Things I have learned over time

[UnrealizedPotential]

I think the biggest thing I have learned is that it is more important, much more important to have alot of money and keep investing it than picking the perfect mutual fund or investment. Do these even exist? It takes money to make money. It took me a long time to realize that. Somehow I thought picking the right fund was going to magically get me to these milestones with ease. I had not accounted for bear markets or the effects compounding has on a portfolio. Another thing I have learned is that it is tough to give up ideas that you have had for years, but to do so can be rewarding and informative and enlightening. I am much slower to give my opinion now because I am not sure I am right, and as I get get older I find myself questioning everything . One thing this does is it allows learning to occur. Someone who thinks they know it all can learn nothing. Any thoughts?

[Sarah in SC]

I'm learning that kindness and empathy are a lot more persuasive than dogma and principle.

That whole "questioning everything" you mentioned is also a good one.

[Totoro]

I am actually learning to trust my judgment more over time in many areas of my life, because experience seems to prove I'm usually right.

Also I'm much more willing to be proven wrong about something than not move forward at all, slowly getting over my own ego I guess

Then again, only 34 so ..

[MichaelB]

Yup. It's often better to be nice, than right. Tomorrow isn't always there. Life is a gift, being able to share it with others is real joy. Asking the right question is more important knowing all the answers. And, never kick a fresh turd on a hot day.

[REWahoo]

Quote:

Originally Posted by MichaelB Yup. It's often better to be nice, than right. Tomorrow isn't always there. Life is a gift, being able to share it with others is real joy. Asking the right question is more important knowing all the answers. And, never kick a fresh turd on a hot day.

+1

I've learned every one of those! Unfortunately I often forget to put them into practice - except for that last one...

[6miths]

Quote:

Originally Posted by MichaelB Yup. It's often better to be nice, than right. Tomorrow isn't always there. Life is a gift, being able to share it with others is real joy. Asking the right question is more important knowing all the answers. And, never kick a fresh turd on a hot day.

Yes these are good ones. Just having come in from reaping the winter's bounty in the back yard... fortunately, neither fresh nor a hot day but man that's alot of cr@?...

Also learned that at some point time (and people to spend it with) becomes much, much more valuable than money.

Like ReEWahoo, I wish I could have put them into practice more frequently during my working life.

[cbo111]

As DW and I have aged, we both seem to have an increased frequency of visits to various medical "specialists." I used to think doctors could run tests and effectively diagnose most maladies. It turns out they can run a lot of tests, but often are left scratching their heads as to the cause and the treatment. I recently had a gastroenterologist tell me the 40% of the patients he sees for gut pain cannot be diagnosed.

[Accidental Retiree]

Quote:

Originally Posted by MichaelB And, never kick a fresh turd on a hot day.

And that. Thanks! 😝

[Koolau]

Specifically to OP point, If forced to pick on their relative merits to ER, I believe "good" saving is more important than "good" investing in the great scheme of things. Doing both, of course, is much better. I was always a good saver and a poor investor. But because I did save a lot, it gave me a chance to get "lucky" when some of my investments eventually paid off. Had I been more astute (or even more lucky) with my investments I could have been "rich" (whatever that is) instead of comfortable in retirement.

If nothing else, being a good saver (and accumulating a lot of savings) teaches one to live on less. That discipline can tide you over even better than some investment windfalls - which rely on luck instead of your own fortitude.

An earned level of self confidence is valuable. Unearned self confidence can be detrimental. Recognizing the source of your self confidence - priceless! YMMV

[LitGal]

+1 to most of the responses here (though I try to avoid meeting up with t____s, whether hot or cold).

But another habit I aspire to: being ready for Murphy's Law to kick in. It seems to show up more often than I'd like. So, if I can be braced/prepped for it, there's a chance I can avoid disasters, large and small.

[Elbata]

Quote:

Another thing I have learned is that it is tough to give up ideas that you have had for years, but to do so can be rewarding and informative and enlightening. I am much slower to give my opinion now because I am not sure I am right, and as I get get older I find myself questioning everything

Great topic. And thank you for this.

I often question myself about ideas I hold very dear. And a few of these ideas definitely do not fall in the mainstream. And these ideas cause me to live a life different from others on a daily basis. So it's something I've looked at with great introspection. Also to hold ideas and to live life different than those around me takes a hell of a lot of resolve.

Looking back at my life, I've gotten into belief systems that I now believe are wrong. One belief side tracked my life for a number of years. The other one that side tracked me, was a multi level marketing scheme. The second derailment didn't affect me nearly like my first one.

I'm thankful that I climbed out of ideas that I now believe false. I would say all on this board believe Islamic extremists, though very certain in their beliefs, are wrong. It takes courage to look at facts and allow for a new way of thinking.

[sengsational]

I am more open to alternate interpretations of reality than when I was younger. Much more so. I sometimes cringe at my former self for being so sure of something that I later learned was open for various interpretations.

Right now I think that the world would be a less violent place if fundamentalists of all stripes would give it up. But I'd listen to arguments to the contrary!

[52andout]

The thing that differentiated early retirees from wage slaves is living below your means and learning the basics of investing. Most of the ER delays we have seen have come from investing too much in one company stock, in appropriate level of risk(too much or too little), too good to be true or not understanding the investments and spending too much money.

Second is developing a life outside of work. Nurturing relationships with friends, relatives and groups, having hobbies and interests and staying active. At age 60 and I my ninth year of retirement the only regret I have was wasting so much money when I was younger instead of putting value on experiences and relationships. We could have been out by our high stress soul sucking jobs by our mid forties if we only knew.