Join Early Retirement Today
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 03-15-2018, 01:00 PM   #21
Moderator
Walt34's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Eastern WV Panhandle
Posts: 25,299
Quote:
Originally Posted by redduck View Post
You guys never thought about it? Was that due to lack of imagination or fantasy life, or was there nobody around that you could ask or even thinking about asking?
Only one relative (by marriage only) ever asked to borrow money. I'd been warned about her by my mother and an older half-sister 30+ years ago. She had a long history of borrowing money and never paying it back so it was easy to say "no".

She lives on SS income only and wanted to borrow $5k for a bankruptcy attorney. What she needed was $180k to pay off all her loans so there was no way I was going to throw $5k down that hole. I found out later that my two sisters and a cousin also received that phone call and had the same reaction.

As for myself, I never put myself in a position where I even had to think about borrowing from a relative.
__________________
When I was a kid I wanted to be older. This is not what I expected.
Walt34 is offline   Reply With Quote
Join the #1 Early Retirement and Financial Independence Forum Today - It's Totally Free!

Are you planning to be financially independent as early as possible so you can live life on your own terms? Discuss successful investing strategies, asset allocation models, tax strategies and other related topics in our online forum community. Our members range from young folks just starting their journey to financial independence, military retirees and even multimillionaires. No matter where you fit in you'll find that Early-Retirement.org is a great community to join. Best of all it's totally FREE!

You are currently viewing our boards as a guest so you have limited access to our community. Please take the time to register and you will gain a lot of great new features including; the ability to participate in discussions, network with our members, see fewer ads, upload photographs, create a retirement blog, send private messages and so much, much more!

Old 03-15-2018, 01:05 PM   #22
Recycles dryer sheets
 
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 297
We got married right out of grad school and immediately began paying off DH's 30k student loans. In 2 years they were paid off and we were shopping for a house and realized we didn't have the 20% down payment to avoid the PMI, so my folks offered to loan us 10k at the same rate as the mortgage (7% at the time). Figured we'd rather pay them the interest than the mortgage insurance fee... We paid them back in a year and have never owed anybody since.
igsoy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-15-2018, 01:06 PM   #23
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
haha's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Hooverville
Posts: 22,983
Quote:
Originally Posted by redduck View Post
As an adult (define this however you want) have you ever borrowed or thought of borrowing a large sum of money (define this however you want) from a friend or relative?
I borrowed $2500 from my Dad to buy my first new car, and I borrowed $2500 from father-in-law to retire some margin debt. Paid FIL back quickly, but I might have shorted my Dad a bit. Not sure, but I think I did. I am sorry for this.

Ha
__________________
"As a general rule, the more dangerous or inappropriate a conversation, the more interesting it is."-Scott Adams
haha is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-15-2018, 01:14 PM   #24
Moderator Emeritus
Ronstar's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Northern Illinois
Posts: 16,543
I borrowed $60k from my parents to build my first house. Couldn’t find a bank to give me a construction loan. Paid my parents back a year later when I finished the house and got a mortgage.
Ronstar is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-15-2018, 01:20 PM   #25
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Posts: 3,431
Quote:
Originally Posted by OldShooter View Post
Multiple choice question without all the possibilities considered. How about "Never got myself into a situation where borrowing from friends or family even needed to be considered."
+1

omni
omni550 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-15-2018, 01:31 PM   #26
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 8,359
Never had to.

But even if I did we all knew never to even consider asking. Even if your house had burned down, we knew the answer and it would just make it awkward for everyone concerned.

Grandpa used to joke that when it came to making loans to people in need, he was the first to put his hand in his pocket....and keep it there.
__________________
Living well is the best revenge!
Retired @ 52 in 2005
marko is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-15-2018, 01:36 PM   #27
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
 
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 1,763
Quote:
Originally Posted by redduck View Post
You guys never thought about it? Was that due to lack of imagination or fantasy life, or was there nobody around that you could ask or even thinking about asking?
Probably just smart!!!
splitwdw is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-15-2018, 01:48 PM   #28
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Upstate
Posts: 2,948
My dad cosigned on my first (used) car loan when I was graduating from college (the loan was from his very small credit union). Yes, I paid it off and fairly quickly. I had less than $500 to my name when I graduated and moved to another state away from my family at 20 years old. BUT, I had no college loans due to winning a half scholarship and working part time every summer (and also during the school terms), as well as going to school during the summers to be able to graduate in three years (with a double major).

When I retired I realized that the longest single vacation I had had from the time I entered college to my retirement was 10 days.
copyright1997reloaded is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-15-2018, 02:01 PM   #29
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
NYEXPAT's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Miraflores,Peru
Posts: 1,992
Borrowed 86k from a friend 6 years ago for a RE investment. It got paid off about a year ago with along with a 9.5%/year return.
NYEXPAT is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-15-2018, 02:03 PM   #30
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Milton's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 2,360
Quote:
Originally Posted by omni550 View Post
No, never. The thought never crossed my mind. I was not brought up in a family where we borrowed nor loaned money.
+1

Quote:
Originally Posted by Choices View Post
Nope. I heard my grandmother bring up time after time ( ad nauseum) how she had lent my parents money. They paid her back but were required to be beholden forever...not a road I wished to tread
Straight out of The Millionaire Next Door.

Quote:
Originally Posted by redduck View Post
You guys never thought about it? Was that due to lack of imagination or fantasy life, or was there nobody around that you could ask or even thinking about asking?
I've never thought about cheating on my taxes, either. Apparently that makes me a person of limited imagination or fantasy life; or perhaps I just don't know any 'creative' accountants.
__________________
"To know what you prefer, instead of humbly saying Amen to what the world tells you you ought to prefer, is to have kept your soul alive". Robert Louis Stevenson, An Inland Voyage (1878)
Milton is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-15-2018, 02:06 PM   #31
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 2,983
Granted we have a small family but the subject would never come up. Now if the kids were in trouble we would help them out, and have. However, not as a loan.
As far as friends go - not a chance. By the time they ask the friendship is probably over. Like the kids, if we feel the need to help, maybe.
__________________
Took SS at 62 and hope I live long enough to regret the decision.
foxfirev5 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-15-2018, 02:08 PM   #32
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
redduck's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: yonder
Posts: 2,851
Guess I'm in a pretty different place. I've met a whole lot of wealthy, free-spending people and sometimes it crosses my mind, "Hmnn, wonder what would happen if I asked this guy for $50,000? Maybe he would just reach in his pocket and just hand it to me." But, of course, I'd ask in my own unique and interesting way, so it wouldn't be offensive. Nobody here has ever had a thought like that?
__________________
When the people shall have nothing more to eat, they will eat the rich--philosopher Jean-Jacques Rousseau
redduck is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-15-2018, 02:10 PM   #33
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Milton's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 2,360
Quote:
Originally Posted by Walt34 View Post
She lives on SS income only and wanted to borrow $5k for a bankruptcy attorney. What she needed was $180k to pay off all her loans so there was no way I was going to throw $5k down that hole.
Wow.
__________________
"To know what you prefer, instead of humbly saying Amen to what the world tells you you ought to prefer, is to have kept your soul alive". Robert Louis Stevenson, An Inland Voyage (1878)
Milton is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-15-2018, 02:10 PM   #34
Moderator
Walt34's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Eastern WV Panhandle
Posts: 25,299
No, I hate being in debt. Feels like a sword hanging by a thread overhead because my future options and opportunities are limited by the amount of the debt.
__________________
When I was a kid I wanted to be older. This is not what I expected.
Walt34 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-15-2018, 02:14 PM   #35
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Milton's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 2,360
Quote:
Originally Posted by redduck View Post
Guess I'm in a pretty different place. I've met a whole lot of wealthy, free-spending people and sometimes it crosses my mind, "Hmnn, wonder what would happen if I asked this guy for $50,000? Maybe he would just reach in his pocket and just hand it to me." But, of course, I'd ask in my own unique and interesting way, so it wouldn't be offensive. Nobody here has ever had a thought like that?
Not even close.
__________________
"To know what you prefer, instead of humbly saying Amen to what the world tells you you ought to prefer, is to have kept your soul alive". Robert Louis Stevenson, An Inland Voyage (1878)
Milton is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-15-2018, 02:14 PM   #36
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Milton's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 2,360
Quote:
Originally Posted by Walt34 View Post
[D]ebt feels like a sword hanging by a thread overhead because my future options and opportunities are limited by the amount of the debt.
__________________
"To know what you prefer, instead of humbly saying Amen to what the world tells you you ought to prefer, is to have kept your soul alive". Robert Louis Stevenson, An Inland Voyage (1878)
Milton is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-15-2018, 02:15 PM   #37
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
candrew's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Cholula
Posts: 1,595
Decades ago, DW & I were in very rough spot finance wise. Two young children with health issues & numerous OOP medical costs that insurance did not cover.

Yes, we thought about asking to borrow from a friend or relative and didn't. That was mostly driven out of pride and feeling too ashamed to ask. We did, however, have the fortune of being on the receiving end of a few charitable acts. Someone stepped up anonymously and contributed a few hundred $$ on a hospital bill we were paying on. A friend of ours brought us groceries once. A laborer gave me a ride to work for a week when our car was broken down and there was no money to buy parts until pay day.

Thinking back, we could have no doubt qualified for public assistance like SNAP. Rolled pennies several times to cover groceries and had the embarrassing experience of returning a few items when our grocery bill went over the amount of cash we had at check-out.

On the flip side, as we became more FI, we've been able to help out family when they've needed it. It's never a case of us "loaning" them money, but rather gifting what we can afford.
__________________
“Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way, you’ll be a mile from them, and you’ll have their shoes.” – Jack Handey
candrew is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-15-2018, 02:16 PM   #38
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Posts: 3,431
Quote:
Originally Posted by redduck View Post
Guess I'm in a pretty different place. I've met a whole lot of wealthy, free-spending people and sometimes it crosses my mind, "Hmnn, wonder what would happen if I asked this guy for $50,000? Maybe he would just reach in his pocket and just hand it to me." But, of course, I'd ask in my own unique and interesting way, so it wouldn't be offensive. Nobody here has ever had a thought like that?
So, if you've thought about it and are meeting folks who might be prone to give you the money, and have a unique and interesting approach, why haven't you done it already?

omni
omni550 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-15-2018, 02:24 PM   #39
Full time employment: Posting here.
 
Join Date: Oct 2016
Location: Pinetops
Posts: 521
I ended up borrowing 20k from my parents back in the mid/late 90's. The purpose was to pay off my house. They charged me 6% interest and I ended up paying them back within a year and a half.

No more loans... I just don't do it.
__________________
I

ER 12/15/2017
Now: Side Hustle(r) Extraordinaire
IMATERP is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-15-2018, 02:27 PM   #40
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
 
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: the prairies
Posts: 5,027
I once lent a friend $500 cash (all I had) back in the early 80's when he missed getting to the bank before closing on a Friday and couldn't cash his pay cheque. Normally he would have waited until Monday but he was going out of town for 2 weeks. He paid me back the next time I saw him.

Other than that no one has asked me and I haven't asked anyone.
Music Lover is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Relative Needs Money - What Would You Do? DustyMom FIRE and Money 129 05-19-2017 01:24 PM
Thoughts on Relative that's bad with money JDARNELL FIRE and Money 29 12-31-2006 12:07 PM
Borrowing, Spending, Counterfeiting Editorial Mountain_Mike FIRE and Money 5 08-24-2005 12:28 AM
Borrowing money during retirement. proud_texan FIRE and Money 2 09-11-2003 05:05 PM
Borrowing from 401K vjmed1 Other topics 11 09-07-2003 02:49 PM

» Quick Links

 
All times are GMT -6. The time now is 02:14 AM.
 
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.