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24601NoMore · 08-21-2018, 01:30 PM

Hi guys..no need to be skeptical. This has been an excruciatingly difficult decision for me everything else aside.

As I've mentioned, I grew up poor. Not middle class - POOR. So, even the THOUGHT of walking away from a steady W-2 income is simply terrifying to me. I've lived through the days of literally not having ONE DOLLAR (true story) to do something we wanted to do. Those memories do not fade.

On the other hand, w*rk has become intolerable. Just today, I had a politically powerful co-worker mandate that she wanted something major from me in a completely unreasonable timeframe. I attempted to tactfully explain why we wouldn't be able to do that and what we COULD do, but of course my constantly "politics first, damn the people" Director cow-towed to her and said "of course we'll do that". As my Dad used to say, what do you mean "we", white boy? You got a mouse in your pocket? Of course, to meet the deadline would mean working 20 hours a day including 20 hours a day Saturday and Sunday. So, he can commit all he wants - I'm not meeting the date and don't give a rat's patookie.

I originally intended to quit yesterday and obviously didn't. It occurred to me I have a pile of expenses I hadn't really thought through yet (new roof @ $18K, new floor after a flood of ~$5K..landscape repairs of ~$4K..upcoming trip of $3-4K) that I didn't want to dip into my piggy bank for. So had considered staying another couple of months to pay for all that - but after today, all bets truly are off and I may just live with the dent to the piggy bank. As you guys have all said, it is simply not worth dying for - and if I keep this up, that's not completely out of the question. Staying here is unhealthy and I know it. The only question is if I can get up the cajones to "break up" with my company. It's not easy as you guys know, but at least I have a solid "Plan B". Let's hope it's as good of a plan as I've always thought it is.

REWahoo · 08-21-2018, 01:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RetireSoon

I originally intended to quit yesterday and obviously didn't. It occurred to me I have a pile of expenses I hadn't really thought through yet (new roof @ $18K, new floor after a flood of ~$5K..landscape repairs of ~$4K..upcoming trip of $3-4K) that I didn't want to dip into my piggy bank for. So had considered staying another couple of months to pay for all that - but after today, all bets truly are off and I may just live with the dent to the piggy bank. As you guys have all said, it is simply not worth dying for - and if I keep this up, that's not completely out of the question.

This is like the old serial movies - a cliff hanger at the end of every ~~episode~~ post.

Not sure if I want to keep coming back to see if the good guys win...

kimcdougc · 08-21-2018, 01:55 PM

You know the old saying "you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink"? This reminds me of that saying. Good luck OP but you can't just keep floating down the river. Just do it or suck it up and keep working. Life is short and getting shorter by the minute.

Good luck with your decision, either way.

Cassius King · 08-21-2018, 02:00 PM

As MY father used to say: "Sh!t or get off the pot!"

Time to move on.

24601NoMore · 08-21-2018, 02:08 PM

Hey..no need to keep reading if you're not interested. You asked..I updated.

Sheesh.

What part about THIS. IS. NOT. EASY. was unclear?!

Happy to keep my problems to myself going forward.

AS2019 · 08-21-2018, 02:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RetireSoon

Hey..no need to keep reading if you're not interested. You asked..I updated.

Sheesh.

What part about THIS. IS. NOT. EASY. was unclear?!

Happy to keep my problems to myself going forward.

Lol, this can be a tough crowd sometimes. It’s a good place to vent your frustrations, and I feel for you. I did ask for the update, so thank you.

ivinsfan · 08-21-2018, 02:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RetireSoon

Hey..no need to keep reading if you're not interested. You asked..I updated.

Sheesh.

What part about THIS. IS. NOT. EASY. was unclear?!

Happy to keep my problems to myself going forward.

What you are going to leave us hanging after all this. You got 125 posts of people giving you some empathy, sharing their own stories of trouble pulling the trigger, telling you how wonderful it feels to finally be free and of course those you told you no job is worth dying for.

Yet your followup to your followup to your drop dead deadline is a rehash of post number one. What more can we say?

kimcdougc · 08-21-2018, 02:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RetireSoon

Hey..no need to keep reading if you're not interested. You asked..I updated.

Sheesh.

What part about THIS. IS. NOT. EASY. was unclear?!

Happy to keep my problems to myself going forward.

After reading this whole thread, I think you really need to talk to a professional about this. You seem to want to move forward but just can't do it. If you don't do something, nature will decide for you in the form of a heart attack or something else.

All anyone on this thread wants for you is the best. We all worry about you. Just so you know we do care, but only you can make the decision where your life goes from here.

We are all here cheering you on.

God bless you and good luck.

Unpaintedhuffhines · 08-22-2018, 11:09 AM

OP, I feel your pain. Coming from a place of nothing to now something, and to walk away from a steady paycheck...what are you, crazy?!?

My FIL is 86. He's a high up University Professor. He just retired this week. Why did he work so long? Because he wanted to leave $ for his kids. Great, except we don't need it. His attitude is as long as you can make good money, why would you leave? When I pull the plug in a year or two (at age <60), he's going to look at me like I have lobsters crawling out of my ears, especially knowing how much money I make.

We are all going to leave something on the table. Ultimately it's a choice between money and your life. Early on, most of us don't have a choice - the money is not there to be FI, but later, many of us have that choice. You have that choice right now. There will always be that one more thing you want to fund right around the corner, or that stock that vests that is just "two months away."

I hope you find peace. I know the struggle is difficult. Here's hoping that you make the right choice for you and your family.

24601NoMore · 08-24-2018, 09:27 AM

Gave notice this morning. Boss did not seem surprised, nor did he make any effort to convince me to stay. He actually asked if I wanted to be done today or two weeks out. Told him I have a hundred balls in the air (which I do) and that I was not going to just dump everything on them. I'm still a professional - at least for two more weeks. But I in a way do wish I just took door #1 and said "today, thanks".

What's really weird is my Director who originally hired me at the company has not called. Thought he might just make some level of effort to keep me. Nope. Guess I now know where I really did stand and what they thought of me.

Wife was working at home today and I said "what did I just DO?" and she said "you just saved your life". Best friend texted his congrats and said "you just took a GIANT first step to reclaim your life, health and happiness".

Appreciate all the help. Now all I have to do is not freak out and all will be well.

- RS

pacergal · 08-24-2018, 09:31 AM

Good for you.
If your boss was comfortable asking if you wanted to be done today, he must have others who can take over those "hundred balls in the air". He gave you the option, and now you wish you had taken it. Any chance to go back and say "i'm outta here!"?
Start living your life--enjoy!!

ivinsfan · 08-24-2018, 09:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RetireSoon

Gave notice this morning. Boss did not seem surprised, nor did he make any effort to convince me to stay. He actually asked if I wanted to be done today or two weeks out. Told him I have a hundred balls in the air (which I do) and that I was not going to just dump everything on them. I'm still a professional - at least for two more weeks. But I in a way do wish I just took door #1 and said "today, thanks".

What's really weird is my Director who originally hired me at the company has not called. Thought he might just make some level of effort to keep me. Nope. Guess I now know where I really did stand and what they thought of me.

Wife was working at home today and I said "what did I just DO?" and she said "you just saved your life". Best friend texted his congrats and said "you just took a GIANT first step to reclaim your life, health and happiness".

Appreciate all the help. Now all I have to do is not freak out and all will be well.

- RS

Thanks for the update, believe me now you have made the decision you will start to feel better..Check in Monday and tell us how you feel...Congrats and listen to your spouse....

Sounds like you have a keeper she is concerned about your welfare and 100% with you on this.

24601NoMore · 08-24-2018, 09:33 AM

Actually, he doesn't have others who can pick it up. Everyone is working 80+ hours a week and is slammed silly. Plus, we just lost 2 other people (one pushed out to another job in the company and one who voluntarily took another role in the company) so they are down 2 horses on what was a pretty small team to begin with. I think he just didn't know what I was going to do or what to expect..if I did dump it all on them, it'd crush the people remaining - and I'm still professional..

ivinsfan · 08-24-2018, 09:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RetireSoon

Actually, he doesn't have others who can pick it up. Everyone is working 80+ hours a week and is slammed silly. Plus, we just lost 2 other people (one pushed out to another job in the company and one who voluntarily took another role in the company) so they are down 2 horses on what was a pretty small team to begin with. I think he just didn't know what I was going to do or what to expect..if I did dump it all on them, it'd crush the people remaining - and I'm still professional..

This all might be true but it's not on your shoulders.....stick to your plan and don't worry about what happens when you are gone..

24601NoMore · 08-24-2018, 09:37 AM

I could still use the 2 remaining weeks of income and healthcare coverage. Not huge in the grand scheme of things but when the W-2 spigot is turning off for good, I'll take every penny I can get..plus, I'm somewhat old fashioned in that you don't just walk out the door and try to transition things professionally.

trirod · 08-24-2018, 09:38 AM

Congrats!

Does this mean you will be changing your user name??

24601NoMore · 08-24-2018, 09:38 AM

I did take the rest of today off and sure enjoyed spending an hour at the local park. I can get used to that..surprised how many people of working age were there. Guess it is a Friday. Will be interesting to see it on a Tuesday..

24601NoMore · 08-24-2018, 09:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by trirod

Congrats!

Does this mean you will be changing your user name??

Hey, that's a good call. How do you do that?

corn18 · 08-24-2018, 09:46 AM

Congrats! I know this wasn't easy. Not sure I would have any more courage to do it any differently, so I empathize with your struggle. Don't burn any bridges on the way out in case the market tanks next week and you need some PT work.