Emptying Nest Eggs, Not Nests--NYT

[flipstress]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Independent From the time they are little, kids hear "What do you want to do when you grow up?", not "How do you plan to support yourself when you grow up?". They expect they will be able to earn good money while doing something that's fairly enjoyable. They can even see examples of people who really do have jobs that fit them so well that "work" is almost a hobby. But they don't realize that those lucky people make up about 10% of the workforce. The remaining 90% settled for the least-unpleasant way they could earn a living.

That's a really good distinction between two big life questions. When kids are young, they're encouraged more to develop their interests and figure out what they like or want to do.

At some point, when they are older, then they do need to think about how they will support themselves. Reconciling making a living with what they like to do, finding a way to marry the answers to the two questions is a challenge.

I think it helps when parents and schools expose young people to the realities of different careers by hooking them up with friends that they can job-shadow or work with as an intern/apprentice. Reviews of salaries/wages in comparison with what "lifestyle" those would allow also help.

(I have no kids but in hindsight, when I was a youngster, some guidance like the above would've been valuable. But I really don't know if I would've listened well to advice or if I would've been thick-headed. Still, all parents can do is help in laying out options.)

[Alan]

Quote:

Originally Posted by flipstress That's a really good distinction between two big life questions. When kids are young, they're encouraged more to develop their interests and figure out what they like or want to do. At some point, when they are older, then they do need to think about how they will support themselves. Reconciling making a living with what they like to do, finding a way to marry the answers to the two questions is a challenge. I think it helps when parents and schools expose young people to the realities of different careers by hooking them up with friends that they can job-shadow or work with as an intern/apprentice. Reviews of salaries/wages in comparison with what "lifestyle" those would allow also help. (I have no kids but in hindsight, when I was a youngster, some guidance like the above would've been valuable. But I really don't know if I would've listened well to advice or if I would've been thick-headed. Still, all parents can do is help in laying out options.)

The advice thing is really tough. I think it is better to teach by example and make sure you have time to spend with them, and spend more of your discretionary spending on vacations and other experiences rather than things. May be then they will learn that work is what happens in between the weekends and you need to work to live rather than the other way around

[samclem]

This career counselor pretty much hits it on the head:

In part:

"I’ve come to the conclusion that we’ve been sold a bill of goods when we’re told to “Follow your passion, “ or “Do what you love and the money will follow.” Fact is, if you do what you love, you’ll probably starve.

Yes, some people do what they love and the money follows. But millions of people have followed their passion and still haven’t earned enough money to even pay back their student loans, let alone make even a bare middle-class living doing what they love."

Do What You Love -- And Starve?

But, I don't know how you'd actually induce a young person to internalize this information. Most are sure they'll be artists, actors, sports stars, or that they will stay kids forever.

[W2R]

Quote:

Originally Posted by samclem This career counselor pretty much hits it on the head: In part: "I’ve come to the conclusion that we’ve been sold a bill of goods when we’re told to “Follow your passion, “ or “Do what you love and the money will follow.” Fact is, if you do what you love, you’ll probably starve. Yes, some people do what they love and the money follows. But millions of people have followed their passion and still haven’t earned enough money to even pay back their student loans, let alone make even a bare middle-class living doing what they love." Do What You Love -- And Starve? But, I don't know how you'd actually induce a young person to internalize this information. Most are sure they'll be artists, actors, sports stars, or that they will stay kids forever.

You may starve (or may not), but at least you won't always wonder if you could have made it in that longed for profession. Life is not all about money!

Personally I would modify the advice to say, "Do what you love until the time if/when you bomb out, then do what you must".

[citrine]

Want2retire:

I definitely agree with you. I think that one should at least attempt to do something they love before just mindlessly following the corporate herd. If you really do fail following your passion, then you still have time to do what you need to.
My parents made me go to college to get that diploma....and I went and didn't do my best....just enough to get it and leave the house to pursue my freedom. If my creativity would have been nurtured instead of squashed....I am sure that I would have been a success in the art field. However, thank god that I did start pursuing it agressively this year and so far it is going wonderful.

[W2R]

Quote:

Originally Posted by citrine Want2retire: I definitely agree with you. I think that one should at least attempt to do something they love before just mindlessly following the corporate herd. If you really do fail following your passion, then you still have time to do what you need to. My parents made me go to college to get that diploma....and I went and didn't do my best....just enough to get it and leave the house to pursue my freedom. If my creativity would have been nurtured instead of squashed....I am sure that I would have been a success in the art field. However, thank god that I did start pursuing it agressively this year and so far it is going wonderful.

Citrine, congratulations on your accomplishments this year in the art field! I am so pleased to hear that you are pursuing your dream, even if it had to be delayed until you could. Good for you and I wish you the best!

[citrine]

Want2Retire:

Thank you....if layoffs come in Megacorp.....hopefully I will be able to pursue the art full time.

citrine

[Independent]

Of course, you could reverse the order. Do what you need to do now to make yourself financially independent. Then, do what you love.

We could even give that a name, something like "retire early"?

[Bigritchie]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Independent Of course, you could reverse the order. Do what you need to do now to make yourself financially independent. Then, do what you love. We could even give that a name, something like "retire early"?

Yea I really hate what I have done for the last decade, and my wife REALLY hates it, I keep telling her "honey we are retiring at 30, it isn't that bad", and she says "GET ME OUTA HERE!"

I do not think I would really like any work, although I do enjoy some good hard work, I cannot stand having my life influenced by outside forces, so with me, it was always, utter sacrifice so I can goof off the rest of my life.

[Fireup2020]

I believe my parents did not sacrifice their nest eggs for my brother and I. As a (former step-) parent, I used to tell J that we kept him in Boy Scouts so he'd be able to survive in the wilderness after high school because he would not be living at home with us anymore Even though the statement was delivered in a joking manner, he got the point (whew!) 22 and co-owner of a restaurant these days. (and not living with either parent!!!)

[Spanky]

Quote:

Originally Posted by haha Parents delaying retirement, depleting savigs and even taking out loans to support kids beyond college. "I just wish we coud get her an apartment in the Village." Ha

Sigh! They are not babies anymore.