Pulling the Trigger is Tough!

[Kook]

I have been saving, saving, saving and living below my means for over 25 years. Now, at 57 (almost 58), I have accumulated 43x current spending and 30x projected spending, which includes health care and increased spending. DW is also bringing in anywhere from 60-100K per year in her job and she has no intention of giving it up just yet. Social Security also awaits.

For the past several years I have dreamed of having "enough" and quitting my high stress, high paying job. I have done OMY twice now.

I guess its the psychological aspect of being an accumulator and transitioning to the spending phase . I love accumulating - everything from money, hotel points, credit card points to pocket change. I have jars and jars of change.

I have my resignation letter ready and my corporate BS bucket is completely overflowing, but I am just having a hard time giving it up.


There is so much that I want to do and I know that I will never be as healthy, active and young as I am now and time is flying by. Yet....here I am.


Is it me? I know the time is right but what if its not? There is just such a finality to it because I will never make the same money once I resign. Anyone else have/ had this problem?

Man, is it tough!

[MRG]

You talked about me.

Took my VP being a real ah*le, getting verbally abusive because he was ignorant of technology(he was a VP of technology) towards me. After a friend said I should thank him for giving me freedom!

[Montecfo]

For me, it was the realization that each year you work is by definition one less year of pursuing life on your terms.

It's just math.

[MarieIG]

I do not think your "problem" is at all unusual.

There is a feeling of accomplishment that goes along with the accumulation.

[srblanco7]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kook I have done OMY twice now. I guess its the psychological aspect of being an accumulator and transitioning to the spending phase . I love accumulating - everything from money, hotel points, credit card points to pocket change. I have jars and jars of change. I have my resignation letter ready and my corporate BS bucket is completely overflowing, but I am just having a hard time giving it up. There is so much that I want to do and I know that I will never be as healthy, active and young as I am now and time is flying by. Yet....here I am. Is it me? I know the time is right but what if its not? There is just such a finality to it because I will never make the same money once I resign. Anyone else have/ had this problem? Man, is it tough!

It’s not just you. We’re sitting above our FI number and all options are on the table for us, including ER. We raised the bar to now include a couple years of cash cushion before we ER.

That being said, the perspective of those on this board who’ve made the ER leap is invaluable and one of the biggest takeaways is that good health is not guaranteed and once you have enough, time >>>> money.

[pacergal]

You are ready to retire. Sometimes it just takes a leap of faith that things will be OK.
That first morning of retirement, sitting drinking your coffee while others rush off to work is priceless!

[RockyMtn]

What are you waiting for? Try it for a year...if you don't like it go get another J*b. Really as simple as that in your case.

[RobbieB]

Already have the letter written, but haven't dropped it in the mail eh?

As long as your wife doesn't mind, why not? If she wants to work, she can work as long as she likes.

[ThunderFIRE]

I'm right there with you. What is supposed to be a happy life event is the most scary and anxiety-producing phase of life I've been through. It's taken me 6 months to convince myself that I will pull the plug this fall or early next year. Only time will tell if I have the guts to do it.

It is so hard to walk away during my peak earning years, so I have adopted the mindset that it is "one more week" and every Friday I think of what I could put my week of "extra" earnings towards...painting the house next summer, a vacation, buying our "forever" cars, etc.

Reading people's experiences on this site has been extremely helpful. I have been in a hard core career for 30 years and spent every extra minute on raising kids. What I've realized in the past few years of being empty nesters is that I never spent any time on me developing hobbies or friends outside of work.

The career treadmill is real. I don't have all of the answers but this forum has been a good place to learn from others that went before me.

Good luck!

[FLJim]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kook I have been saving, saving, saving and living below my means for over 25 years. Now, at 57 (almost 58), I have accumulated 43x current spending and 30x projected spending, which includes health care and increased spending. DW is also bringing in anywhere from 60-100K per year in her job and she has no intention of giving it up just yet. Social Security also awaits. For the past several years I have dreamed of having "enough" and quitting my high stress, high paying job. I have done OMY twice now. I guess its the psychological aspect of being an accumulator and transitioning to the spending phase . I love accumulating - everything from money, hotel points, credit card points to pocket change. I have jars and jars of change. I have my resignation letter ready and my corporate BS bucket is completely overflowing, but I am just having a hard time giving it up. There is so much that I want to do and I know that I will never be as healthy, active and young as I am now and time is flying by. Yet....here I am. Is it me? I know the time is right but what if its not? There is just such a finality to it because I will never make the same money once I resign. Anyone else have/ had this problem? Man, is it tough!

It's a life-change and not just about the money. You are saying goodbye to your 'work family', a daily routine, and (depending on your personality) your sense of being and belonging to an "organization". I retired at 62 and that was just 10 years ago. Our income is now double what it was the year I retired. (DW retired at 55.) Investments (dividends) pensions, and now RMD's from 2 IRA's and 2 401(k)'s, plus Soc Sec that we started at 62 has resulted in a net worth double in 10 years. I still see former colleagues (most retired) and really don't miss the daily grind and stress of deadlines. I was a massive "accumulator" like you, and investing was my hobby. I have been transitioning to a "spender" and getting better and better at it, and enjoying it. Just my 2 cents.

[flyingaway]

Same problem here. You are not alone. I just could not walk away from a job that I no longer like. But the money is good and I don't hate my job yet.
For me, I have just been doing what I want to do in retirement, if I find I need more time, I will just retire. I have lots of free time by working at a university, so needing more time is not a problem for me.

[Kook]

Thank you all for the great replies! I am glad I am not alone in my struggle.This really is an awesome forum full of thoughtful, friendly and positive people.

After reading the replies, it seems like such a no-brainer. A few of the responses really hit home for me, especially the one from Montecfo who said, "For me, it was the realization that each year you work is by definition one less year of pursuing life on your terms." Pretty simple, really. There is so much I want to do and time is ticking....

@ RobbieB - Yep, my resignation letter is typed and ready to submit! My wife is totally on board... in fact, she has been trying to get me to retire for some time.

I travel quite a bit for work and one thing I learned during my year of lock-down and no travel with covid is that I really like sleeping in my own bed at night. Now that I am traveling again, it is a struggle.

Thank you all again for your replies.... I may just pull the trigger this week!

[Nick12]

If you are going to work another year, get your medical and dental stuff done on the company's dime and time!

[finnski1]

Well I just posted this on a similar thread earlier today but it still seems appropriate.

[FLSUnFIRE]

I listened to this song quite a few times before I submitted my resignation:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T6bZ37nexSY

[Romer]

It is hard to let go. I still feel I am making a difference and could have retired last year. I was planning on seeing this current project through until the end of 2022

Then came a lot of BS and wasted answering curiosity questions from a new VP who doesn't realize that a question may take 10-20 hours to put all the data together. one or two questions now and then is expected, but now spending almost half my time doing that instead of what I am supposed to do

I initially told them Labor Day, but the person I hired for another effort and I would like to replace me is having surgery around Thanksgiving so I told them I would stay until the end of the year to make the transition easier. I should just go now, but just can't let go feeling obligated to my team (not the VPs) to make it as easy as possible

[1242Vintage]

Retirement really is my fountain of youth.

A little over a year ago at age 56 I walked away from a high stress high paying job. I feel so much better both mentally and physically now in retirement. It’s like the age clock has been turned back many years.

Prior to full retirement I did a “practice retirement”, taking 3 months off and simply wandered through Central America and the Caribbean with my wife. That sabbatical set me on the path to full retirement a year later.

[W2R]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kook I know the time is right but what if its not? There is just such a finality to it because I will never make the same money once I resign. Anyone else have/ had this problem?

Me too! There aren't many high paying jobs in Oceanography at all, and I had the only one I ever heard about that was in my specialty.

Actually the motivation this situation gave me, turned out to be an advantage. I knew that I just HAD to be sure before I retired. So, I kept track of my spending carefully, and checked my portfolio value each day. I beat the numbers on my spreadsheet to death until there was simply no question in my mind that I could afford it. I think this is a step that really helped me to accept that this was a rational thing to do.

[F.I.R.E User]

Did you use FireCalc to determine if you can retire?

[W2R]

Quote:

Originally Posted by F.I.R.E User Did you use FireCalc to determine if you can retire?

Me? Several times a week, among a number of other ways of beating my data mercilessly for information. Kook (the OP)? I have no idea.