Serving as an Executor

[SecondCor521]

I'm not sure what they did, but whenever I read threads like this I have a tremendous amount of respect for my parents and how they've raised us. They'll have a complicated estate but I have absolute faith that my two sisters and I will sort it all out in an orderly fashion and respect whatever final wishes my parents have.

2Cor521

 

[simple girl]

Long time posters need to put something in their will telling the executor to send a message to this message board when you die!

My mother was an active member of an internet list-serve. When she passed I did let everyone know, and it was a meaningful experience for me and I assume, the list members, too.

 

[clifp]

I wonder how often the executor is unaware that he or she is the chosen one. I mean, let's say that they open my will and it says:

"My executor is to be Martha from the ER Forum. She lives somewhere in Minnesota, and looks like this:

"

I'll do a bit of threadjacking.

But how do people decide who should be executor? When I set up my trust 9 years ago, I gave the job to one of my best friends, who is a lawyer (albeit not a estate law) and very detail oriented. As payment for this admittedly thankless task, I gave him 5% of my estate. I moved away and we have drifted apart talking or seeing each other perhaps once or twice a year.

I am thinking I should update my will and trying to figure out who should be trustee. I'll contact my friend first to see if he is still willing to do the job. I am tempted to give the job to my neice, but considering that she is one of the main beneficaries I think their maybe a conflict. She is smart girl but with three kids has a very busy schedule.

My grandfather set up a charitable remainder trust, with a church acting as an executor. Unfortunately one of the trust officers conned my senile Grandma into doing dumb things and it cost the family at least $500,000 and 2 years of horrendous stress.

I also here people like Pederro complain bitterly about the bank trustees and executors of his parents estate.

Anybody have thoughts on pros and cons of friends, relatives, or "professionals" act as executors.

 

[Martha]

We have friends as our executors. Good enough friends so that they would do it for free if we let them. I am their executor.

As the years go by and we all get older, I can see having to revisit the issue. It is going to be tough because right now I can think of absolutely no young person who I know who could be executor. I might end up having to use a bank trust officer. Which I am not thrilled about.

 

[Nords]

Anybody have thoughts on pros and cons of friends, relatives, or "professionals" act as executors.

We're trying to keep it in the family. Mother-in-law is our kid's guardian (until our kid turns 18) and BIL the CPA is the executor.

But when our kid turns 18 then we're making her the [-]executioner[/-] executor. She's getting [-]anything that's left[/-] it all anyway.

I figure the person inheriting the majority of the estate might as well work for it. My father was executor for his wife and his father, and that was painful enough.