What changes/sacrifices have you made so that you can have ER/FIRE?

[srblanco7]

Remember there are literally tens of thousands of folks who were more virtuously frugal than all on this board, who now have nothing to show for it due the circumstances beyond their control. As we pat ourselves on the back, it is also important to remember how fortunate we really are.

That's a fair comment. A combination of good choices and good fortune has put us in fair circumstance to fund ER in the near term. And though financial success is not the only measure, it's worth noting that there are many who could be in a similar circumstance but have made choices that will preclude this from being the case.

 

[JustCurious]

"Sacrifice" is in the eye of the beholder. To me, sacrifice means giving up something you want in exchange for something else.

"A people": These folks really want that $50,000 new car (for example) but choose to sacrifice their wants and buy the $10,000 used car because it makes more financial sense to them. The A people would be sacrificing their current wants for a future goal, perhaps financial independence.

"B people": These folks have no desire for that $50,000 new car, and are more than happy buying the $10,000 used car that gets them where they want to go. The B people are just living the life they want and perceive no sacrifice at all because they did not want the $50,000 car.

Some A people would look at B people and perceive that the B people made a sacrifice, even when the B people don't feel like they sacrificed anything at all. These A people are judging the B people on an A-person's value system, rather than the B-person's value system.

I must say this is very perceptive indeed and I agree. This is how I feel about houses...I don't understand the need or desire for some people to have large new homes with bonus rooms and granite countertops and upgraded everything, I am quite happy in a modest and comfortable home that provides all the comforts I need and I don't want the higher costs, maintenance, repairs and taxes associated with that. It's just a different value system and some people don't get it.

 

[Exchme]

Well, we're not "early retirees" at 61 and 60, but ended up with more than we will ever need. I was going to give a laundry list of all the things we saw others spend money on that we didn't, but then realized that was the wrong framing.

Financial success is about a reframing your mindset to balance your lifestyle so it is sustainable once you've retired. That means living below your means while working, investing regularly in low cost index funds and having confidence that your approach is right. If you feel you are "sacrificing", you either haven't really achieved the right balance between tastes and means yet or you are letting the spending of others give you a feeling of missing out.

In our early years, DW and I used to argue about money as I am cheap, but DW would spend money like water. She often excitedly told me about all the stuff she didn't buy - apparently only buying half of everything in the store was a great feat of restraint. Given her upbringing of never having much, maybe it was.

She eventually got over most of that and I got better about spending enough to ensure the big things we bought were good quality. Once we achieved that balance and gained confidence that saving and investing was going to work, we never again felt like the things "we didn't buy" meant we were sacrificing.

 

[athena53]

25 years ago, I divorced a gal I was otherwise enamored with because of a continuing pathological lack of financial self control. Does that count ? That is the biggest standout as a financial action/event in my life.Your choice in spouse (or lack of) can really either make or break you.

I divorced a spendthrift husband (there were additional issues but this was a biggie) in 1997. He had very expensive tastes and I'd say the major
sacrifice" I made was not doing any European travel, which I yearned to do (had made a couple of trips before we met) but would have meant cutting back on savings. It wasn't a priority of his but he had other expensive priorities and was a financial train wreck. To him, any available credit was money he could spend.

Seven years after the divorce I married a man who shared my priorities, including travel. Neither of us wanted to buy the most expensive house we could afford, or buy new cars every year or eat in fancy restaurants except on special occasions. Even with travel we were pretty much in agreement on when to go cheap and when to splurge and I was a wizard at getting freebies from the loyalty programs.

We were blessed with a good joint income so I'd say it was less "doing without" and more of setting financial priorities so we could LBYM.

ETA another thought- career/motherhood decisions. I spent the first 8 years of my career studying for actuarial exams in my spare time while working FT. I studied harder than I ever did in college- the pass ratios ran around 40% (with the competition just as smart and driven as I was) and every time I passed one they threw more money at me.

I postponed motherhood till I was finished, so I was 31 and knew I was rolling the dice with fertility but was blessed with DS at age 31. I would have liked a second but it never happened. I'm profoundly grateful for DS. I also went back to work 6 weeks after he was born. TBH, I liked my career and wanted to do that but I know I missed a lot and those were very hectic years.

I know I was fortunate- people who do hard work such as cleaning airport bathrooms and digging ditches work harder that I ever did- but I did make some decisions early in my career that paid off in the long run.

 

[NgineER]

We’ve bought less toys and a very affordable houses.

Kept the car wife brought into the marriage for twenty years until our fourth child forced us to upgrade to something bigger. Tried selling it for what it was worth, ~$800, no takers. Raised the price to $1,200 after a week and it sold within two weeks without any haggling.
We’ve been a one car household for the last 15 years and I’ve biked to work, year round on the east coast where winters were milder and commute was shorter. Car pool winter time and bike summers now in MN where the commute is too long and winters too cold.

At about FI now with rental income and want to pad the cushion and exit in ‘24-‘25 time frame at about 50. Do enjoy my job, so might work longer if I can go down to 60%.

Dropped down to 80% a year ago with no regrets, so don’t know if I can call that a sacrifice.

 

[Out of Steam]

Remember there are literally tens of thousands of folks who were more virtuously frugal than all on this board, who now have nothing to show for it due the circumstances beyond their control. As we pat ourselves on the back, it is also important to remember how fortunate we really are.

It's very clear to me that my life could have turned out badly. Physical or mental health, accidents, job loss, alcohol, or sticking with the difficult social environment I grew up in could all have done it.

 

[Chuckanut]

• Use mass transit to commute to work and keep the old car running better and longer.
• Stay in K12 teaching rather than allow myself to be lured back to COBOL programming for the Year 2000 effort. The extra $'s would end up being less valuable than the pension years I would have given up.
• Buy a smaller house.
• Refinance smaller house to a 15 year mortgage.
• Avoid buying a boat, motor home, vacation timeshare, etc.
• Boxed wine.
• Avoid eating out to often.

 

[Free2030]

Haven't retired yet. The sacrifice I'm making now is using my evenings/weekends to study for another certificate so I can be paid more at my job. It's cutting into time I have with my kids and adding to my stress level. Fortunately it's only for another month. If I pass the test, then it'll be all worth it. If not, I will try again in a few months as I don't give up easily.

As for LBYM, it's no sacrifice for me. I've always managed to save a lot and am happy shopping for used clothes, etc. We still manage to travel quite a bit -- I think we've been to 47 countries by now, hoping to pass 50 countries later this year when COVID restrictions are lifted. Before kids, I was very good at traveling frugally and finding deals. Those long-distance bus trips were actually the best adventures. Now I feel like we're becoming pickier as our kids need a quiet place to nap, etc.. Also I travel for work a lot, and the hotels are usually pretty good, so I'm getting a little spoiled. But I'm trying to not let it spill into personal travels and inflate our lifestyle.

I also try to take as many overseas assignments as possible due to corporate-paid housing and much cheaper childcare than the US. That's not a sacrifice but a happy coincidence.

 

[Athermos4u]

My wife and I drive thirteen, and fifteen year old luxury sedans. But we don't drive right now anyhow, so it's not much of a sacrifice. But not paying $1,000 a month in payments, insurance, and ad valorem sure is nice.

 

[FIREflower]

Remember there are literally tens of thousands of folks who were more virtuously frugal than all on this board, who now have nothing to show for it due the circumstances beyond their control. As we pat ourselves on the back, it is also important to remember how fortunate we really are.

I've been lurking since my intro thread because I feel I'm too far out of this group's expectations to mesh well, but this thread and this comment in particular is bringing me out of the shadows, at least temporarily.

I'm a "young dreamer", my husband and I both have pretty serious physical and psychological disabilities that interfere with employment, but while we aren't getting handouts for it last year we did receive an inheritance, so we've also had help. Here are some things we've done:

Lived in an RV, cooked all meals from scratch in the RV (!), worked for landlord in exchange for rent discount.

For a torturous time DH and I worked full time opposite shifts - he'd arrive home around 2:30am while I was asleep, I'd wake up around 7am to leave for work, and by the time I arrived home from work he had already left for his shift. We were contributing 50% to retirement accounts through employers and quietly scrambling to pay bills. The fact that I contributed 50% for a year straight and didn't max out the Simple IRA limit indicates how little income we were receiving and how little we were living off of.

Now we are in a paid off house, and the sacrifice is of a different nature than your question--we're sacrificing comforts so that we DON'T have to sacrifice our health and sense of wellbeing, as others in this thread have done so, to w*ork. Currently squeaking by on about $700/month in relaxed online self employment gigs so that we don't have to touch our investments.

- We are living with our thermostat at 60
- We keep our water heater turned down very low, only raising it in advance of a planned shower
- Unplug/turn off electronics when not in use, even the router at night (yes, the hassle of doing this adds up to a measurable difference on our bill!)
- All food cooked from scratch at home
- Barely drive anywhere (our car is 20 years old, was a wedding gift)
- Rarely use toilet paper
- Don't have or use a dryer, let alone dryer sheets (hah)
- Taking a long hiatus from buying things. This is a zillion little sacrifices. I love gardening and animals and I want both. Currently I've started a ton of seeds (obtained free!) in egg cartons and boxes and yogurt cups, and instead of buying seed starter I sterilized a large container of soil in my oven. Our curtains are sheets and other fabric we obtained for free. Our furniture is borrowed or free.

So to sum up, we went through a period of sacrificing our physical and mental health to save up, broke down and realized we'd rather sacrifice on the other end of things at this phase in our lives, to get by with very little so we have plentiful time and a flexibility in life to focus on our health and reconnect with what we want out of life.

 

[DrRoy]

Depending on the year, we deferred the short term benefit of spending 15-30% of our income so that we could ER at 57. Now we are well funded and much enjoying the ability to Blow That Dough on travel and remodeling the house.

 

[ncbill]

I've been lurking since my intro thread because I feel I'm too far out of this group's expectations to mesh well, but this thread and this comment in particular is bringing me out of the shadows, at least temporarily.

I'm a "young dreamer", my husband and I both have pretty serious physical and psychological disabilities that interfere with employment, but while we aren't getting handouts for it last year we did receive an inheritance, so we've also had help. Here are some things we've done:

Lived in an RV, cooked all meals from scratch in the RV (!), worked for landlord in exchange for rent discount.

For a torturous time DH and I worked full time opposite shifts - he'd arrive home around 2:30am while I was asleep, I'd wake up around 7am to leave for work, and by the time I arrived home from work he had already left for his shift. We were contributing 50% to retirement accounts through employers and quietly scrambling to pay bills. The fact that I contributed 50% for a year straight and didn't max out the Simple IRA limit indicates how little income we were receiving and how little we were living off of.

Now we are in a paid off house, and the sacrifice is of a different nature than your question--we're sacrificing comforts so that we DON'T have to sacrifice our health and sense of wellbeing, as others in this thread have done so, to w*ork. Currently squeaking by on about $700/month in relaxed online self employment gigs so that we don't have to touch our investments.

- We are living with our thermostat at 60
- We keep our water heater turned down very low, only raising it in advance of a planned shower
- Unplug/turn off electronics when not in use, even the router at night (yes, the hassle of doing this adds up to a measurable difference on our bill!)
- All food cooked from scratch at home
- Barely drive anywhere (our car is 20 years old, was a wedding gift)
- Rarely use toilet paper
- Don't have or use a dryer, let alone dryer sheets (hah)
- Taking a long hiatus from buying things. This is a zillion little sacrifices. I love gardening and animals and I want both. Currently I've started a ton of seeds (obtained free!) in egg cartons and boxes and yogurt cups, and instead of buying seed starter I sterilized a large container of soil in my oven. Our curtains are sheets and other fabric we obtained for free. Our furniture is borrowed or free.

So to sum up, we went through a period of sacrificing our physical and mental health to save up, broke down and realized we'd rather sacrifice on the other end of things at this phase in our lives, to get by with very little so we have plentiful time and a flexibility in life to focus on our health and reconnect with what we want out of life.

Amazing and inspiring...thank you very much for your post!

 

[MrsHaloFIRE]

Ignoring how our peers spent their money is our secret to success. Essentially. Never try to keep up with cars, houses, vacations, restaurants, personal grooming appts, domestic servants or expensive hobbies. Trying to cultivate like-minded friendships. Knowing what truly has value. Living in what amounted to half of one income and investing the rest.

Now we relax while former peers make payments. Time is the real luxury

 

[SmallCityDave]

I've been lurking since my intro thread because I feel I'm too far out of this group's expectations to mesh well, but this thread and this comment in particular is bringing me out of the shadows, at least temporarily.

I'm a "young dreamer", my husband and I both have pretty serious physical and psychological disabilities that interfere with employment, but while we aren't getting handouts for it last year we did receive an inheritance, so we've also had help. Here are some things we've done:

Lived in an RV, cooked all meals from scratch in the RV (!), worked for landlord in exchange for rent discount.

For a torturous time DH and I worked full time opposite shifts - he'd arrive home around 2:30am while I was asleep, I'd wake up around 7am to leave for work, and by the time I arrived home from work he had already left for his shift. We were contributing 50% to retirement accounts through employers and quietly scrambling to pay bills. The fact that I contributed 50% for a year straight and didn't max out the Simple IRA limit indicates how little income we were receiving and how little we were living off of.

Now we are in a paid off house, and the sacrifice is of a different nature than your question--we're sacrificing comforts so that we DON'T have to sacrifice our health and sense of wellbeing, as others in this thread have done so, to w*ork. Currently squeaking by on about $700/month in relaxed online self employment gigs so that we don't have to touch our investments.

- We are living with our thermostat at 60
- We keep our water heater turned down very low, only raising it in advance of a planned shower
- Unplug/turn off electronics when not in use, even the router at night (yes, the hassle of doing this adds up to a measurable difference on our bill!)
- All food cooked from scratch at home
- Barely drive anywhere (our car is 20 years old, was a wedding gift)
- Rarely use toilet paper
- Don't have or use a dryer, let alone dryer sheets (hah)
- Taking a long hiatus from buying things. This is a zillion little sacrifices. I love gardening and animals and I want both. Currently I've started a ton of seeds (obtained free!) in egg cartons and boxes and yogurt cups, and instead of buying seed starter I sterilized a large container of soil in my oven. Our curtains are sheets and other fabric we obtained for free. Our furniture is borrowed or free.

So to sum up, we went through a period of sacrificing our physical and mental health to save up, broke down and realized we'd rather sacrifice on the other end of things at this phase in our lives, to get by with very little so we have plentiful time and a flexibility in life to focus on our health and reconnect with what we want out of life.

That's quite the story thanks for chiming in. I thought I was "hard core" giving up trash service for a few years....


Living in an RV wouldn't be ideal but what a huge upgrade to living in a minivan. Congratulations on living in your paid off home! I'm sure that's a great story and I'd love to hear about living off of $700 a month and what that budget looks like.


I think what you've done is give up a LOT of today's modern day conveniences but what you have in return is your life and your time.

 

[RunningBum]

FIRE became possible early for me with company stock options. Bonuses didn't hurt either. I saw a lot of very nice cars in the lot as people cashed in options. I finally bought a used Miata. A co-worker told me how they bought jet skis with their bonus. I put my bonus in the investment account. I didn't deprive myself, and made no huge sacrifices, but I didn't go crazy with my newfound wealth either, and didn't get sucked into what many co-workers were doing.

 

[Shanky]

When I was younger, I was pretty, sure I had pulled myself up by my bootstraps and expected others to do the same. Now that I am older and hopefully wiser, I recognize I need to work on gratitude and empathy.

 

[brett]

Apart from the usual of avoiding consumer debt, living below our income etc I believe the largest contributor was taking advantage of opportunities.

Reaching for more opportunity, life long learner, and astute enough to recognize a great career move that came with a relocation away from our home of 20 plus years.

I learned long ago that working hard is not enough. You also have to work smart and not be afraid to venture into into new territory, new opportunites.

I have a few in laws who never wanted to move out of their home town. Few well paid jobs, not much opportunity. They never wanted to leave mommy, and then the kids, and then friends. As a result they are left, among other reasons, with a retirement that is far from financially secure. They did it to themselves yet they seem to think that we were just 'lucky' If they only knew.

 

[Out-to-Lunch]

When I was younger, I was pretty, sure I had pulled myself up by my bootstraps and expected others to do the same. Now that I am older and hopefully wiser, I recognize I need to work on gratitude and empathy.

+(some very large number)

 

[NYEXPAT]

I lived a "Charmed" life, and I am grateful!

 

[FIREflower]

That's quite the story thanks for chiming in. I thought I was "hard core" giving up trash service for a few years....

We tried to give up trash services. Our city won't let us.

Thank you for the kind words. I'll see if I can bring myself to delurk a bit more in the future to share more details about the budget.

 

[Retch The Grate]

Really don't feel I made any sacrifices. Changes feels strange to describe it as too, I did spend about $2500 out of the $15000 I made in my first half year of work out of college in 1994 on a bunch of Magic cards and a cool 24 bit graphics card, that in retrospect I wish I'd invested instead. I started reading the Motley Fool FIRE board that year, so everything that has happened with my finances just feels like growth rather than change or sacrifice.

 

[gayl]

A few things:
> worked for the government. Could have made 15% more in private industry but wanted a pension
> divided all raises in 3rd. [1] retirement savings [2] debt inc mortgage [3] lifestyle creep. Most coworkers gave it to lifestyle creep
> divorced a cocaine-addicted husband when I could no longer afford to support him

 

[rodi]

As so many others have said - the changes/sacrifices were deliberate and didn't seriously impact the quality of life.

1) Maxed the 401k... Most coworkers/peers just saved to the match.
2) Made excess principal payments on mortgage.... Many coworkers were refi'ing and pulling cash out of their house/piggybank
3) Didn't turn my nose up at hand-me-down toys/clothes from friends with kids a few years older.... Kids go through clothes so fast they don't get worn out, they get outgrown... Often I'd pass the hand-me-downs to another family after BOTH my boys had gotten use out of them. (Sorted by stain level, lol.)

Not trying to keep up with the Jones was a big thing. It's easy to feel a pang of envy when the neighbor gets a new boat... or redoes their backyard pool into a super resort spa... or pulls a new mercedes into the driveway.... But I've seen more than one of those neighbors have to short sell or get forclosed on during the housing crunch in 2008-2009.

We managed to take our kids to Europe every few years and pay off our house and save enough to retire before the kids were even out of high school. So any "sacrifice" of stuff/material goods was totally worth it.

 

[2cheap2eat]

Great job on driving a 22 y/o car it will get you where you need to go just as well as a new $40k car. Too many people focus on gas mileage, safety and reliability and forget that a car is to get you from point a to point b.

I’d disagree in the point a newer model (not new though) would have better safety features. No point of planning for retirement if your mangled or dead in a car wreck! I don’t care about gas mileage over safety. I do live in a big City with heavy traffic.

 

[HMMY]

We were fortunate to have steady jobs with great benefits that allowed us to save and invest. We lived in a small 2-BR with 1-BA for 4 people, but it wasn't a sacrifice because it let us live in our preferred neighborhood, travel extensively, save for 2 college tuitions, and ER. Ironically, now that I'm retired, we're finally buying a larger home with 2 bathrooms just as one child is leaving for college. We should have bought it earlier but I was afraid an expensive home would derail ER.