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Old 12-21-2019, 05:54 PM   #41
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I believe Tinder is basically a hookup app, too. I've never used it, but that's my impression from what I've heard/seen.
All these "social" apps are what you want them to be. They are just means by which you meet people (or chat if that's what you want); how those meetings look like is up to you and the other person.
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Old 12-21-2019, 08:01 PM   #42
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Any friends who are in public safety or work shift work?

They may be free in the middle of the work day too and looking for someone to
hang out with.

All the best,
LB
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Old 12-21-2019, 08:41 PM   #43
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With websites like this they can be a help with your social life. I have a few sites I visit each day and enjoy shooting the bull with them just like here. For me I think it takes away that lonely time when I have ideal time.

Find some interests and find a website and get involved with it.
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Old 12-22-2019, 04:36 AM   #44
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I did considerable shift work; almost always rotating shifts (working different times of day or night).

Never had the energy to hang out. Always trying to get some sleep.

Quote:
Originally Posted by leftbucket View Post
Any friends who are in public safety or work shift work?

They may be free in the middle of the work day too and looking for someone to
hang out with.

All the best,
LB
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Old 12-22-2019, 05:14 AM   #45
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McDonald's. Dunkin Donuts. Etc. Try different locations.
Some Lions Clubs do socialize during the day. Look in your area for another club.
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Old 12-22-2019, 09:07 AM   #46
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All these "social" apps are what you want them to be. They are just means by which you meet people (or chat if that's what you want); how those meetings look like is up to you and the other person.
Well I guess it's a moot point (the nature of Tinder, that is), since I just noticed the OP is married.
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Old 12-22-2019, 09:16 AM   #47
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Well I guess it's a moot point (the nature of Tinder, that is), since I just noticed the OP is married.
Oh, I didn't realize... Not that I'm an expert in marriages or even LTR but isn't a purpose to be in one not be alone? On the other hand "alone" is not the same as "lonely"...
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Old 12-22-2019, 09:26 AM   #48
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Adding an eating out suggestion. My older DB lives in Ft. Lauderdale. When we visit we go to this popular local breakfast/lunch restaurant. There's usually a huge table (10-15) people eating breakfast. It's there every time we go there. DB said that table is for people who are alone and can sit/eat/chat with others who are alone and often they are regulars. I thought what an awesome idea.
Restaurant just keeps that table set up, sometimes not full but always there.
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Old 12-22-2019, 09:46 AM   #49
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Adding an eating out suggestion. My older DB lives in Ft. Lauderdale. When we visit we go to this popular local breakfast/lunch restaurant. There's usually a huge table (10-15) people eating breakfast. It's there every time we go there. DB said that table is for people who are alone and can sit/eat/chat with others who are alone and often they are regulars. I thought what an awesome idea.
Restaurant just keeps that table set up, sometimes not full but always there.
That is a common thing for small town America cafes. It is a meeting place for all or anyone that wants to partake it solving the worlds problem or just to visit and listen. It is a wonderful thing for retired people and they are there at least a couple times a day for their social life kick.
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Old 12-22-2019, 10:22 AM   #50
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That is a common thing for small town America cafes. It is a meeting place for all or anyone that wants to partake it solving the worlds problem or just to visit and listen. It is a wonderful thing for retired people and they are there at least a couple times a day for their social life kick.
Ft. Lauderdale isn't exactly small town America, but the local neighborhoods are very small town. These neighborhoods are scattered throughout larger cities. Makes me think of ethnic neighborhoods in Chicago. Very tight knit, people look out for each other. They know when one another is traveling or their personal business. My DF moved to Evanston, IL (Chicago suburb) recently. She found a brownstone apartment near the lake (she's alone in her late 70's). The older community is active and welcoming. She found her niche of friends already. Her memory is not so good, but her energy is amazing.
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Old 12-22-2019, 10:41 AM   #51
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I have always been a loner. During my working years, I rarely sought out the company of coworkers. I have very few people I spend time with, and that small circle shrunk last year when my square dancing activity fried up due to the death of our long-time caller. I have had a steady ladyfriend for the last 15 years but we don't live together (we do live near each other).


And that's the way I like it all. The less contact I have with other people, the better.
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Old 12-22-2019, 11:41 AM   #52
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Make friend with nurses, they usually only have a few days every two weeks they are working because their pay structure incentivizes working as many hours in a row as possible (which can't be good for patient care or healthcare costs but...).

I was off for 11 months before getting my current job, I regarded it as a retirement trial run, and thought I was perfectly happy. DW, however, says I was desperate for interaction when she got home from work, which as an introvert is not necessarily what she's up for at that point.
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Old 12-22-2019, 03:02 PM   #53
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If you're active, join a bike club. Most of the daytime weekday riders may be older, but they're healthy and fit enough to be out there, so won't seem older.
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Old 12-23-2019, 07:48 AM   #54
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Oh, I didn't realize... Not that I'm an expert in marriages or even LTR but isn't a purpose to be in one not be alone? On the other hand "alone" is not the same as "lonely"...
Yeah, that's the purpose, I suppose. But marriage is no guarantee against loneliness. For instance, I watched a video on loneliness in women over 60 recently, and the comments section was filled with lonely, married women. I also see many men talking about unhappy marriages. As Robin Williams said, "I used to think that the worst thing in life was to end up alone. It's not. The worst thing in life is ending up with people who make you feel alone."

I'm not saying any of this refers to the OP, of course. I'm just making general comments. I'm guessing the OP is referring to situational feelings of loneliness that come and go, and have nothing to do with his marriage.
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Old 12-23-2019, 09:24 PM   #55
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No.


3 years into ER next month, and DW is still working. I have made an effort to stay in touch with former w*rk friends and do things socially often. During the day, our two dogs are my best buddies, we hike every day after lunch (about 475 mi. so far this year!). That, and I am a busy do-er type of person with lots of hobbies, projects, stuff to do (and a second lake 120 year old home purchased this summer, keeping me extra busy).

But that is just me, we are all different.
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Old 12-23-2019, 09:42 PM   #56
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I don't think the OP cares any more, hasn't been back for a while now. LOL
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Old 12-23-2019, 10:44 PM   #57
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I don't think the OP cares any more, hasn't been back for a while now. LOL
Still care. Still here. Reading with interest. Thanks for the input.
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Old 12-24-2019, 07:38 PM   #58
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Happiest guy I know that retired early (at age 55) has 5 kids, and is now up to 9 or 10 grandkids. And he has 6 siblings which means a million nieces/nephews. He once jokingly told me he wishes he could be lonely LOL.
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Old 12-24-2019, 08:29 PM   #59
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^ everybody wants what they donít have

Itís a human condition lol
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Old 12-24-2019, 09:05 PM   #60
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There seems to be various hobby clubs around in my area, so maybe you can find something of your interest in your area? Meetup.com may be a good place to start exploring.

I second Meetup.com..I currently lead a hiking group on this site (evenings and weekends) but I plan to lead a few morning weekday hikes once I exit the workforce.
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