plate and four screws in my left forearm and a rod in the other arm bone. I think that's all (for now).

You sound like a friend of ours. We keep telling her husband to salvage the parts. 2 knees, one shoulder, there has to be some good titanium in there.

In seriousness, we all need to do what is comfortable for us (and our immediate kin).

 

[Amethyst]

Yes. Our wills state organ donation, followed by medical school donation if we don't die in circumstances that would allow the organs to be used.

My physical therapist was telling me about dissecting cadavers to learn about anatomy in relation to PT treatment. Bodies were so scarce, and costly, that eight students had to share one, which came down to each student only getting a little piece of the body part they were studying. I asked if there was an upper age limit on the cadavers. She said absolutely not. Patients come in all ages, after all. Also, the presence of physical issues suffered by the body's original owner (like arthritis and artificial joints) is considered instructive!

Other. Planning to donate bodies to medical school for lab use. I guess, in the end, they'll end up being cremated, but neither of us care.

 

[Ronstar]

I’d love to have my ashes scattered over Wrigley Field but that’s unlikely.

Very unlikely to be scattered by helicopter or small plane. I believe wrigley field is a no fly zone.

 

[Ronstar]

My ashes will be buried in the same grave as DW at a local cemetery. My ashes container above her casket. Two can be buried in one grave if at least one is cremated. So I will be planted twice if I proceed DW. They will dig me up to bury DW and then replant me.

 

[Nick12]

Some scatter the ashes in a memorable place even at Walt Disney World.

 

[timbervest]

One of the first things DW did after we got married many years ago (she being from a Eastern European Catholic heritage) was to have us buy plots "for the future" so I already have a place ready for me!

 

[PaunchyPirate]

I’ve instructed my executor to cremate me and scatter my ashes at a “scenic water location” of her choosing.