Adult Children Inheritance

[Sunset]

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Originally Posted by RetireeRobert Have a SIL (wife's sister) who inherited an extra share at their mom's death. Wife and SIL had two brothers, and one is mentally disabled, in institution, and on SSI. Mother did not want to set up special needs trust for the disabled son. "Too much trouble and more legal expense" was the excuse. Instead, mother had her trust drafted stating that SIL would receive a half share instead of a quarter share, wife would get quarter share, and the other brother would get quarter share. Mother's intent was SIL would "caretake" the extra funds that would otherwise go to disabled brother. But it was on an "honor" system! Long story short, my wife is now passed, the other brother is now passed, and only the SIL and disabled brother are still alive. Disabled brother has no knowledge of his share held by SIL. And since he is a ward of the state, and can get SSI only if his assets do not exceed minimal amounts, he is likely to never "need" his share. So, SIL at this point can basically do with those funds whatever she wants. In fairness, SIL did do a lot of unpaid caretaking for mother before mother passed, so perhaps this entire situation is "fair" in the grand scheme of things.

I had a client in a similar position, so the family bought a condo apt with some of the trust money. Enabled the client to live in a nice neighborhood while still not owning any assets.
I couldn't afford that apt back then, as it was really nice.

[ZachTB]

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Originally Posted by RetMD21 I'm a fan of getting professional help for things that you do rarely. I am not an expert but we got a trust for its many advantages for our situation. I thought I wanted a professional trustee but out estate planning lawyer told us some stories and it turns out that my cousin was more than happy to agree to be the initial trustee.

That makes a lot of sense

[Rambler]

My parents’ setup is the same as the OP. If one of us kids precedes them in death, their estate is divide by one less sibling. That sibling’s kids receive nothing (monetary anyway). We haven’t been that specific with ours, but we are thinking about that and a few other stipulations. If the (currently hypothetical) stipulations aren’t met, that child would not have an inheritance and that portion would go to a third or fourth party. Said hypothetical stipulations revolve mainly around personal responsibility and things like substance abuse.

[RetireeRobert]

My wife and I had our RLT set up so that each of the three kids gets an equal share after we are both gone. Then it is "per stirpes"---If a kid predeceases us, then their children get that kid's share.

[catii]

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Not dividing equally seems unfair.

Not in all cases. My youngest sister lived next door to our parents, while I lived 3000 miles away, & our other sister was about 2000 miles away. I contributed, when asked, but youngest sister bought them a house, mortgage-free!, while other sister contributed zilch.

So, I wasn't surprised when parents' wills & trusts left most to youngest sister. I wouldn't have had it any other way.

[donheff]

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Originally Posted by Rambler My parents’ setup is the same as the OP. If one of us kids precedes them in death, their estate is divide by one less sibling. That sibling’s kids receive nothing (monetary anyway). We haven’t been that specific with ours, but we are thinking about that and a few other stipulations. If the (currently hypothetical) stipulations aren’t met, that child would not have an inheritance and that portion would go to a third or fourth party. Said hypothetical stipulations revolve mainly around personal responsibility and things like substance abuse.

Did your parents tell you why they cut out the orphaned kids? Do you and your siblings like this arrangement?

[isisdave]

Every case is different, so there's no universally "right" way.

Is it possible that when the first sibling died, the parents made a gift to her kids via some other method, so they could benefit immediately instead of waiting for their death?

[SpinDoctorTX]

"Our" inheritance from DD was zip. He left all to his 2nd wife which I expected, and at the time I told my siblings to expect nada and get over it. We too have mom & pop wills, with our mutual agreement that whomever outlives the other will make proper adjustments with a new will.

We hope to spend every extra dime we have together, leaving only real property to be sorted out.