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What is the craziest stunt you've ever pulled?
Old 06-03-2009, 08:45 PM   #1
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What is the craziest stunt you've ever pulled?

Here's one I remember....

Many years ago, my best friend and I were coming home from a night on the town. A night out on the town consisted of eating burgers and chasing boys. Anyway, we were headed home and I got an idea. I wondered how long I could hang on to the hood of a car, and how much speed I could take (no not the drug) before I cried "Uncle!"

It was late at night and since we lived in a rural area, traffic was not a problem. My friend was driving a brand new Ford LTD. She was more than happy to comply with my screwball idea; so she stopped, I got on the hood, told her to let it rip....and hung on. She started slowly, and then picked up the speed. After about 10 minutes she got the vehicle up to 55 mph and would not go any faster. I was so disappointed; that was one of the best rides of my life!

No drugs or booze were involved that night. Heh...I was 16.

btw....my friend decided she didn't want her turn....
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Old 06-03-2009, 09:08 PM   #2
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1. nocturnal nude bungee jumping.
2. weekend "date" with mafia don's daughter.
3. posting in the Soapbox.

I'm so ashamed.
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Old 06-03-2009, 09:18 PM   #3
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Bombed the local elks lodge with water balloons.

Friends and I were riding our little datsun pickup, you know, the kind that went from 1-60 in 90 seconds flat. We carried a bottle of water in the back in case the truck overheated somewhere. We happened to have some balloons with us from a party or something, and my buddy got the bright idea to fill up the balloons with water. We bombed a VW beetle. It hit the car right on the post of the opened wind wing and window...splattered the guy inside with water, and boy was he mad but couldn't catch us in that speedy pickup traffic.

Then went on to find other targets...and lo and behold the elks were just finishing their own party. My buddy lobbed a few balloons into the crowd while I gunned it and made our getaway. (I know, I know, doesn't sound like good ol' Rambler, does it? I've settled down a bit since then).

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Old 06-03-2009, 09:25 PM   #4
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What is the craziest stunt you've ever pulled?
Just one, eh?

If I had a nickel for every time I heard an enraged XO or chief of staff bellow out "Nooooooords!!" then I'd be ER'd by now...
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Old 06-03-2009, 09:33 PM   #5
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Oh boy! A Darwin Award thread.
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Old 06-03-2009, 09:44 PM   #6
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I don't remember. The doctors said amnesia was a common result of that kind of head injury.
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Old 06-03-2009, 09:53 PM   #7
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The one that ended

"Hey, hold my beer and watch this!"
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Old 06-03-2009, 09:59 PM   #8
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Stunt? I was a good boy, I don't know what you mean...

Of course there was the time when I was horsing around with my cousin and impaled myself on a rusty nail. And get this, I didn't impale myself on the sharp end of the nail, no, no, I impaled myself on a large, flat nail head which ended up lodging itself about 1 inch deep inside my bicep. As I pulled the nail out of my arm, the nail head pulled out a whole lot of flesh, muscle and blood with it... Five years ago, I found that nail again and I swear, it still had a little bit of my arm hanging from it...

And there was a time when I ended up with a dart planted deep in my leg, compliment of my other cousin...
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Old 06-03-2009, 10:23 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bbbamI View Post
A night out on the town consisted of eating burgers and chasing boys.
...
I wondered how long I could hang on to the hood of a car, and how much speed I could take (no not the drug) before I cried "Uncle!"
Good grief!

Reading other posts confirmed that I am the most straight and narrow guy I know.
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Old 06-04-2009, 01:08 AM   #10
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I played chicken with a military police jeep and won.
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Old 06-04-2009, 05:21 AM   #11
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Ah, to be young and stupid fearless again....

Here are a couple of the dumbest.

Sled wars - This event was organized by the neighborhood morons kids. The idea was to get a group on sleds going down a hill at breakneck speed and head in the direction of cars, particularly the snow plow, since we didn't want our street ruined for good sledding.

M-80 wars - My crazy Kansas cousins came up with the bright idea to place M-80s (powerful firecrackers) in apples and try to toss them so the explosion would splatter each other.
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Old 06-04-2009, 05:26 AM   #12
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I was never much of a daredevil, but more of a prankster. I dug this one out of an older thread.

...the worst "stunt" of my youth...

When I was a teenager, my girlfriends and I would put our babysitting money together and go buy 5 quarts of beer, one per girl. I was the only one who had the nerve to walk in and plunk the beer on the counter and pay for it without batting an eyelash. I was 5'7" and not giggly, so I could look the store owner right in the eye and pull it off. Drinking age was 18, so I was only 2 yrs short. Piece of cake.
So off we go in the station wagon. It was close to Halloween and Gate Night was very popular. So we bought some shaving cream on the way to drink our beer on a back road.
We lived near the lower Hudson River, just north of NYC. There was a long sea wall where the local young folks (over 18 rule) hung out. We were too young to be there.
I got the bright idea to drive by and spray shaving cream at the people hanging out there. So I and another girl hung our upper bodies out the windows and started spraying as we drove by.
We got cars, a few people, a few more cars, and the local police unit detective who just happened to be standing there.
The police car was parked way off the road so we never saw it. The shaving cream went all over his suit and tie.
He used to be a NYC cop and was very much feared by all persons in town. It was me who got him first.
In slow motion...I saw him look down, scowl, get really torqued off , shouting and pointing to the police cruiser to chase us. It was parked in the opposite direction TG.
We hightailed it right up the road to a local tractor trailer parking lot, quickly killed the headlights and hid the car behind all the rigs. We watched police cars go back and forth for hours, looking for us. They never thought to look just 1/10 mile down the road.
We cleaned the shaving cream off the car and ventured out 3 hours later.
We swore each other to secrecy. The story, of course, was all over town.
We never did get caught.

PS I later dated a local policeman, and socialized with the unit members. I never had the nerve to tell the detective I accidentally sprayed that it was me. I did feel bad about it because he was actually a decent man. Strict but nice.
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Old 06-04-2009, 05:31 AM   #13
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Well I learned that 1969 Barracudas (340S), 1971 Chargers (383 Magnum) and 1969 GTOs (400 Small Block) would all go 150 mph.

Competing against 4X4's in the bush outside Kirkland Lake with a 69 Fury police special and beating most of them.

I forget
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Old 06-04-2009, 05:43 AM   #14
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I climbed up a brick wall about 15 feet high to get back into the school dance (yes, I was a stupid teenager and had left the dance to drink).

The brick wall had sections where the bricks stuck out about an inch or two. I got on my friend's shoulders (yeah, she was drunk, too) and proceeded to climb, holding on for dear life with my fingertips and trying to keep my toes on the little bits of brick sticking out. My friends in the girl's bathroom (where I was climbing to) were waiting for me and grabbed a hold of me as I reached the window.

As soon as my trunk was through the window, my feet slipped out from under me. My friends held onto me as my feet swung back and forth. The windowsill pressed into my stomach, leaving red marks for a while, but no cuts. They pulled me through to safety. Success!

Stupid!
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Old 06-04-2009, 06:20 AM   #15
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Which one was the dumbest?

1. Using a slingshot to fire lit M80's into the air. In doing so the lit M80 was about an inch from my ear before launching.

2. Hill-jumping on a motorcycle at night. Couldn't see a thing.

3. Put a lit firecracker in a pile of dog doo and then diving over a nearby hill. My friend still remembers that because he almost didn't make it over the hill in time.

4. A friend had bought a new acetylene/oxygen welding torch. After a few beers I had the bright idea of snuffing out the flame, filling a gallon milk jug with the gas mixture, place the jug in a paper grocery bag and set the bag on fire. The resulting explosion almost blew out the windows of the school where we set it off.

5. Popping balloons with the propeller of a Piper J-3. Throw 'em out of the airplane, turn around and see if we could hit the balloon. (A Piper J-3 has a cruising speed of about 65 mph on a good day.)
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Old 06-04-2009, 06:44 AM   #16
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Y'all are some dangerous folks!
We regularly had bottle rocket wars, one ending with a sweater on fire.
We did a lot of naked drunken ocean swimming as teens that surely could have ended in disaster.
Stole one of those road block thingies with the flashing light on the top and then drove around trying to get the flasher turned off before the cops saw us.

Threw raw eggs in the public pool--a stupid prank, but we thought it was awesome.

One serious rite of passage in my hometown is to ride the Coburg cow. I decided to take my turn while my parents were on vacation and I was about 16 or so.
The Coburg Cow is a giant sign at the corner of a shopping center on Hwy 17, a main thoroughfare in Charleston. It has a large cow and a milk carton that spins around about 30 feet in the air, and was probably put there in the early 70s. You had to climb up the sign, jump on the spinning (albeit slowly) part, and then mount the cow. All this on a busy street (but we did our turn at about 2 am) near a police substation.

We didn't get caught, but it was quite a thrill! The Citadel students were famous for taking the tail off the cow--just about every time they replaced the tail, it was gone again. Now the sign has electrified wire around it in an effort to dissuade climbers.

That is about the extent of my stunts. Tell us more!
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Old 06-04-2009, 07:03 AM   #17
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I used to have an ultralight aircraft. My work place is in a rural area, and one day my boss said "You should fly your plane out on one of your days off and give us a fly-by." In a moment of inspiration I said "I'll do better than that. I'll air drop you guys a box of doughnuts for your morning coffee break."

He laughed, but I had put "Operation Doughnut Drop" in motion.

On the big day, I called work and told them which open field I had chosen as the drop zone. As I approached the field, I could see a couple of company trucks and several of my hungry coworkers awaiting the air show. The doughnuts were packed in a box with bubble wrap to cushion the impact. I had briefly considered, then rejected, the idea of a small parachute on the box. The aircraft had a pusher propeller configuration, and I figured the event would be ruined if it became entangled in the prop and caused me to crash

I circled in low over the field and back hand tossed the pastries from an altitude of about 50 feet (open cockpit plane) with an orange streamer attached to the box to aid in the recovery operation. They recovered the box and I proceeded to make a series of crazy low passes at an altitude of about 2 feet (I've since overcome my dangerous addiction to "weeds in the landing gear" flying
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Old 06-04-2009, 09:34 AM   #18
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Wow, some great stories here!

C'mon NW...I bet you've got at least one story.

One day while riding, I rode over a paved road. The horse didn't have the proper shoes... Well, let's just say my legs lengthened in a heartbeat and people swore I was riding a six legged horse....
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Old 06-04-2009, 10:28 AM   #19
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I have too many....you guys would think I was a danger to myself if I posted them........
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Old 06-04-2009, 10:30 AM   #20
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What is the craziest stunt you've ever pulled?
Sober? Work-related? Selling the ship's brow banner.

Yeah, I know. Those crazy wild-eyed hard-partyin' submarine nukes. But it was a symptom of job-related stress imposed by a CO's outsized ego.

For a time in early 1990s Pearl Harbor it became a fad for the submarines to compete amongst themselves to display the snazziest brow banner. (The, um, banner that's tied onto the submarine's ah, brow, to identify which particular submarine is tied up to the pier, because they all look alike. The standard-issue naugahyde banner usually says something classy like "USS NEW YORK CITY SSN 696".) The Cold War was over so, instead of beating up on the Russians, we hypercompetitive submariners had resorted to beating up on each other. I was the Weapons Officer, and it came to my CO's attention that I was responsible for acquiring a custom-made brow banner. Anything else was a distraction. Explosive safety, combat systems readiness, training, personnel advancements, department leadership, liberty, and a number of other unimportant concerns were kicked to the curb in order to obtain the ultimate vanity brow banner.

It wasn't as expensive or as painful as getting a custom paint job on a Harley-Davidson, but it involved a number of the same business personalities. We were using the CO's stash (of command funds) so in his opinion cost was no object. He thought that white canvas would be unique. (He was right-- there's a reason no submarine before or since has ever used white canvas.) He wanted a Technicolor airbrush scene of NYC's skyline and the ship's insignia along with the usual identifying info. So we came up with some photos, found an airbrush shop, and got started. The CO interfered offered a number of helpful suggestions, so for a couple weeks I turned into a highly-paid brow-banner courier. Many downtown trips later we had the &^*#'in' brow banner ziptied to the brow. I thought I was done with it and was ready to refocus on higher priorities.

Oh no. First the brow banner was getting dirty (in an industrial harbor?!?), necessitating frequent cleanings. Then it needed a few airbrush enhancements. Then the grommets weren't riveted in tightly enough. Then it was stretched out of shape. Then… you get the idea. Every time he'd cross the brow he'd "notice" something new. It was a difficult working relationship since the CO had a reputation as a detail-oriented micromanaging martinet with several intolerant racial/lifestyle prejudices and quite the foul vocabulary. He was also known for his somewhat good ol' country redneck tastes, too, so his idea of "classy" became a source of waterfront amusement and shipwide embarrassment. I saw it at the deckplates ("Sir, how much longer is he gonna make us suffer? Can't you do some of that officer leadership stuff and talk with him!?") but I wasn't aware that it was also generating some resentment at the rarefied O-6 and flag officer levels.

Fast-forward a few weeks to the annual Navy Relief Society charity silent auction. All the ships' wardrooms were expected to pile into the base auditorium and bid on each other's crap during an evening of camaraderie and professional fundraising rivalry. (We were all getting paid $10K/year bonuses and we were expected to put them to good use. It's for charity!) The event was on a Friday night but it was for charity so it was OK to cancel wardroom leave & liberty. Being the senior watch officer, I had craftily given myself the ship's duty so I had a legitimate reason not to attend. Everybody else marched off for mandatory auction fun.

An hour later I got a frantic call from the topside watch requesting permission to load his firearm. (For safety reasons, submarine sentries were not allowed to load their .45 caliber automatics.) He was confronting an aggressive guy in civilian attire who turned out to be the XO of another submarine. Said XO, with perhaps a frosty beverage or two affecting his cognitive processes, thought it would be hilarious to donate our brow banner to the Navy Relief auction for our XO to sell. He had just been "discussing" it with our skeptical topside watch, who objected and deferred to higher authority-- me. I hadn't heard of this plan, but if it involved getting rid of the &^*#'in' brow banner then I was delighted to help!

The bemused topside watch helped us clip off the zip ties and away the banner went. Smugly satisfied at having simultaneously solved several problems, I adjourned to my stateroom to catch a nap up on important department head business. Less than an hour later I (and the rest of the duty crew) heard the CO's command voice on the ship's announcing system: "#$%^ing Weapons Officer muster #$%^ing topside with the #$%^ing Commanding Officer #$%^ing ASAP." Ooops.

It turned out that the other XO had made a presentation at the auction without consulting our XO: "Ladies and gentlemen, next up for bid-- the NYC vanity brow banner!!" Huge crowd response, much hilarity and good-natured jibing. Our CO tried to buy it back but the admiral and the commodores, heartily tired of the stories they'd been hearing for the last few months, kept bidding him up. (Hey, it was for charity!) The CO, determined not to see his brow banner mounted on someone's office wall, finally won it back at $200. But then he had to make the long walk up to the stage to collect his merchandise. Having imbibed a few frosty beverages of his own, by the time he returned to the boat to discuss my initiative he'd worked up a pretty good hissy fit.

XO lectured me at length on my professionalism (or lack thereof) and the importance of supporting the chain of command and the boat's image. But I could tell that he was pissed at not having thought of this gag before his XO buddy.

I paid the CO back. It was worth every penny just for the story, but as an unexpected bonus we never heard any fuss about vanity brow banners ever again. If I'd known that I could have purchased that peace of mind for just $200 then the department would have taken up a collection…
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