Get out of Frugal Mode

[VungTau]

So I made it! I saved like crazy for years, I invested everything I could then I fired at 53. It was a combo of retrenchment, being at 98% of my goal and a readiness to leave China where I spent many years working to build my net worth. Now I am happily retired and living with my GF in SE Asia.

Here's my question: How do you break out of frugal mode (or tweak at least it) now that the race is won?

I am living way below what Firecalc and Futurepath say I can spend but I still have that mentality to save. I like seeing my NW increase each month and the positive cash flow from my investing. I am not really foregoing anything significant but maybe not living quite as comfortably as I easily could be.

Any ideas out there? It must be a common phenomena...

 

[Col. Klink]

My DW and I never have broken out of frugal mode. After LBYM all our life, it is not something that has changed for us in recent years. We still get a kick out of using coupons and other strategies to save money on groceries, gas, etc. When we do go out to eat, we select a restaurant that generally has on the menu stuff we would not make at home. When we travel, we stay at nice hotels. They can "leave the light on" for us, but we won't be there.

 

[DrRoy]

My first year we could spend what we did before RE at 1.6% WR. This year I raised it to 2.5%, just because I could. We'll find something to do with it.

 

[rmcelwee]

I'm 3 years away from FIRE but have already started adjusting. It sounds stupid but three weeks ago I bought a new network switch/hub on Amazon for $10. That doesn't sound like much but a year ago I would not have done it. That one "crazy" purchase made me realize that it did not hurt to buy a few things that you maybe need and I have started buying more impulse type stuff (everything is considered impulse when you normally buy next to nothing) every few days. Buying all that junk on Amazon has definitely loosened me up a bit. I've come to realize that reducing my net worth by $5,000 a year (no way in hell I could really buy that much junk but was just using it as one potential number) will not change my life in any way. I recently turned down a promotion which would equate to maybe $30k in extra net worth in the next three years. It was easy to do when I realized that again, that money would not change my life (but the stress would). So, for now I am just going to buy whatever the hell I want. I don't see a new BMW replacing my Geo Metro at this time but at least part of the reason is I just don't want it to get banged up in the parking lot at work every day. The nice car will come after retirement.

 

[Ronstar]

Immediately after retirement, you may be frugal because you feel that you don’t have enough $ to last the rest of your life. As you go through retirement, you’ll begin to see that you will have enough $ and that it’s ok to loosen the pursestrings a little.

But to jumpstart the process - Get some hobbies. It’s easy to get out of the frugal mode when buying hobby stuff. Then gradually spread your non-frugal spending to other things.

 

[street]

For us I don't believe it will ever change. We do buy what we want when we want but frugal is always on our mind. LOL

Just yesterday my wife took out a new CD because it was the highest rate. She has a plan with that new account. LOL There again we really didn't need to do that but she also is looking for the deal. LOL

I beleive we will never break the good habit that got us to where we are at today.

 

[njhowie]

Here's my question: How do you break out of frugal mode (or tweak at least it) now that the race is won?

Don't be in such a hurry. I would say at least for the first year or two stay in frugal mode until you see how your budget/portfolio holds up. If all is going to plan, then ease out of it - but only if you really want/need to. Just because some model says you could do it doesn't mean you have to or should. Do you have any unmet wants/needs? If not, then forget about it for a while.

 

[Music Lover]

Remain frugal but apply it at a different level:

- when buying groceries look for deals on higher quality items and better cuts of meat
- instead of a low end economy car, find a good deal on a gently used more luxurious or sporty model
- if you like travel, find deals on more expensive destinations

 

[Dtail]

Remain frugal but apply it at a different level:

- when buying groceries look for deals on higher quality items and better cuts of meat
- instead of a low end economy car, find a good deal on a gently used more luxurious or sporty model
- if you like travel, find deals on more expensive destinations

Good advice.

 

[freedomatlast]

I am living way below what Firecalc and Futurepath say I can spend but I still have that mentality to save.

Thanks for mentioning Futurepath. I had never heard of it before, but logged on and ran my numbers. Results are just slightly less optimistic than FireCalc.

Anyway, although still working (stuck in OMY syndrome) , I'm slowly working up to spending more by buying higher quality items, and jobbing out some home and car repairs I used to do myself, but no longer feel like doing anymore. Baby steps........

 

[audreyh1]

It takes time. Focus on your priorities and the spending will follow, up to what you can afford. Realizing that your time and health is limited/future unknown will help you not wait for or put off what is really important to you.

 

[imoldernu]

We've been happily, frugally, retired for 30 years. Don't feel as if we missed anything.
We "could" buy that new Mercedes, but for what? To travel our 2000 miles a year in more class than our '98 Town Car?

I don't know anyone who enjoys life more than jeanie and me. It helps that we just like people.

 

[SecondCor521]

It's not directly related, but for me I find the most value or bang for my buck when I spend on something that makes a problem or annoyance go away. I live in a relatively cold climate and didn't have a really warm winter coat. I was making do with a jacket, but was a little chilly sometimes. So a few days ago I ordered myself a nice warm coat from Amazon for about $60.

Maybe it's charity or spending on your GF or something else for you, but I think maybe finding that thing that you truly feel like it's worthwhile spending and try upping that some more.

 

[audreyh1]

Totally agree.

Part of our spending is to raise our comfort level and make some unavoidable things less of a pain.

It’s about quality of life. The remaining life while we are healthy and can enjoy it the most.

Just because you spend more does want mean you don’t shop for value. We still focus on getting value for our money, look for deals, etc.

It’s just that the bar has been raised......

 

[JDARNELL]

Its a hard habit to break. Its what helped get you hear. Make small changes on the margin. Still search for value and things that improve your quality of life and health. You have the resources now so you want to stay around long enough to spend it all. In an effort to get out of the weeds this year I created a JDARNELL control document with 10 things on it I wanted to do. One of the items was to take X% out of funds and enjoy no matter what.

 

[W2R]

It's nice to feel content with what we have. This is what we all worked for, for so many years.

Saving that excess money for old age could possibly be a good idea. Sometimes one's care and medical expenses at a very old age can be frightfully expensive.

 

[VungTau]

Yes, FuturePath had the same result for me, just a touch less optimistic but still giving me total confidence.

 

[davebarnes]

1. Get married.
2. Acquire some children. Biological or adopted.
3. Buy a boat. After all, you live near the ocean in Vũng Tàu.
4. After doing #1, get a mistress.

5. Make some lists:
a. what you like to do
b. what you would do to make your living unit perfect
c. what you would like to learn

6. Move a bunch of money from your investment account to your "checking" account. It makes it easier to spend it.

 

[walkinwood]

To the OP - this is a common problem. Habits - good & bad - are hard to change.


Think about a small thing or two, that would increase your satisfaction (happiness or whatever term you use) with an increase in spending. Do that - see how you feel. Rinse & repeat till you feel like you're not spending too little.


One example from our experience. We travel economy, but a few years ago decided to up it to economy-plus on long (transatlantic) flights. It made a big difference especially for overnight flights. So now we do it regularly. Since we travel only a few times a year, this doesn't destroy the budget.

 

[GrayHare]

If I can save time by spending a little extra, I now do that. It's one of the few ways one can exchange money for time.

I imagine the difficulty we have kicking the frugal habit is similar to the difficulty others have kicking their overspending habit.

 

[HarveyS]

Just say YES

I look for ways to do things now that work/vacation time is not an excuse. DW and I are flying to south FL for a reunion with my HS buddies. Only 2 nights there due to other commitments, but going anyway. Who knows the next time we all get together?

Also agree with hiring out jobs that you used to do. Time > money at this point. Oh, and I have never been hurt writing a check. Cutting down bushes, trimming trees, painting ceilings, etc....., have all left their mark or "cost" several days recovery.

 

[RobbieB]

I suggest you go out and eat a $50 lunch -

 

[Mr. Tightwad]

Accept the fact that you can't take it with you (unless you're that crypto guy with 180 million locked up in a bitcoin wallet that nobody can access. He did take it with him).

But for the rest of us, spend it, or your heirs will spend it for you.

 

[davebarnes]

I suggest you go out and eat a $50 lunch

Can you even spend 1.2M VND on lunch in Vũng Tàu?

 

[Cobra9777]

I agree with the general sentiment of raising the bar but still seeking good value. We spend freely on discretionary items that make us happy. But I would still describe the manner in which we spend as "frugal" because we always seek out the best value, or at least a reasonable balance between cost vs comfort, time vs money, etc. I'd rather do my research and spend money wisely... and then have the resources to do more fun stuff.

I consider FIRECalc's 95% number to be our "means." First 5 years of ER, we spent about 75-80% of that figure. Definitely still LBYM. I was very concerned about SORR and just generally unsure how things would work out when the big paycheck stopped. Last year, we upped our spend to 90% and I'm gaining confidence to stay at that level or possibly move a bit higher. But that helps frame the spending discussion for us.

DW and I have no shortage of things we'd like to spend discretionary money on. We could both use new cars. Lots of home improvement projects on the backlog. Hobby spending... I'm a woodworker always looking to upgrade some machines. Lots of places still on our travel bucket list.

We try to prioritize, spread it out, and then find the best value. We generally agree on prioritization but we have to be flexible as well. For example, this year, we decided to go ahead and pull the trigger on a long-overdue plumbing repair, which will be ~$7K. So either we push out some other planned discretionary item or we decide to take spending higher. Most likely, we'll do the former and keep spending just under the FIRECalc 95% "means."