We tried to live within a budget, but we can't

[livingalmostlarge]

Rework the budget and feel better about the actuals. Considering how much I spend and how I shouldn't be spending now, feel good you have everything under control.

I also don't like how so many people on FIRE talk about living a very "modest" lifestyle so much so that they chase away those who don't live a lifestyle or are embarrassed about sharing it. It's next to impossible to be honest on a board if you are tied to well i really spend $60k a year on groceries/eating out...traveling...etc. That you FIRE or are at FIRE but are supporting your family of 4 and traveling costs $40k.

I say that because there have been years recently where I am blushing at our spending. But do I really need to? Should I have to? I guess that's an important question to consider.

How to make everyone in FIRE feel welcome.

 

[RetiredHappy]

Rework the budget and feel better about the actuals. Considering how much I spend and how I shouldn't be spending now, feel good you have everything under control.

I also don't like how so many people on FIRE talk about living a very "modest" lifestyle so much so that they chase away those who don't live a lifestyle or are embarrassed about sharing it. It's next to impossible to be honest on a board if you are tied to well i really spend $60k a year on groceries/eating out...traveling...etc. That you FIRE or are at FIRE but are supporting your family of 4 and traveling costs $40k.

I say that because there have been years recently where I am blushing at our spending. But do I really need to? Should I have to? I guess that's an important question to consider.

How to make everyone in FIRE feel welcome.

My observation is that if you are FAT FIRE, the crowd here really don't want you to post because they don't believe that you are spending so much, or that they cannot understand how you can be so wasteful by their standards.

 

[Amethyst]

I think we are just seeing what happens to a long-time chat group when external trends change.

When I joined in 2009, the focus was on "I'll do whatever it takes to break the shackles and live my own life without working for somebody else." We had grand discussions of uber-frugality, since for many, that was the only way they'd ever see FIRE. Still is.

In the intervening years, the economy has dealt different hands; some people have so much, they wonder how they'll ever get rid of it all before they die. In addition, many in the "boom" generation have received their inheritances.

So, it's just a phase. Soon we'll be welcoming the toothpaste-tube-squeezers, the teabag-reusers, and those of us (you know who we are) who tear the half-paper-towel sheet into 2 pieces.

 

[aja8888]

Corn, why fiddle with all those categories? Life is much simpler when you just focus on "money in vs money out". If things get out of hand with money out, just look into where it went and fix it if necessary.

That's all we focus on after decades of looking at every penny (which now is meaningless to us since our life is less complicated). I have a small spread sheet with just a few entries by month.

Income in (SS, pull from savings)
Income out (Bank pulls - cash, CC spent, automatic payments).

At the end of the year, I have a picture of whether or not we are spending according to plan. And the plan is to not end up broke someday!

 

[CardsFan]

So, it's just a phase. Soon we'll be welcoming the toothpaste-tube-squeezers, the teabag-reusers, and those of us (you know who we are) who tear the half-paper-towel sheet into 2 pieces.

Guilty as charged.

 

[skyking1]

We are not going to be FAT Fire by any means, but if we were I would be OK with sharing those things that make me happy. For me, FAT would mean aircraft, possibly a big sailboat too.

 

[RobbieB]

Yeah. Me too. I took a lot of scrimping and saving and investing to get here and I'm not fat either. Just overweight -

But yeah, if I can't celebrate an ounce of white truffle (my first ever) in my retirement, then why bother?

 

[NW-Bound]

Yeah. Me too. I took a lot of scrimping and saving and investing to get here and I'm not fat either. Just overweight -

But yeah, if I can't celebrate an ounce of white truffle (my first ever) in my retirement, then why bother?

An oz of white truffle is not a problem. Not even if one has not reached the FIREd status. I don't think an oz of truffle has bankrupt anyone.

But when you have white truffle delivered daily, in addition to who knows what else, then there might be a problem.

Just might be, because if one is a centimillionaire, not even a billionaire, then there's definitely room in his budget for an oz of truffle a day, even if he cares to eat that much truffle.

 

[skyking1]

I would need to up my cooking game before i went there, but that is all it would take!
I did the plane thing in my youth, a sort of inversion of the normal processes. I could go back there though.

 

[NW-Bound]

So, it's just a phase. Soon we'll be welcoming the toothpaste-tube-squeezers, the teabag-reusers, and those of us (you know who we are) who tear the half-paper-towel sheet into 2 pieces.

Oh yes! The Wh*** has been sounded, and it is still reverberating around the world.

Have you read about China US-listed stocks losing $800 billion in just 2 days?


PS. Eh, speaking of half-paper-towel sheet, I noticed that the roll of kitchen towel we are using is already perforated at 1/2 sheet size.

Darn! I am telling you, this shows it is catching on.

 

[Amethyst]

Mon dieu! Surely, you didn't think I meant merely tearing a whole square sheet in half? Oh, the profligacy of mankind!

OK,, I'll stop calling you Shirley

PS. Eh, speaking of half-paper-towel sheet, I noticed that the roll of kitchen towel we are using is already perforated at 1/2 sheet size.

.

 

[Gumby]

Straining the broken glass out of the peanut butter was the best of the early days.

 

[NW-Bound]

Mon dieu! Surely, you didn't think I meant merely tearing a whole square sheet in half? Oh, the profligacy of mankind!

OK,, I'll stop calling you Shirley

I read your post again, and indeed you were talking about turning 1/2 sheet into 1/4 sheet.

And so, the 1/2 sheet is now the standard-size sheet.

I need to watch out to see when TP makers follow suit.

 

[FlaGator]

I think we are just seeing what happens to a long-time chat group when external trends change.

When I joined in 2009, the focus was on "I'll do whatever it takes to break the shackles and live my own life without working for somebody else." We had grand discussions of uber-frugality, since for many, that was the only way they'd ever see FIRE. Still is.

In the intervening years, the economy has dealt different hands; some people have so much, they wonder how they'll ever get rid of it all before they die. In addition, many in the "boom" generation have received their inheritances.

So, it's just a phase. Soon we'll be welcoming the toothpaste-tube-squeezers, the teabag-reusers, and those of us (you know who we are) who tear the half-paper-towel sheet into 2 pieces.

Didn't know my wife has been sharing her frustrations with you

 

[JJpop]

If you have plenty of money and this spending does not really matter, throw away the budget and enjoy your life.
Why are you even thinking about your wife spending on clothes.
There must be a reason.

 

[skyking1]

It's the closet thing. OP just needs to stay out of the closet.

 

[daylatedollarshort]

FWIW I am glad you started this thread.
Some folks confuse having a yearly budget as being rigid or perhaps frugal.
This can be true, but in general it is not.
There are just some folks including me that like to play with numbers/have a budget so we can see where the monies go/have a guideline if cuts might be made in the future, etc etc etc.

That describes me. I like my different spreadsheets and playing around with them. Not overpaying for ongoing expenses leaves more money for the big things, like remodeling our house, helping our adult kids buy houses, and having enough cushion to not have to worry about stock market crashes, high inflation or out-living our money.

 

[kcowan]

When we reached under 2% wd rate, I said to DW: "No more budget, buy what you want!"

Because of long established budget thinking, things are in check but running at a higher %.

We still drive a 2016 Mercedes and a 2017 Kia Soul. But have seen increases in food and air fare (business class). We also equipped our new snowbird condo with excellent quality stuff. We now feel poor returning home!

Main downside is the need to crystallize capital gains more often, creating a budgetting challenge. Been retired for 19 years.

 

[newlyold]

You budgeted $1500 per month for food? That's crazy! $300 per month is plenty for all the groceries for my wife and me could possibly eat, and even includes leftover funds to eat out if desired. But we don't desire eating out--not at COVID-19 prices.

Figure out how to buy groceries & cook for yourselves and you'll save a ton over eating out every meal. I can't imagine how anyone could spent $1500 / mo just for food.

Or am I misunderstanding your numbers?

 

[NW-Bound]

When we reached under 2% wd rate, I said to DW: "No more budget, buy what you want!"

You should be grateful that she did not go out and buy an Hermès bag.

 

[ivinsfan]

You budgeted $1500 per month for food? That's crazy! $300 per month is plenty for all the groceries for my wife and me could possibly eat, and even includes leftover funds to eat out if desired. But we don't desire eating out--not at COVID-19 prices.

Figure out how to buy groceries & cook for yourselves and you'll save a ton over eating out every meal. I can't imagine how anyone could spent $1500 / mo just for food.

Or am I misunderstanding your numbers?

Show us exactly what you eat for around 10 dollars a day and we'll kick the tires. Or show us your entire budget and we'll find a place where we think you overspend and we can call it "crazy"...point is you aren't me and I'm not you, that would be boring anyway....

 

[ivinsfan]

When we reached under 2% wd rate, I said to DW: "No more budget, buy what you want!"

Because of long established budget thinking, things are in check but running at a higher %.

We still drive a 2016 Mercedes and a 2017 Kia Soul. But have seen increases in food and air fare (business class). We also equipped our new snowbird condo with excellent quality stuff. We now feel poor returning home!

Main downside is the need to crystallize capital gains more often, creating a budgetting challenge. Been retired for 19 years.

That's pretty ideal you didn't undershoot your budget numbers or feel deprived. Isn't that what we all want, no matter the amount we spend each year?

 

[CardsFan]

You budgeted $1500 per month for food? That's crazy! $300 per month is plenty for all the groceries for my wife and me could possibly eat, and even includes leftover funds to eat out if desired. But we don't desire eating out--not at COVID-19 prices.

Figure out how to buy groceries & cook for yourselves and you'll save a ton over eating out every meal. I can't imagine how anyone could spent $1500 / mo just for food.

Or am I misunderstanding your numbers?

WADR, Why do you care?

 

[Dtail]

You budgeted $1500 per month for food? That's crazy! $300 per month is plenty for all the groceries for my wife and me could possibly eat, and even includes leftover funds to eat out if desired. But we don't desire eating out--not at COVID-19 prices.

Figure out how to buy groceries & cook for yourselves and you'll save a ton over eating out every meal. I can't imagine how anyone could spent $1500 / mo just for food.

Or am I misunderstanding your numbers?

The actual expense is $2,000, so don't worry about it.

 

[corn18]

You budgeted $1500 per month for food? That's crazy! $300 per month is plenty for all the groceries for my wife and me could possibly eat, and even includes leftover funds to eat out if desired. But we don't desire eating out--not at COVID-19 prices.

Figure out how to buy groceries & cook for yourselves and you'll save a ton over eating out every meal. I can't imagine how anyone could spent $1500 / mo just for food.

Or am I misunderstanding your numbers?

I budgeted $1500 but we are spending $2000.