Spending after Retirement

[NW-Bound]

I am trying really, really hard to get over a 2.3% withdrawal rate. I am going to get there. Just need to empower my imagination.

Earlier, you talked about fine dining.

A short time ago, I ran across a Web article talking about the 10 best restaurants in my town (a couple we have been to). It sounded interesting, so I researched them all to see if I should take my wife there. I looked at their locale, at their Web site to see the menu, etc... And there was only one that had an interesting menu. Interesting in the sense that I wondered how the dishes taste.

You see, when you know a bit about cooking, it's harder to be impressed. When you see a familiar dish, you know how to make that. And when you see something different, well it may not turn out to your liking, and there's a risk. Still, it's good to try something unusual, for a chance to discover something new.

I was going to take my wife to that place, and we most likely will have a good time, if not because of the food then for the different ambience.

But, then I forgot about it. Darn, I have to search for that article again to find that restaurant.

 

[COcheesehead]

Analysis paralysis

 

[Major Tom]

I have been thinking about what "blowing dough" means to me. It sounds like something extravagant that you would not normally spend money on. It has to be something out of the ordinary.

To me, blowing dough means wasting money. The word blowing implies waste to me. On occasion, I have spent money on something that turned out not to be worth it to me. However, all such episodes have been small amounts of money, so the feeling of waste dissipated fairly swiftly. I have never "blown" money on a large purchase, or even lots of small and medium purchases. Why would I regularly blow money? It makes no sense to me. I nearly always spend money on things that are either necessary, or that I enjoy. That, to me, is money well spent, and not blown.

 

[NW-Bound]

To me, blowing dough means wasting money. The word blowing implies waste to me. On occasion, I have spent money on something that turned out not to be worth it to me. However, all such episodes have been small amounts of money, so the feeling of waste dissipated fairly swiftly. I have never "blown" money on a large purchase, or even lots of small and medium purchases. Why would I regularly blow money? It makes no sense to me. I nearly always spend money on things that are either necessary, or that I enjoy. That, to me, is money well spent, and not blown.

I don't think people mean wasting money when they use the phrase "blowing the dough". I believe they enjoy the things they buy.

So, here's another meaning to the phrase. It means to spend money on something that you've always wanted but did not feel comfortable spending that much when you were still in accumulation mode. Now that your means have improved, and you can easily afford it, you need to permit yourself to spend that money. The money is not at all wasted.

Now, I like that better. Still, the word "blow" has a bad connotation. Maybe someone can suggest something better, but I am not good at language.

Using the above meaning, I will say that I need to spend money on something that I really enjoy: a business-class seat on international flights. I have been able to get my frugal wife to agree with me. Sadly, we made that decision after Covid started, and have not made any trip since. The extra expense hardly moves up my WR, and denying ourselves that comfort would be irrational.

 

[NW-Bound]

Analysis paralysis

We don't enjoy eating out all that much. It is rarely for the food, because we cook what we like to eat at home. Hence, when we go out for fine dining and need to dress for the occasion, I want it to be worth the trouble.

 

[RobbieB]

I go to restaurants that make stuff that I can't make at home. Some give me inspiration and I'm really happy if I can come close.

Sometimes I can best them and that's why we no longer go to steakhouses.

Caviar and truffles, XO and Don Julio 1942. Boat in a slip with a 80 gallon tank filling with marina gas which is 20% over street. Air in wagyu and lobster, some Jamon Iberico de Bellota. Yeah blow that dough!

Not everyday of course, otherwise it wouldn't be a treat eh?

Yeah, you think too much.

 

[Sunset]

This is our first year of retirement. Core spending is pretty much as expected. We had some "one-off" expenses, but our spending projection left room for that and I'm sure other "one-offs" will occur in the future.

.....
So the new and probably recurring item for us is gifting to the kids. We woke up to the fact that the estate tax exemption is scheduled to be cut in half in 2026 and the current tone from Washington makes me think that will happen. It's not clear that we'll ever get even to the lower estate exemption amount, but those cases in FireCalc where wealth heads to the moon show it should be considered. So at least while markets are good, we'll gift up to the gift exemption limit.

I have 2 cautions to mention:

1. Gifting to some kids, kills their desire to save/achieve/strive to succeed as they figure the parents can just pay.
2. The fantastic returns on the stock market last few years will in some years be balanced off by large negative returns for the year. If you gift away too much, you could end up literally short and hope your kids lend you some money for gas.

 

[W2R]

Anyone else seem to be spending more than you ever have in retirement and yet feel secure finically and at easy doing so?

While I was working, I pushed as hard as I could to save for retirement. My username here was "Want2Retire", and I really meant it. Now I am retired, and I no longer have to put aside money for retirement. So, I can spend more and I do. I still don't spend a lot because I don't especially want or need to do that in order to be happy.

I feel secure financially now. I did during my working years, too. That's because I have never spent more than I thought was prudent.

 

[RobbieB]

You go out and get yourself a deluxe cajun feast for lunch when you next feel chipper W2!

After your ordeal, that will be something to celebrate -

 

[W2R]

You go out and get yourself a deluxe cajun feast for lunch when you next feel chipper W2!

After your ordeal, that will be something to celebrate -

Will do!!! It's so nice to be enjoying life and feeling good these days.

 

[NW-Bound]

Not everyday of course, otherwise it wouldn't be a treat eh?

Well, once you have it, it's part of your normal daily life.

My biggest indulge has been the purchase of the 2nd home, and I did it when I was still working, and my stash was 1/3 the size it is now. Once I had it, it became another "everyday" thing in life. I then wanted to be a wanderer, so bought an RV to go to Nova Scotia, then Alaska. Then, I wanted to be wandering outside the country, and did some of that. I don't know what's the next thing to tickle my fancy.

People spend money to get some pleasure. I usually enjoy something with a little challenge. Right now, I am looking forward to seeing if I can grow snap peas without them succumbing to fusarium oxysporum fungus like they did last year. It does not have to involve money.

 

[2017ish]

I go to restaurants that make stuff that I can't make at home. Some give me inspiration and I'm really happy if I can come close.

Sometimes I can best them and that's why we no longer go to steakhouses.

Caviar and truffles, XO and Don Julio 1942.

...

Sounds like our approach to restaurants. Only steakhouses we've been to in the last 2 years were in Argentina--and, boy oh boy, were they an experience!

Agree on Don Julio 1942 as well--exquisite tequila. Sampled it several times at tasting events, and treasured the bottle given to me by daughter-in-law. BUT, the ~75-80 price was uncomfortable at the time; wish I'd have stocked up. Now that it is ~150, I just can't pull the trigger!

 

[sengsational]

I have 2 cautions to mention:

1. Gifting to some kids, kills their desire to save/achieve/strive to succeed as they figure the parents can just pay.
2. The fantastic returns on the stock market last few years will in some years be balanced off by large negative returns for the year. If you gift away too much, you could end up literally short and hope your kids lend you some money for gas.

I'm thinking HOW you give to the kids might be important, and also the kids' dispositions. If you wait for them to come, hat in hand, and award that behavior, that does seem to be setting up a dependency. But if you say "here's an advance on your inheritance" and hand them a giant check sporadically and unexpectedly, I'm less certain of that having a negative effect on behavior. My kids know me, and wouldn't come begging; I would ask where the last check went I like this approach because it puts me completely outside the wedding spending train wreck (should that eventuality manifest)...you have your money already...do with it what you will.

 

[aja8888]

I guess the $2,371.00 I dropped at the dentist yesterday does not qualify as "BTD" since this is the second half of a dental implant (first was the surgeon and implant stud placement - ~ $4000).

And I REALLY need the NEW TOOTH as it's replacing location #9 which was lost due to a upper gum infection.

 

[street]

aja8888, ohhhh yeah, I would say that is BTD.

 

[Major Tom]

I don't think people mean wasting money when they use the phrase "blowing the dough". I believe they enjoy the things they buy.

I agree with you. I believe they do mean that. However, for me, the world "blow" when used in reference to money, has a different meaning. Language and words are important to me, and it's hard for me to accept that a word means something very different from what I have long taken it to mean.

Many, if not most, here will disagree with me, and that's fine. We are all allowed to be ourselves!

 

[NW-Bound]

I guess the $2,371.00 I dropped at the dentist yesterday does not qualify as "BTD" since this is the second half of a dental implant (first was the surgeon and implant stud placement - ~ $4000).

And I REALLY need the NEW TOOTH as it's replacing location #9 which was lost due to a upper gum infection.

aja8888, ohhhh yeah, I would say that is BTD.

I beg to differ. Another thing that "Blow the dough" implies is that the expense is discretionary. Teeth are not optional, so I would regard the expense as mandatory.

Well, I guess if you compare the additional cost of an implant over a denture, then there's that.

 

[Major Tom]

I guess the $2,371.00 I dropped at the dentist yesterday does not qualify as "BTD" since this is the second half of a dental implant (first was the surgeon and implant stud placement - ~ $4000).

And I REALLY need the NEW TOOTH as it's replacing location #9 which was lost due to a upper gum infection.

I think I'm about to head in the same direction. My tooth at #1 has been problematic for a while. The crown was so thin at the top that it kept breaking. My dentist installed a gold crown, but that broke too. Then they cut away some of the gum, to give more bone for the new crown to adhere to. They also cut a groove in the top of what little tooth was left, to give the new crown something to "key" into, and to create more thickness and strength at the top of the crown. It seems to have worked, but now, there is an infection underneath it. This happened shortly after a knee replacement surgery, so I'm hoping the bacteria from the infection don't travel to the new knee implant. Yikes!

I have a consultation with the endodontist tomorrow, to see if they can save the tooth (I am guessing not). I'm sure glad I have the money to pay for it. I feel sorry for the legions of folk who don't have the extra money to pay for these types of dental procedures. This is definitely not BTD

 

[ShokWaveRider]

I am up there with RobbieB Do not budget, never will. We spend what we spend or want to, as we need to do so. I do however roughly track what our expenditures are, but only at a macro level.

The last 3 years All In have been 2020 = $55k, 2019 = $180k & 2018 = $46k This last year is gearing up to be around $65k. Nothing special occurred in 2019 other than some normal home maintenance and replacement of household items and spending a little more on vacations.

 

[Letj]

I beg to differ. Another thing that "Blow the dough" implies is that the expense is discretionary. Teeth are not optional, so I would regard the expense as mandatory.



Well, I guess if you compare the additional cost of an implant over a denture, then there's that.

Lol. They’re not optional? Tell that to most people who can’t afford implants.

 

[Happyras]

We enjoyed a trip to the oral surgeon a few days ago, and even stopped by our dentist on the way for a sharing of the wealth. Dentist had to cut the temp on my wife's #8 so the surgeon could extract the tooth and do a dead man bone graft. Nice way to blow $3k in one day with two visits.

However, I agree this is essential stuff not blow the dough. The BTD I found that day was checking the purchases on my wife's new Alaska Visa (gotta spend to get the bonus miles). Apparently we have so much money, in her mind, that buying $100 Xmas handpainted tree decorations is no big deal. Reviewing the several shipments on Amazon, this is well over $1K in these little boxes. To me, it is a real blow the dough. To my wife, she says she likes them and its not. Its all in your own perspective. Personally, I would rather have that better bottle of scotch.....oh wait why not!

 

[COcheesehead]

One person’s tracking is another person’s budget. We track about 5 broad categories (credit card, HC, utilities, sewer/water, misc cash) that make up all our expenditures and then bounce those off of a total derived from a detailed list of costs that we used to plan our retirement and plugged into Firecalc, Fidelity Retirement Planner, etc just to see if we are at, above or below trend.
We are only withdrawing about 2.3% and way under spending currently. So while not wasting money as some have called it, we don’t think twice about little luxuries along the way.

 

[Major Tom]

I am up there with RobbieB Do not budget, never will. We spend what we spend or want to, as we need to do so. I do however roughly track what our expenditures are, but only at a macro level.

I'm pretty much the same. Most of my expenses are recurring, and either the same, or close to, from month to month. I have an inbuilt sense for when my spending outside those categories, is uncharacteristically more than usual.

I know a lot of folk here enjoy tracking their spending down to the last penny. That's definitely fine, if you enjoy that. I prefer to keep track mainly in my head, on a macro level, as you put it. That's a good way of describing it.

 

[Major Tom]

Lol. They’re not optional? Tell that to most people who can’t afford implants.

Well, not considered optional for the likes of us!

I know people who, not being able to afford implants, simply had the offending teeth extracted, and put nothing in their place. I also know someone who should have had a tooth extracted, but didn't even have the money or coverage for a simple extraction. Actually, she *thought* she didn't have the money, but it was a combination of poor money management, and a serious lack of setting priorities. She just never seemed to get around to having the tooth extracted. Luckily, it didn't turn out badly for her.

Being able to easily afford dental work is a wonderful luxury that I am very grateful for. I'd hate to have to live with dental problems.

 

[RobbieB]

Well, once you have it, it's part of your normal daily life..

Nah, far from it. Don 1942 is Christmas present to myself. Order up the Snake River Farms stuff two to three times a year, same for Catalina Offshore. Been a few years since I did Truffles (whole white) and you have to really plan for meals with them as after 3 or 4 days the flavor declines.

Nah this stuff is not a part of "normal daily life" -