Home Maintenance and Aging - What happens when I can't be the Handyman?

[rk911]

That had always been my concern too as to my DW. I was the financial person, she was the gardener. I worried about leaving her to manage the financial affairs alone, and planned and worked (no mortgage, etc.) to make sure she really would have no financial worries, and so only thing for her to do was pay the monthly utility bills, and the annual insurance premiums, and buy the groceries.

As it turned out, she went first and tricked me. Now I am faced with her love, and my shortcoming, the gardening!

i'm sorry for your loss. my wife is everything to me and if she were to go first, well, i don't know how i would cope.

as to making things easier for her...we have zero debt, wills & PoA's in place, successor trustees nominated and upon the second death the trust takes over for liquidation of assets. this year i have two financial goals. she cant't get LT Care insurance so we're going to designate $X in the portfolio for her care and rebalance those funds in a more conservative manner. and i want to simplify and consolidate our IRA's to make it easier for her to manage. RMD's will be on auto pilot. most of our monthly bills are on auto-pay but i want to re-start paper billing as she does not like using the computer. currently teaching her how to reconcile CC and bank accounts. OTOH, i'd likely kill off all of the plants, grass and trees.

 

[RetireeRobert]

i'm sorry for your loss. my wife is everything to me and if she were to go first, well, i don't know how i would cope.

as to making things easier for her...we have zero debt, wills & PoA's in place, successor trustees nominated and upon the second death the trust takes over for liquidation of assets. this year i have two financial goals. she cant't get LT Care insurance so we're going to designate $X in the portfolio for her care and rebalance those funds in a more conservative manner. and i want to simplify and consolidate our IRA's to make it easier for her to manage. RMD's will be on auto pilot. most of our monthly bills are on auto-pay but i want to re-start paper billing as she does not like using the computer. currently teaching her how to reconcile CC and bank accounts. OTOH, i'd likely kill off all of the plants, grass and trees.

Sounds like you have a good plan in place--except for the plants/grass/trees!

And thanks for your condolences.

 

[rk911]

For the longest time I was a DIY'er. Slowly and steadily I've hired out for more of the maintenance needs of my house. The latest example, which began a year ago or so: I pay a premium to have my salt delivered and loaded into my water softener. Those 40 pound bags are just too cumbersome, and it's worth every penny to me.
"worth every penny to me" is my mantra for most of the things I pay for, as a small price for me to continue to enjoy my home of 35+ years. Yet another example of YMMV. Incidentally, we just had a major snow storm here in NJ, and it took me 3 rounds of snow-blowing to clear it all. That remains one of the things I still do myself, but only because I for-some-strange-reason enjoy it, other than major snow storms like this one. But I'm mentally ready to pay for snow removal service as well, whenever I can't do it anymore.
I prefer this to moving.

we hired out our snow removal a few years ago in preparation for our first snowbird trip. we canceled that trip this year but decided to keep the shovelers (they clear the snow by hand). i was taking out the trash when they came by (for the seond time) on Sunday evening to clear the drive, deck and sidewalks of the 6" of partly cloudy that fell over the weekend. i felt, and feel, very good about the decision to keep them. i gave them hot chocolate and went back inside where it was warm!

 

[W2R]

[...]I think I'd be very frustrated by having to hire out most repair work, rather than the small fraction that I can't do[...]
Am I overreacting? How have others managed this transition from DIY to depending on others?

I'm 72, aging fast, and never was capable of doing much home maintenance and repair. Being a female academic type, to be honest nobody has ever expected that of me.

So for me, it has been pretty easy to just pick up the phone and call my handyman, Will, when I need to have something done. I would imagine that it's harder for some guys to accept that they need help and make that call, but not for me.

The big "plus" to hiring Will to do these things, is that he actually does quite expert work and knows what he is doing.

Even though Will is considered to be a relatively expensive handyman, he is worth every cent and it doesn't come to more than a few hundred a year, if that. Some years I don't need him at all.

Look at it this way - - you're providing a little work for someone you feel is competent, trustworthy, and reliable. Jobs are hard to find these days so you are doing a good deed by hiring a handyman.

 

[Jerry1]

I plan on hiring out whatever I can't, or don't want, to do so that I can stay in this house as long as possible. It's a nice brick ranch on a slab (no stairs) sitting on an acre. I suspect that the yard work will be first to go. I enjoy it, but certain heavy lift things will go soon. As for maintenance in the house, anything beyond the easy stuff will go quickly. I can handle light switches and such maybe even a little plumbing like changing out a Delta faucet cartridge . . . but much beyond that and I'm hiring it out. I might do one more painting of a room here or there, but probably not ceilings. I look at it as much cheaper than moving and much more palatable (to me) to not have to share a wall, floor or ceiling with anyone else. Of course things happen, but that's the plan at my current age of 60. I think I have a good 10 years before I give up the basic jobs like mowing the lawn and handling snow.

 

[Leo1277]

I used to do many of these things myself earlier and even enjoyed it a lot; I did the mowing, the tree planting and trimming, and most interior things including finishing everything in a 2000 square foot sun room and walk out basement, including electric, extensive tile work, a cedar sauna, and a large bar and game room which has a lot of stained oak paneling on the walls. But looking back, to some extent it was a matter of proving to myself that I can do it, and now I have other interests that I want to use my time for.

So my view has evolved, and now for me the answer has two parts. Currently they are a matter of choice, but they would similarly apply to the time down the road when I just couldn't do these things anymore.

First, have a really good handyman. After literally years of trying, I have succeeded at both the place up north and the one in Florida, one of them has been with me for twelve years, and the other for three years. The quality of the handyman matters a lot, I have tried many others before, but after a while you get a sense of their quality and you know a good handyman when you see him. One of them charges about $20/hour, but he is so reliable I don't even measure his time or get an estimate ahead of time, he just bills after the fact and is very fair. The other charges $30/hour, which is a bit on the higher end, but he is super efficient, very conscientious, and also very fair. I make sure to show them that I appreciate their work, by giving them little extras, donate some of my tools I don't need anymore, give them a pie when I bake, and give presents for kids birthdays and Christmas etc. Just being a nice human being, good folks will recognize it and return the favor in form of quality work, and those that don't recognize it are usually not worth keeping.

Second, strategically hire out most of the recurring services. The first was snow plowing up north. I have had the same guy for more than 25 years, and since that time he hasn't raised his price once. He still does my 600 foot long driveway including a circle in front of the house for $20, and often in the middle of the night if a storm is coming through. No way I would do that myself. Next came mowing. I used to do that with a lawn tractor, but it took me more than three hours including trimming, and there is just so much maintenance on a lawn tractor and even the gas just adds up. Now I have a company that does it for $100 a pop. Sure it's serious money, but I just don't want to work for such a long time and then risk getting teased by the daughters for having a "farmer's tan" yet again

Down south all the landscaping, trimming, irrigation is taken care of by the HOA, and (if you speak enough Spanish) you can even get them to do it the way you like. So that place is also lock up ready and I can leave at any time I please. But I still use the handyman for the interior things: the place has very high ceilings and I just don't feel like monkeying around on a tall ladder, and I think I have done my life's share of interior painting and all the other similar stuff as well.

 

[Music Lover]

Eventually I'll have to hire out some jobs when I can't or get too lazy to do them myself. But I done so much in the last couple years that every major thing is brand new and should be fine for 20 - 30 years.

- new shingles on house and garage
- gut and reno main bathroom plus built 2 additional bathrooms (ensuite + half bath)
- new flooring
- new paint in every room
- replaced two older leaky windows now every window is triple pane
- added a 3rd deck with a screened gazebo
- built a 65' raised planter bed around a firepit

We have a week or so of work left to do outside then it's all done, and hopefully we can relax and enjoy if for many years to come.

 

[Tree-dweller]

most of our monthly bills are on auto-pay but i want to re-start paper billing as she does not like using the computer. currently teaching her how to reconcile CC and bank accounts. OTOH, i'd likely kill off all of the plants, grass and trees.

This^ is a concern for me too. DW has said repeatedly, usually when I try to show her how it all works with automation, that she’d rely on paper when I’m taking a dirt nap.
On the original subject, I’ll be happy to pay someone to do the riskier stuff involving ladders and such, as well as the the tasks involving contortions, like most plumbing. I gotta admit though that there’ve been several times lately when I’ve wished I had a true workshop instead of the one-car garage I use for projects (after moving the car), so the itch is still there.

 

[jollystomper]

One area that I have already stopped DIY: anything that requires getting on a ladder. No more using a ladder to clean gutters or to get on a roof, my body cannot take falls like they used to. Too many friends started getting badly hurt with long recoveries in their 50s from ladder falls.

 

[RobbieB]

Not afraid of ladders to get on roof. Buy good (expensive) ladders rated way over my weight.

Extension ladder is braced on the bottom by concrete pavers and tied to the gutter on top with bungee. Not moving back or side to side.

Hiring out tree work. Not going up unsupported ladders with chain saw in hand -

 

[Sunset]

OP - I had this thought as I was shoveling 10" of snow over the weekend. That at some point I'll be giving up all this handyman stuff due to getting older.

I have a vacation property where I'm installing a septic system, my contractor turned out to be a flake, so looks like I'll be completing it myself. That place is a ton of work, and my thoughts are that we will stop using it in 10 yrs.

For the same reason our next house should be 1 level, age will creep up on us and better to make the move, or figure out our plan first.

 

[RetiredAt55.5]

Not going up unsupported ladders with chain saw in hand -

That's a good rule to live by, at any age!

 

[JoeWras]

Hiring out tree work. Not going up unsupported ladders with chain saw in hand -

RobbieB put a smiley here, and RetiredAt55.5 commented, but I'll pile on.

If you ever find yourself on a ladder doing tree work, stop. Immediately! Something's wrong. No respectable tree person uses ladders.

Most accidents happen with the branch bounce-back knocking you off the ladder. Scan youtube and you'll find 100s, maybe 1000s of "funny" videos of this accident.

In reality, a church friend solved all their retirement issues about what kind of handiwork to do by doing this. He was found on the ground next to the ladder with a saw nearby. He doesn't remember exactly what he was doing. He spent 2 months in the hospital, 6 months in rehab. Going home only lasted a few months and he is now in assisted living. He can only say a few words. A few years later, he finally can feed himself. But he knows the answer to handiwork! Zero.

 

[socca]

One area that I have already stopped DIY: anything that requires getting on a ladder. No more using a ladder to clean gutters or to get on a roof, my body cannot take falls like they used to...

I was surprised to see my neighbor doing something on his roof late last year. He was 90. Some of us just refuse to admit that we're getting a bit long in the tooth ...

 

[CardsFan]

RobbieB put a smiley here, and RetiredAt55.5 commented, but I'll pile on.

If you ever find yourself on a ladder doing tree work, stop. Immediately! Something's wrong. No respectable tree person uses ladders.

Most accidents happen with the branch bounce-back knocking you off the ladder. Scan youtube and you'll find 100s, maybe 1000s of "funny" videos of this accident.

In reality, a church friend solved all their retirement issues about what kind of handiwork to do by doing this. He was found on the ground next to the ladder with a saw nearby. He doesn't remember exactly what he was doing. He spent 2 months in the hospital, 6 months in rehab. Going home only lasted a few months and he is now in assisted living. He can only say a few words. A few years later, he finally can feed himself. But he knows the answer to handiwork! Zero.

+1000.

I had a friend that was found dead on the ground by his BIL at the family farm. Next to his ladder. The saw was still up in the tree. He was in his mid to late 50's.

 

[braumeister]

One word of encouragement for those who may be nervous about aging in place. The last two people who moved away from my street were both in their 90s and doing fairly well. They were both still driving and shopping on their own. We still have several in their 80s who are also doing well. One likes to say the only way they'll get him out of his home is with a toe tag attached.

 

[CindyBlue]

Gee, all this talk about ladders is scary! We just spent last summer fixing all the things around dad's house and the property (about 3 1/2 acres, of which about 2 1/2 is usable) and a lot of that involved ladder work - gutters for two houses (something we actually do regularly because we live under large oak trees - lots of leaves!) and lots of tree work (with ladders and chain saws.) We didn't think a thing of it, and it sounds like we should have!

I've been thinking lately about getting gutter covers for both houses, which will help a lot, and the tree work is pretty much done, and we will hire out anything that involves a high ladder from here on out. All your ladder stories have scared me - into sanity (smile!)

Getting gutter covers (a big expense) depends on the decision we have to make as to whether or not will we stay here. Dad passed away last month, and his house and our house is on the same property, so we have two houses to maintain. We've got the property to maintenance level, thank goodness, and we enjoy the work (including lots of mowing!) So far we are capable of it, but we need to do more thoughtful planning about the future.

The main issue for us is that if we sell, there's really no place anywhere near us that we can afford to buy that is comparable to this place. We love living in the country (about 5 miles from the nearest small town but about 25 miles from the nearest hospital.) Anything in town is way too expensive. We'd realistically have to move to another state, and so far we aren't ready to do that.

Decisions, decisions...sigh...

 

[jldavid47]

I'm 66 and my wife is 63 and we are still doing almost almost all of our yard work and basic inside cleaning and maintenance. My attitude about lawn mowing is that I am going to do it until I can't because it guarantees me that I will get some exercise at least once a week during mowing season (which generally runs from late March to mid November here). I'm still in good enough physical condition to do that but I'm not in denial that some day I won't be. We also still shovel our own snow but that is only 2-3 times a year here. Some day we'll have to farm that out as well. We'll know when the time comes.


As for other home maintenance, I've been hiring out more and more as the years have gone by. 25 years ago I remodeled a half bath by myself including doing the plumbing. Now I wouldn't think of doing that. For many things I used to do myself I now hire a handyman because (a) I can afford it and (b) many things I could do 20 years ago are now difficult or unsafe for me to do today. I just try to be honest with myself about what I can and cannot do as I age.

 

[Lewis Clark]

... I pay a premium to have my salt delivered and loaded into my water softener. Those 40 pound bags are just too cumbersome, and it's worth every penny to me. ...

Water softener salt is now available in 25 pound bags. Much easier to handle. : )

 

[Rushmore]

I've been thinking lately about getting gutter covers for both houses, which will help a lot, and the tree work is pretty much done, and we will hire out anything that involves a high ladder from here on out. All your ladder stories have scared me - into sanity (smile!)

Getting gutter covers (a big expense) depends on the decision we have to make as to whether or not will we stay here. Dad passed away last month, and his house and our house is on the same property, so we have two houses to maintain. We've got the property to maintenance level, thank goodness, and we enjoy the work (including lots of mowing!) So far we are capable of it, but we need to do more thoughtful planning about the future.

Decisions, decisions...sigh...[/QUOTE]
This is the second house I’ve put those foam gutter fillers in(think pool noodle). Easy to put in. Seem to work well. Not too many big trees at this house, but other house had big maples around it. Don’t know how they’d be for pine needles

 

[JoeWras]

I still use ladders, at least for a few more years. I check on my roof twice a year. It requires an extension ladder. I also recently replaced a roof penetration with decking and shingles. Yet, I see a time a few years off when I hire a guy.

Ladder safety requires a long checklist. Among them is a firm stance at the proper angle, and no interference from dynamic objects such as people, pets and falling objects. A tree branch is a falling object and acts unexpectedly. A tree trunk does not provide a firm stance. There are many problems with ladders and trees.

Here's a short 19 second accident. Although the branch unexpectedly hits the man directly, it could have just as easily hit the ground and bounced back to the ladder, causing the ladder to go sideways. This unexpected action of the falling branch is the most common way to kill yourself on a ladder while working with trees. Also note the man "holding the ladder for safety" is a do-nothing. He bails, and probably would have bailed if the branch was hitting the ladder directly. Holding a ladder is a warning sign.

 

[CindyBlue]

This is the second house I’ve put those foam gutter fillers in(think pool noodle). Easy to put in. Seem to work well. Not too many big trees at this house, but other house had big maples around it. Don’t know how they’d be for pine needles[/QUOTE]

I've never heard of these. I can't figure out how "pool noodles" would let the water into the gutter rather than just pouring water over the side of the gutter. Would you mind giving me a name of a product like that so I can look it up?

 

[kcowan]

We have both high end and low end outsources. Painter must clean up though. Everything they do, I used to do so I am a tough customer. Plumbing was the first job I outsourced many years ago.

 

[CindyBlue]

Has anyone used these "Slimguard" gutter covers? They look easy to install...

https://www.cwcsupplyusa.com/slimguard5kstyle.aspx

 

[Music Lover]

I've never heard of these. I can't figure out how "pool noodles" would let the water into the gutter rather than just pouring water over the side of the gutter. Would you mind giving me a name of a product like that so I can look it up?

The foam acts like the foam used in a sponge. A sponge lets water go through, a pool noodle repels water.