Join Early Retirement Today
Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Old 08-12-2021, 05:05 PM   #61
Recycles dryer sheets
 
Join Date: Jun 2015
Posts: 311
I’m in a similar quandary but with a greater net worth. I have two independent 30 year olds that I want to start gifting to but don’t trust they have the maturity to manage it. And the last thing I want to do is disincentivized them from being productive citizens.

If your son has never lived on his own or learned how to budget and manage for himself, how do you imagine he will suddenly be able to handle a large inheritance? My two are self-sufficient and I worry about this greatly. Someone who has no experience with living on their own would need a trust managed by someone else or I don’t know that you will successfully achieve your goal of providing for your son for the rest of his life when you’re gone.
Joylush is offline   Reply With Quote
Join the #1 Early Retirement and Financial Independence Forum Today - It's Totally Free!

Are you planning to be financially independent as early as possible so you can live life on your own terms? Discuss successful investing strategies, asset allocation models, tax strategies and other related topics in our online forum community. Our members range from young folks just starting their journey to financial independence, military retirees and even multimillionaires. No matter where you fit in you'll find that Early-Retirement.org is a great community to join. Best of all it's totally FREE!

You are currently viewing our boards as a guest so you have limited access to our community. Please take the time to register and you will gain a lot of great new features including; the ability to participate in discussions, network with our members, see fewer ads, upload photographs, create a retirement blog, send private messages and so much, much more!

Old 08-12-2021, 07:50 PM   #62
Full time employment: Posting here.
Retch The Grate's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: San Francisco
Posts: 792
So based on what I've read on Big ERN's website (mentioned earlier in thread) a 3% withdrawal rate works on 60 year periods with basically any reasonable asset allocation, so my perpetual withdrawal plan is to do 3% but instead of inflation adjusting, just adjust up to 3% of my highest portfolio value, that way doing a better job of fitting to any increased growth while still remaining an indefinite historical success.
Retch The Grate is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-14-2021, 12:20 PM   #63
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
 
Join Date: Jun 2017
Location: Western NC
Posts: 3,633
Quote:
Originally Posted by HawkeyeNFO View Post
USMC drill instructor with a Smokey the Bear hat and a BIG voice might be just what the basement dweller needs!
Like I said...Guard/Reserve is part-time, he can continue to work on whatever project back at home most of the time.

My last kid in college will be joining the Guard to fulfill his military commitment since Uncle Sam paid his undergraduate tuition/fees.

In the particular military community he has already been approved to join there are lots of opportunities to network for lucrative civilian contractor jobs as well...win-win.
ncbill is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-14-2021, 01:27 PM   #64
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Sunset's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Spending the Kids Inheritance and living in Chicago
Posts: 13,888
Quote:
Originally Posted by pb4uski View Post
+1 It is hard to describe the positive psychological benefits of working and having a job and having your own money.... DS would have been content to sit at home and play video games if we had let him but we nudged him out of the nest.... and he is a much better person today as a result.

I like the idea of the Guard too.

Even with a full time job DS finds plenty of time to play video games.
+1

Besides, if OP's son took a job working for someone else, the pay would probably start at $70K /yr . He would be exposed to lots of other people (programmers, designers) at the company to spark great ideas for games/apps.

Lots of time after work to chase the $$$$ game money (which is really a LOT harder than someone not working at a game company thinks).
__________________
Fortune favors the prepared mind. ... Louis Pasteur
Sunset is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 08-14-2021, 01:36 PM   #65
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Sunset's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Spending the Kids Inheritance and living in Chicago
Posts: 13,888
Quote:
Originally Posted by HawkeyeNFO View Post
OP, does your kid have a medical or psychological condition? If the answer is "no," then he really ought to be moving out of the house. Sounds like he has a lack of discipline and/or initiative. Military can take care of that, if he qualifies.
Frankly, it might be the parents that need to go for some counseling on being a parent.
Silly as it sounds, it's not taught in schools and I have seen lots of parents making big mistakes with their "children" both young and adult children.

It could be the parents that are holding back the "child" , which can have a crippling effect on the child's life (career, marriage, friends, etc).
__________________
Fortune favors the prepared mind. ... Louis Pasteur
Sunset is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 08-17-2021, 03:48 PM   #66
Dryer sheet aficionado
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 27
Quote:
Originally Posted by pjigar View Post
So you can spend about 120k from your portfolio “forever” without diminishing portfolio value. Plus your 40K from SS. So total 160k is what I would spend.
Just a technical point, can’t *spend* $160k because of taxes which will be around (?) i don’t know maybe 15-20%
rai-zero is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-17-2021, 03:56 PM   #67
Dryer sheet aficionado
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 27
Quote:
Originally Posted by Joylush View Post
I’m sure there is some info missing. Why would any non- disabled 25 year be incentivized to be a productive adult if they knew they’d be supported by their parents for their entire life? That doesn’t make any sense.
+1
rai-zero is offline   Reply With Quote
We have a similar situation
Old 08-18-2021, 07:42 AM   #68
Recycles dryer sheets
 
Join Date: May 2020
Location: Midwest
Posts: 148
We have a similar situation

Quote:
Originally Posted by Joylush View Post
I’m in a similar quandary but with a greater net worth. I have two independent 30 year olds that I want to start gifting to but don’t trust they have the maturity to manage it. And the last thing I want to do is disincentivized them from being productive citizens.
Inlaws are beginning to distribute their large portfolio, beginning with dismantling the family corporation they established years ago that includes the children & grandchildren.

Our YA children (DS26, DD23 & DS21) will each be getting around $250K.
We have been talking about this for several months & how easy this money could be to fritter away--it FEELS like a lot but could easily be run through.
We suggested buying a home, though not really sure any of them is at that place in their life. So we are recommending investing.

DD is already very good with goals & saving so not too worried about her (and she is the only one who may be ready to buy a home).

DS21 is getting an accounting/business degree so he likely already knows to be wise; we have had discussions & he is on the same page as us.

DS26 has a Master's degree in sports psychology. He & a buddy moved to CA Jan. 2020 as his buddy is a budding musician (also has a Master's). They had no attachments, seemed like a good time. Yeah, couldn't predict a pandemic. So basically barely treading water for the last 18 months. And Sports Psych jobs were gutted (collegiate level) as well. He is moving back home next month.
I worry most about him as he feels lost right now. We assured him that he could live with us as long as he needed (He is hoping to get a job & NOT stay with us long--he has gotten used to living on his own). He WANTS a career but is frustrated right now. It will help to have him here to help encourage him to invest. I don't THINK the $ will disincentivize him to figure out his life...hope not. (he did express frustration that his siblings were "further along" than he is at 26...I reminded him we all expected that from his incredibly Type A sister & that his brother is exactly where he was at the same age...and that a Master's Degree IS something)

Having children was truly my greatest joy--but it is so difficult to see them in pain. Not trying to "fix" things but will be there for him if he needs help & support.
Librarian is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-18-2021, 08:45 AM   #69
Recycles dryer sheets
Lienlord's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2018
Location: Oklahoma City
Posts: 150
Is this a situation where a Trust could be established FBO the adult son? Parents could be Trustees while living, with a successor trustee (not son) designated after their death. An amount could be set aside now in separate investments, but controlled by parents. Upon their death, their remaining estate be added to the trust, with explicit instructions for future distributions.

We should remember that many cultural differences exist WRT children living at home. Multi-generational family living is the norm in many other countries.

We were fortunate that our youngest son lived at home all through his college years. He moved out 6 months after graduation and starting his career job. I still remember sobbing like a baby his last night at home; excited for him to start his life but sad this phase was over! He was 24 at the time, and only moved 5 miles away! LOL
My wife said it was clear I hadn't emotionally prepared for this eventuality!
Lienlord is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-18-2021, 08:47 AM   #70
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
ivinsfan's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 9,263
Lienlord in most of these multi gen cultures the younger generation is supposed to take care of the older generation!!!
ivinsfan is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-18-2021, 08:50 AM   #71
Recycles dryer sheets
Lienlord's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2018
Location: Oklahoma City
Posts: 150
Quote:
Originally Posted by ivinsfan View Post
Lienlord in most of these multi gen cultures the younger generation is supposed to take care of the older generation!!!
True, and maybe he does and will (just not in a financial capacity).
Lienlord is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-18-2021, 09:51 AM   #72
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
 
Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 1,077
My only comment is I'd just ignore the SS since it won't be there for the whole 70 years and once one of you passes, the increase in taxes alone may eat what the other is receiving.

Over that amount of time I'd be starting at 3% WR and just re-evaluate every few years as things evolve.
karen1972 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-18-2021, 09:55 AM   #73
Full time employment: Posting here.
 
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Dallas
Posts: 965
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sunset View Post
+1

Besides, if OP's son took a job working for someone else, the pay would probably start at $70K /yr . He would be exposed to lots of other people (programmers, designers) at the company to spark great ideas for games/apps.

Lots of time after work to chase the $$$$ game money (which is really a LOT harder than someone not working at a game company thinks).
+1. Almost everything (worth its salt) I learned, ideas or otherwise, was AFTER I started working. And I have a master degree!
pjigar is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-18-2021, 10:47 AM   #74
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
 
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 8,790
Just a thought for the OP. When they were younger, we used to pay one of our kids a stipend to do volunteer work at a science museum. They still had to work for their money, but they were around retired scientists and one or two Nobel laureates, which we hoped was an enriching and motivating environment for them. Also, it is easier to get and keep a job as a volunteer, but still gave them the idea they had to work to get paid (by us at that time). Being a docent also helped develop their social skills for paid work later on.
__________________
Even clouds seem bright and breezy, 'Cause the livin' is free and easy, See the rat race in a new way, Like you're wakin' up to a new day (Dr. Tarr and Professor Fether lyrics, Alan Parsons Project, based on an EA Poe story)
daylatedollarshort is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 08-18-2021, 12:20 PM   #75
gone traveling
 
Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 225
the answer could be as simple as keeping the yearly income down to the current medicare Part B Part D IRMAA Premium Brackets... unless you just like to give free money to the government... remember, medicare irmaa uses yearly income starting at 63 yrs old... the government doesn't like people who have saved lots of money over the years.. so in return they will fine your success by charging you more for medicare and SS taxes...besides the normal taxes on withdrawals....

https://thefinancebuff.com/medicare-...-brackets.html
dixter is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-18-2021, 12:28 PM   #76
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
pb4uski's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Sarasota, FL & Vermont
Posts: 32,246
Quote:
Originally Posted by karen1972 View Post
My only comment is I'd just ignore the SS since it won't be there for the whole 70 years.....
And from where does one acquire such knowledge?

The SSA's Board of Trustees.... who are more in the know, don't agree with you (nor do I).

Quote:
... Social Security’s cost will be financed with a combination of non-interest income, interest income, and net redemptions of trust fund asset reserves from the General Fund of the Treasury until 2035 when the OASDI reserves will become depleted. Thereafter, scheduled tax income is projected to be sufficient to pay about three-quarters of scheduled benefits through the end of the projection period in 2093. ...
2093 is 72 years from now.
__________________
If something cannot endure laughter.... it cannot endure.
Patience is the art of concealing your impatience.
Slow and steady wins the race.

Retired Jan 2012 at age 56
pb4uski is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-18-2021, 12:38 PM   #77
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
RunningBum's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Posts: 12,380
Quote:
Originally Posted by pb4uski View Post
And from where does one acquire such knowledge?
I think the comment was that SS for the OP and spouse would not be there for 70 years because it goes away when you die. If the son is not working there will be no SS either. Nothing to do with the state of the SS program itself.
RunningBum is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-19-2021, 02:17 PM   #78
Recycles dryer sheets
 
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 293
It is time for someone to grow up.
Life is tough and treating him like a child will assure that he will always be one.

Maybe you can go out with him and find an inexpensive apartment, tell him you will pay the rent for 6 months, provide a absolute minimum income stream to get by for 6 months and tell him he is on his own after that.

Unless he has some mental health problem he will be forced to grow up.
JJpop is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-19-2021, 02:38 PM   #79
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
pb4uski's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Sarasota, FL & Vermont
Posts: 32,246
Quote:
Originally Posted by RunningBum View Post
I think the comment was that SS for the OP and spouse would not be there for 70 years because it goes away when you die. If the son is not working there will be no SS either. Nothing to do with the state of the SS program itself.
Ah, I see.... totally misread it.
__________________
If something cannot endure laughter.... it cannot endure.
Patience is the art of concealing your impatience.
Slow and steady wins the race.

Retired Jan 2012 at age 56
pb4uski is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-20-2021, 08:48 AM   #80
Dryer sheet wannabe
DayVee B's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2020
Location: Wichita
Posts: 13
With 4+Mil, spend as much as you want. When you pass your son will get whatever is left. If you haven't equipped him with the skills to manage his own life and be responsible with money he might just fritter it away in a blink of an eye regardless of your "plan" to take care of him. The best thing you can leave your son is wisdom and the tools of self sufficiency, not a big pile of money with neither of the other two things.
DayVee B is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Long (I mean really long) time reader, first time poster bigreader Hi, I am... 6 09-20-2018 08:57 AM
How much time a week do you spend on investments dtbach FIRE and Money 44 11-06-2013 10:41 PM
Can anyone realistically generate long-term alpha? Olav23 FIRE and Money 29 05-20-2007 09:02 AM
Do You Ever Feel You Spend Too Much Time On The Forum Danny Other topics 27 04-13-2006 03:16 PM
How much time do you spend on the forum mickj Forum Admin 1 08-27-2005 12:35 AM

» Quick Links

 
All times are GMT -6. The time now is 12:34 PM.
 
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2022, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.