ER WITH KIDS??

[John Galt]

I have no idea how my attitude toward work
influenced my kids. I can't see any workaholic tendencies nor any corporate ladder climbing in any of them.
The oldest got his degree at age 38 and works for
the USDA (outdoorsy type). The second is a stay
at home mom raising my 4 grandchildren.
The youngest is about done with college and I have no idea where she might end up. She does need to get over having everything handed to her on a platter.
The building up of that attitude was my fault.

JG

 

[Jarhead*]

Re: It's not as hard as it's made to look.

I

Consider another aspect of raising kids-- Jarhead's teenage daughter was totally oblivious to the good example her father was trying to set for her because she had enough challenges just getting through the teen years.  Our kids may appreciate what we've done when they're in their 20s, but I don't expect mine to notice before then.  And I won't expect any thank-yous until she's coping with kids of her own!

Nords: Exactly. But don't neccessarily expect thank yous at any age
Proving once again we get too soon old, and too late smart.
In my opinion, I think most parents have an over-inflated attitude about how much effect they have on their kids, regarding home school, public school, etc.
My wife was reading me an article the other day that said most childrens basic character was set at less than 5 years old. In retrospect, it makes sense.
It may make you as a parent feel like you've given your child every possible advantage, and in the process feel good about yourself, but when society gets hold of them
it's a crap=shoot.
As I mentioned before, my dad was a Logger, with a large family to take care of, and I was the oldest in the family. When I left to join the Marine Corps. at 17, the only advice I remember getting from him (Other than don't let the door hit you in the -ss on the way out, was never ever play cards with a guy named after a city.
My brothers and sisters all held him in the highest esteem until he died. He took care of his family, never abused my mother, or us.
We all did o.k. in life, and the jury is still out on the current "all about the kids" attitude. (My wife and I certainly fell into that category).
You puts up your money, and takes your chances.
Regards, Jarhead

 

[wabmester]

Re: It's not as hard as it's made to look.

My wife was reading me an article the other day that said most childrens basic character was set at less than 5 years old.

I think character is established before then.   My guess would be that genes account for about 80%, environment before the age of 3 about 15%, and the rest accounts for about 5% of character.

My 21-month old daughter is cute, smart, funny, curious, goal-driven, and she can dance.   I figure my work is done  

 

[Jarhead*]

Re: It's not as hard as it's made to look.

My 21-month old daughter is cute, smart, funny, curious, goal-driven, and she can dance.   I figure my work is done  

Wab: Doesn't surprise me, in fact except for the dance part from I've been able to tell from your posts, that's the way I picture you. Computer guy and dance seems like a stretch.
A couple of years ago, saw a special, kind of a day in the life of Bill Gates.
They televised a segment showing him and his computer buddies playing golf. (Not a pretty sight)
The last part of the program showed all of them at a dance. Sammy Davis would turn over in his grave
Your wife probably has a great sense of rythem
Regards, Jarhead

 

[Hyperborea]

Re: It's not as hard as it's made to look.

Wab: Doesn't surprise me, in fact except for the dance part from I've been able to tell from your posts, that's the way I picture you. Computer guy and dance seems like a stretch.

Come on computer guys can dance! Just look at Microsoft CEO Steve Balmer go at it. Perhaps Wab dances like him?

http://www.tarmo.fi/arc/monkeydance.mpeg

and

http://www.tarmo.fi/arc/developers.mpeg

 

[RE2Boys]

Bong2 wrote:

One of the things that I would be concerned about is the development of my children's attitude towards work. I have known a few dads in my day that were 'bums,' and I don't think that it was healthy for their kids. I don't want my kids to have the expectation that work is something only other people do, or that they will be able to get away with working for only ten or fifteen years in their life.


RE: my previous post. Yes I've had that concern in the past regarding my kids attitudes toward work and that most Dad's go to an office. My are still quite young (8 and 6) but I tell them that while I'm fortunate to be able to stay home while most Dad's go to an office, I tell then that just about anything I do that is not directly related to the household and their activities is Dad's work. That includes telling them that I need to go to work even though I'm going to contunuing ed classes, or working on the books of a non-profit at home is still work (but really it is for no pay and a few privileges). For the kids, I use a very broad definition of work.

Of course, for me, I work seasonally doing tax returns, so come December through April, I even get paid!!

RE2Boys