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Old 05-05-2020, 07:50 AM   #141
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In the 1970s, although not Jewish (many/most of us in the weight room weren't), I used to work out at the Toronto mantra was reinforced after hearing, (and this is true, not a Buddy Hackett line), one little old lady say to another "Never pay retail" other words "Don't piss your money away".

I don't need much, and I have it.
"Exit, pursued by a bear."

The Winter's Tale, William Shakespeare
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Old 05-05-2020, 08:01 AM   #142
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Hearing some familiar things. Definitely tried to impart the 'never pay retail' on the kids. Also, 'you save 100% on something you don't buy'. Also had the morning paper route starting at 11 - so hated March!! Parents worked to be middle class. Grandparents had families during the depression and WW2. Never saw the point of having too many things and really seeing the anchors they can be now.
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Old 05-05-2020, 08:15 AM   #143
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I love reading this thread !

I consider myself to be frugal, in part because I don't like wasting $$.

Like others, DH and I prefer to save $ on monthly bills, etc so that we can spurge later on travel.

I grew up as 1 of 6 kids and we all have different spending habits.

I am openly proud of my frugality with my only sister. We love to discuss the deals we found at a thrift store or gently used items found at curbside .
Some of my friends are not frugal, and like to talk about all the clothes, etc they bought. But they have to keep working to sustain that lifestyle which is not for me.

DSis and I learned from our parents to buy "good value" real estate, fix it up ourselves, and supplement salary with rental income.
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Old 05-05-2020, 08:16 AM   #144
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I feel like for me it is hard wired...I always had a save some for later mind set. DW is the same and we don't waste anything. We are however enjoying the fruits of our labor....trying to blow some of the dough.
FIRE'd---4/27/2018 @ 54. DW--RE date 03/01/19.
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Old 05-05-2020, 08:21 AM   #145
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I wouldn't consider myself frugal, but I did come to a place in life where I gained perspective. Sure, I'd like more stuff that money could bring, but I realize that I'm good. When you are honestly satisfied, it's not hard to stay in that place and for me, that place is pretty darn good. I could spend more and I could have made more, but I like the decision I made to relax, save money, retire and live out my days in a level of peace and quiet that just doesn't require a lot of money. Of course all discussion of money is relative, but I live below my means and when things like what happened in 2008 and is happening now, it pays off in that I can still search my soul and come to accept that I'm okay. Far less stressful way to live.
Every day when I open my eyes now it feels like a Saturday - David Gray
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Old 05-05-2020, 08:36 AM   #146
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My mom was very frugal and my dad was spendthrift. Two very opposing views of money, I do not know how they stayed married for so long. Dad almost drove family to bankruptcy, mom saved us. That is why I'm frugal. I saw from a young age the benefits of being frugal. On the other hand, my brothers learned from my dad and are spendthrifts as well.
"Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail."

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Old 05-05-2020, 08:57 AM   #147
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My wife's father was a railroader making 2x a normal salary for the 50's, however he drank up all the $ in honkey tonks. They lived in a tiny apartment with 5 kids in 1 bedroom. One chicken would feed 7 people--for 3 meals. A treat was getting a hot dog on a bun--once a year. No sugar was in the house. No car, no phone, no television.

I was son of a utility company worker, and he was raised in The Depression. We never hired anything done. We fixed plumbing, did electrical work and built a house. My mother went to work to put my sister and me thru college. My parents were just the greatest people, and so were their friends that raised me.

We lived well enough, but my wife and I remain frugal which allowed us to ER. Our luxuries are European travel, a inherited lake house, a RV in the mountains and a nice home. We saved enough to raise our 8 year old granddaughter that we have custody of.

I'm proud of my sister and her husband's success. But I don't agree with her having a personal Learjet to fly grandkids to rock concerts and vacations in the islands. She's had to live with a functioning alcoholic who refuses to retire. And she's miserable physically at age 73 after having one too many skiing accidents.
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Old 05-05-2020, 08:59 AM   #148
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Having parents who lived through the Great Depression, over thinking every expenditure was ingrained in me as a child.

There are degrees of frugality though.

I probably spend more on things I value (travel, eating out, cycling, wine) than others on here would, but in relation to my assets, its still a small amount.

My wife gets mad at me when I overthink buying new underwear.
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Old 05-05-2020, 09:27 AM   #149
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I was raised by parents who lived through the depression. They were frugal, and instilled that in all three of us kids. Even though I have more than enough to last me my life time, I am still frugal. It's a habit I haven't been able to break. Maybe when I get even older and realize it's okay to open the purse strings.
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Old 05-05-2020, 09:30 AM   #150
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We are not frugal when it's something we really want. Many would consider us spendthrifts in certain areas. Yet, frugality in other areas has allowed us to indulge the occasional spendthrifty urge.
If you understood everything I say, you'd be me ~ Miles Davis
'There is only one success Ė to be able to spend your life in your own way.í Christopher Morley.
Even a blind clock finds an acorn twice a day.
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Old 05-05-2020, 09:42 AM   #151
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I feel like the circumstances of my youth just sort of conspired to make me frugal. We lived in a rural location during my formative years and the main play activity for my friends and myself was to just go outside and play in nature. Build forts; play "baseball" using a broken branch as a bat, pine cones as the ball, and bushes or trees as the bases; football games with a nerf football; hiking and general exploring; that sort of thing. My parents gave me an allowance, but they didn't take me to the store very often, so I didn't really have much to spend it on, or much that I wanted (probably because I wasn't exposed to very many products). I had a happy childhood, so over time I think I came to the subconscious realization that I didn't need to buy things to have fun.

To this day, that seems to have stuck with me. I'm not necessarily actively frugal, I just don't feel a need to buy much.
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Old 05-05-2020, 09:52 AM   #152
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Idiot parents who didn't seem to know where babies came from and weren't able to plan more than 15 minutes into the future.
People who were always complaining about money but weren't interested in doing anything about it.
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Old 05-05-2020, 10:00 AM   #153
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I grew up in a poor household with a lot of debt. I didn't want to struggle like that my whole life so I have lived very frugally my whole adult life. My average income in 21 years of working is only around $28,000/yr and that will likely not go up but I have lived on well under that and plan to continue to do so. I know I will not be physically able to work until traditional retirement age so I need to save all I can now to retire early.
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Old 05-05-2020, 10:03 AM   #154
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Iím not frugal in many things, but I dislike waste, particularly when it comes to food. It always bothered me when food ends up spoiling in the refrigerator or going past itís prime flavor, just because of my lack of planning. So much food wasted! Now that Iím retired, I have become more organized and do things like freeze smaller portions of bacon or smoked ham so that very little goes to waste. Dry goods such as flour or rice are kept in sealed containers so they stay fresher longer and less risk of pantry pests. It has become even more important now, with our less frequent trips to the grocery store.
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Old 05-05-2020, 10:06 AM   #155
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I wasn't really raised to be frugal- in fact my family makes fun of me sometimes. My husband swears I was switched at birth. I was discussing it with my friends and one pointed out that I seem to have a cost benefit analysis program running in my head. I am completely willing to splurge on something I love and will use, but opposed to spending on something that will become clutter or that I don't really need. I have loosened up with every M we have crossed in the portfolio.
Projected retirement--2020 at age 48 (done!)
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Old 05-05-2020, 10:08 AM   #156
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Originally Posted by Amethyst View Post
We are not frugal when it's something we really want. Many would consider us spendthrifts in certain areas. Yet, frugality in other areas has allowed us to indulge the occasional spendthrifty urge.
Same for DW and myself - I call it 'bipolar frugal'.

No new cars for me and only one for DW - Slightly used cars purchased and I do all the wrenching except tires. Became a hobby. Used Mercedes - the parts are normally priced and the mechanic takes payment in beer.

Don't eat out often (not at all nowadays).

Vacations were usually combined with family trips and experiences.

Have done a LOT of upgrades DIY for our two homes.

Retirement planning DIY probably saved us more than I'll ever know.

OTOH - Built a custom house on the barrier island and no regrets.

Sent the kids to parochial schools till 9th grade.

Annual Disney passes.

Two boats to explore east coast of Florida.

Began to upgrade airline seats and rental cars / hotels about 5 years ago. (Not that there is much of a need for that nowadays)

And I bought a Rolex 3 years ago. Just because I wanted to.
DW and I are 59/59. FIRE'd August 2019. Non-cola pension available but will remain untouched until mid sixties to grow, max SS for DH at FRA or 70. Mega retiree health available. IRA rollover from 401k Jan 2020 for NUA treatment. LTCG next few years. AA 40% stocks, 7% cash and 53% Intermediate Treasury fund. Rising equity glidepath.
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Old 05-05-2020, 10:38 AM   #157
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I grew up in what is now a "wealthy burb", we didn't have a lot of money, but had a roof over our heads, food in our belly and clothes on our backs. Ate a lot of beans, Mom made all of the girls clothes and some of the boys.
Both parents instilled a savings mantra in all of us. Dad was out of work a few times, but always had an emergency fund to pull us through. He landed his dream job when I was in high school and it was all uphill for them then. But they still lived frugally, Mom used coupons, shopped the specials and only bought things on sale. They were always generous with their time and money.
I learned quite a bit from them, and saved early/often.
I still shop sales and use coupons!
Give a Man a fish, he will eat for a day.
Teach a Man to fish, he will eat for a lifetime.
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Old 05-05-2020, 10:49 AM   #158
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Frugality is my nature.
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Old 05-05-2020, 11:03 AM   #159
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Originally Posted by Markola View Post
Were you born that way? Did you teach yourself? Did you do it to overcome mistakes or to achieve a goal? Who were your frugal role models?
To achieve a goal. Parents taught me 'deferred gratification'. Also taught me that w*rking hard and making as much money as you could, legally, were a must. But I feared and loathed and hated w*rk and the responsibility required to earn lots of money. I did it anyway, and found pride and self-respect in the hard w*rk and earning. But the fear and loathing remained (80 % percent of the time I hated w*rk, 20% of the time it was actually fun). So my answer to your question is I became frugal in order to save enough money to respectably buy my way out of w*rking for a living, (not going on welfare or mooching off a relative) and all the huge negatives that go with w*rking. I still feel some guilt for being non-productive member of society, but I can live with it, I guess, lol.
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Old 05-05-2020, 11:07 AM   #160
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I don't consider myself frugal, but I am definitely cheap. I have no issue spending on things I know we'll appreciate and use daily, quality pieces or experiences we'll remember, though I do have a hard time with high end travel. I will always shop around for the best price I can find or look for an item used first. And I really dislike spending any money on things I don't love. Our house is almost entirely furnished with used furniture because I want good quality stuff, but both DH and I are too cheap to buy it new.

That said, I was raised on a farm with a DIY attitude. I have a very hard time paying people to do something I can do myself. And I've hired enough people to do work that I know how much you pay someone doesn't necessarily correlate to the job they do.

I would consider DH frugal, though he will spend much more money on travel and house than I would. And he will pay people to do things he doesn't want to do. He just doesn't buy much. We were in our late 30s/early 40s when we met and I don't think he had ever bought a towel, plate or anything household related. Pretty much his entire house was purchased by his mom as gifts over the years, with the exception of a few pieces of furniture.

We both spend on good food, but it's harder and harder to spend big $ at restaurants when we can make food we think is better at home.

ETA that I always found it easier to save by making more money than being extremely frugal.
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