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Old 04-09-2008, 09:03 AM   #21
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it seems to be time to move on.

Anyone had to deal with a similar situation? Any other ideas?
Of Course. And way too often.

To One and all of my Good E-mail buds: As the holidays approach, my heartfelt appreciation goes out to all of you who have taken the time and trouble to send me forwards" over the past 12 months. Thank you for making me feel safe, secure, blessed, and wealthy.

Extra thanks to whoever sent me the one about rat crap in the glue on envelopes 'cause I now have to go get a wet towel every time I need to seal an envelope.

Also, I scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason.

Because of your concern I no longer drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet stains.
I no longer drink Pepsi or Dr Pepper since the people who make these products are atheists who refuse to put "Under God" on their cans.

I no longer use Saran wrap in the microwave because it causes cancer.

I no longer check the coin return on pay phones because I could be pricked with a needle infected with AIDS.

I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day.

I no longer go to shopping malls because someone might drug me with a perfume sample and rob me.

I no longer receive packages from nor send packages by UPS or Fed Ex since they are actually Al Qaeda in disguise.


I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a number for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Jamaica, Uganda, Singapore, and Uzbekistan.

I no longer eat KFC because their "chickens" are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers.


I no longer have any sneakers -- but that will change once I receive my free replacement pair from Nike. I no longer have to buy expensive cookies from Neiman Marcus since I now have their recipe.

I no longer worry about my soul because at last count I have 363,214 angels looking out for me.
Thanks to you, I have learned that God only answers my prayers if I forward an e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes.

I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl who is about to die in the hospital (for the 1,387,258th time)

I no longer have any money at all - but that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their special email tracking program.

Yes, I want to thank you so much for looking out for me that I will now return the favor! If you don't send this e-mail to at least 144,000 people in the next 7 minutes, a large pigeon with a wicked case of diarrhea will land on your head at 5:00 PM (CDT) this afternoon. I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of my next-door neighbor's ex-mother-in-law's second husband's cousin's beautician....
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Old 04-09-2008, 09:06 AM   #22
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I had a guy who was pitching us this investment data service at work a couple years ago. He wouldn't stop sending us new proposals, calling, etc even after we asked several times.

Eventually I got fed up and sent a message to the Jehovah Witnesses with his name, address, and direct number asking for more information. That pretty much put an end to it for us.
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Old 04-09-2008, 09:13 AM   #23
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Any other ideas?
This sometimes works. (Not often enough, however.)

I receive about 1,200 e-mails a week (very few of which are unwanted -- SPAM). That is well over a hundred each day (however, the weekends are pretty sparse). As a consequence, one of the things I, regretfully, must forego is most “chitchat.” It is not that I don’t enjoy it, it is that, with the number of people I communicate with, I never get one copy of a joke but am sent hundreds of duplicates-- In any event, the above mentioned 1,200 is just about my limit. Therefore, the chances of me actually reading that variety of e-mail are very remote and replying to them is completely out of the question.

Now, having said that. I welcome the opportunity to exchange e-mails with you on a wide variety of subjects. You will find me a most chatty person (perhaps even a pest). I am, nevertheless, very focused most times but I do enjoy life and have lots of fun with it.
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Old 04-09-2008, 09:59 AM   #24
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Originally Posted by saluki9 View Post
I had a guy who was pitching us this investment data service at work a couple years ago. He wouldn't stop sending us new proposals, calling, etc even after we asked several times.

Eventually I got fed up and sent a message to the Jehovah Witnesses with his name, address, and direct number asking for more information. That pretty much put an end to it for us.
Not JW - but another missionary group - last quarter in college, my room mate Dan called them up and give them a load of bunkum(they had a radio program).

Where ever I went -for the next ten yrs or so - Reverend Mick got mail!

I had forgotten - thanks Dan.

heh heh heh - he is retired in Northern Cal.
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Old 04-09-2008, 10:32 AM   #25
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An old co-worker would break into "dumb blonde" jokes every time I came within earshot. Since my hair is brown I was too dumb to realize she was baiting me. After we both went off to different locations, the blonde jokes came in by e-mail. One day she called me, said she lost my e-mail address, would I give it to her again. Sure, I would send her an e-mail so she would have it; but the dumb blonde in me forgot.

I wanted to end two relationships at the end of '06. Until April '07 I watched their forwarded e-mails and multiple recipient e-mails about their kids and grands. Both of them never accepted my invitations so I stopped accepting their's; others told me they never accepted their invitations either. Neither one ever wrote anything along the lines of: what's new, how's it going, so I had nothing to respond to. I went straight to blocking their e-mails because I enjoy weeding thru the spam--some good stuff shows up there and I didn't want to see their e-mail addresses again. The day after X-mas one of them sent me an e-mail from another address and new computer, said she had donated some money in my name. I thanked her instantly but didn't give any news about myself or mutual acquaintances. I take the donation as acknowledgement that the relationship is over. I'd rather be "dead to her" than continue the nonsense.
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Old 04-09-2008, 04:25 PM   #26
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I guess we now know what HE does all day while retired :-) Wanna add that to the FAQ/Archives...or to the list of what not to do.
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Old 04-09-2008, 04:56 PM   #27
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...Eventually I got fed up and sent a message to the Jehovah Witnesses with his name, address, and direct number asking for more information. That pretty much put an end to it for us.
That brings back memories ... My Dear Departed Mother did that to a person who was prosthelizing her. She felt they deserved each other.
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Old 04-09-2008, 05:22 PM   #28
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Years ago we had a boss that was a total @$$hole, so we all decided to start having some fun at his expense with him. We started filling out the magazine subscription cards where you'd get a few 'free' issues before you had to decide whether or not you wanted to pay for a full subscription. We also filled out cards for all the businesses harvesting names to become potential clients 'sweepstakes' that we could find around town, and we were sure to check the "Please Contact Me" boxes on them.

His mailman sure must have ended up getting a real workout stuffing his mailbox! And they were probably about ready to rip the phone out of the wall too.

The same could be done in response to all the unwanted spam ex-coworkers send. If they won't quit sending email......give 'em some snail mail to keep 'em busy. Take a walk through a local home improvement show, bridal show, or whatever, and fill out a card (for your ex-coworker) at each booth to win their 'door prize'.......and be sure to remember to give them a phone number.....so they can be contacted and given a sales pitch for new siding if they 'win'.
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Old 04-09-2008, 08:04 PM   #29
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Well, here's what I went with:
Quote:
It may be a coincidence, but since you've retired you seem to be sending more e-mail. As I think about the last few weeks of what you've been broadcasting, I'd like to ask you to remove my address from your group list.
I enjoy sharing about us and our families. I don't particularly enjoy reading about political issues, religious conspiracy videos, the umpteenth aging joke, or pictures of rat tumors. I'm not questioning their relevance and I agree with some of your opinions, but I don't care to be confronted by these topics.
I hope we can keep exchanging personal e-mails. Thanks,
He said that he was just trying to start a conversation but that he'd do as I asked.

He's taking the family on a China tour next week (his spouse is of Chinese ancestry) and should have a great trip report...

I'm cautiously optimistic.
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Old 04-10-2008, 12:28 AM   #30
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i have a cousin who emails similarly. so i set up a separate email account for family and gave that email address to that person as well as to some other family members who are in email-contact with that person. i only check that email every so often as the family i am in good contact with has my normal email address and they are aware of the situation.

this way, my madly ccing email cousin is not insulted and my regular email box is not stuffed with spam. i quickly delete all my cousins stuff which i see is cc'd to everyone in her address book. i open the ones that are directed only to my email address and not cc'd to everyone else. recently, her husband died so of course she cc'd everyone. luckily, she put that in the subject, so i was able to respond without deleting.

her own daughter, the idiot cousin no longer in my association, actually told her mother to remove her from her incessant email list. but for me, it is more important to try & protect someone elses feelings than to fret about a little spam.
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Old 04-10-2008, 07:34 PM   #31
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Nords - Hotmail has a "label as junk" feature - much like what Want2 is talking about. That basically makes his address a junk emailer, and they all go to junk mail. If it's important, he will call you.
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Old 04-11-2008, 02:35 AM   #32
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You could always give his name, email, and phone number to every recruiter of every branch in as many cities as you fee like until you get bored. Tell 'em he's 18 and eager to see the world. Not that I've ever done that to an annoying shipmate, of course...deplorable course of action, I wouldn't recommend it to anyone.
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Old 04-14-2008, 02:03 PM   #33
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Nords - sounds like you took the best, classiest approach. Nice going. Being up front/direct is the best answer.
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Old 04-18-2008, 12:46 AM   #34
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A bit late for you Nords, but I just tell them that I'm cheaping out and switching to dial-up and that it takes forever to download anything that isn't text only. A little white lie, but no hurt feelers.
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Old 04-19-2008, 06:25 AM   #35
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A golf buddy started emailing me endless jokes and political topics. A few here and there would be ok but 8-10 a day is a little much. It won't matter how nice I ask him to stop, he will be pissed. Oh well, probably a moot point as I started playing with another group anyway. This guy likes to play at 8:00am which is too FRIGGING early! Good to get that off my chest.
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