So, how are you keeping "interested" and finding purpose?

[frequenttraveler]

Purpose in retirement...absolutely necessary for me

OK, I am the new kid here, but want to take a shot at this. I have accumulated a lot of knowledge and (hopefully) some wisdom through the years. One of my major purposes is to pass that along to the next generation--not just my kids, but friends, people in my church, etc. I do volunteer financial counseling at my church for anyone with a need, and am beginning to branch out to others who have a need.

I am not a saint either, as one poster said, but I think we all have SO MUCH to offer that it would be a shame to not help others to NOT make the same mistakes I did!

Just my 2 cents.

Jim

 

[Rich_by_the_Bay]

I'm still in the honeymoon stage of my semi-retirement (month 2). I thought I was going to be a little restless during my non-work time but so far, at least, the opposite is happening: I'm restless at work and thinking about getting home so I can trim the hibiscus, work out, take a nap, whatever.

I can tell it's going to take some time to find the right balance. But back to the OP, "purpose" is one thing, contentment is another. My goal is the latter, and it seems to be inserting itself into my life automatically. Trying to define and pursue "purpose" makes my head spin, so I don't bother. BTDT.

 

[Ed_The_Gypsy]

Hi, vickko,

It seems you live in Ottawa, the capital city and one of the most interesting cities in Canada. I read recently that it is one of the best places to live in Canada. (Want to trade places?)

Why not make a list of the things you are missing? Be very general. Just do a memory dump. Make a big list of everything that comes to mind. Then go back in a day and look at it. Put a number value to each item. Throw out the unimportant ones. Brainstorm how to deal with each one.

I like lists. They simplify things.

 

[Kroeran]

Ottawa is paradise from June 15 to August 15. We have 4 waterways that intersect (Ottawa, Rideau and Gatineau rivers, and the Rideau Canal).

It can be grey and ucky August-October, and half the time we get the first snow in early November that does not melt until April.

With the help of global warming, those patterns are shifting though - we had our first snowfall free March...ever. Maybe there was a quarter inch flurry at the airport one night. But last year we nearly broke a record as far as snow. Then again, warmer temps generate more snow....below a certain point it gets too cold to snow...if you can believe it.

If you are a winter sports person, there is more to do winters than slightly warmer cities, such as Toronto or even Montreal. We have the worlds largest skating rink (several miles) and ski hills close enough for weekday evening skiing. Its a good place to work and be a student, as the weather drives you indoors Sept-April. Bilingualism (french) is an important factor regarding many professions here.

As far as FIRE, Canada and Florida were made for each other for the snowbird cycle, and I will soon be a third generation snowbird. Tradition is to have the clan gathering at Canadian thanksgiving in mid October, and then don't come back until tax time, mid April, just when it is starting to get too hot in Florida.

 

[flyfishnevada]

Walt, sadly I´m one of those guys -that you mention-constantly thinking that I should be doing something useful, practical, "meaningful" wth my extensive free time.....but do nothing of the sort. And I kind of end up feeling remorseful, for wasting my time and not profitting from a situation that many envy. All this compounded by seeing that my retired colleagues do what I think I ought to be doing too..... but don´t. Reading the "what did you do today" thread causes the same depressing feeling to me....
All these things make me think that I am either a dull person or without interests-that I don´t deserve the windfall of my very privileged ERment.

I saw this and had to respond. My wife is like this. She needs to feel productive, needed. She has a very hard time doing anything for herself. In her case, she has some self esteem and confidence issues and maybe you do too. In any case, you gotta come to terms with the idea that doing something for you and you alone is profitable, useful and meaningful. Money is not the only measure of value. Its a habitual way of thinking that you need to break. You need a little dose of how to BE retired. Try picking up a book on the subject. My wife is reading How to Retire Happy, Wild and Free. Enjoying retirement is a skill and like any thing else some people come to it naturally and others don't. You can learn it though. good luck!!

For the meantime, you can stay busy learning how to be retired.

 

[haha]

I have found that one way to stay interested is to tell others how to live on internet forums.

Ha

 

[Kroeran]

A 'purpose' reminds me of a friend who taught physics at a local University. Taught his classes, did his research and published his papers for 44 years. One day, his purpose was revealed to him. He applied for a sabbatical to pursue "the theory of everything". The U turned him down. He is now a 'professor emeritus' seeking the "theory of everything". "Everything" he wants to do.

is it this fellow?

YouTube - Dr Thomas Campbell - My Big TOE (1 of 18)

My Big TOE

 

[Kroeran]

Ottawa is paradise from June 15 to August 15. We have 4 waterways that intersect (Ottawa, Rideau and Gatineau rivers, and the Rideau Canal).

It can be grey and ucky August-October, and half the time we get the first snow in early November that does not melt until April.

With the help of global warming, those patterns are shifting though - we had our first snowfall free March...ever. Maybe there was a quarter inch flurry at the airport one night. But last year we nearly broke a record as far as snow. Then again, warmer temps generate more snow....below a certain point it gets too cold to snow...if you can believe it.

If you are a winter sports person, there is more to do winters than slightly warmer cities, such as Toronto or even Montreal. We have the worlds largest skating rink (several miles) and ski hills close enough for weekday evening skiing. Its a good place to work and be a student, as the weather drives you indoors Sept-April. Bilingualism (french) is an important factor regarding many professions here.

As far as FIRE, Canada and Florida were made for each other for the snowbird cycle, and I will soon be a third generation snowbird. Tradition is to have the clan gathering at Canadian thanksgiving in mid October, and then don't come back until tax time, mid April, just when it is starting to get too hot in Florida.

following up on this, there is as well a smaller tradition of American snowbirds, Americans fleeing the summer to head to northern cottages, which are very inexpensive if you are not within a few hours of a population centre. The economics of this perhaps makes less sense with the dollar near parity.

another factor might be snowbird+, which is setting up the American inverted snowbird pattern but staying a few days longer in the summer, and establishing Canadian tax residency, so that you can qualify for health care (the paperwork may be a bit more complicated than that), in the way a Canadian might do to establish tax residency in Florida for the purpose of having a much lower tax rate.

because my pension plan includes a provision for world health care (excluding hospital emergency which I plan to plug with blue cross - advice?), I am looking at establishing residency in Florida so that I can escape the perils of socialized medicine, as well as escape provincial/state income taxes, and take advantage of homesteader status. Go back north for a few months in the summers. In Ontario, things are iffy now, but they are cutting back on nurses, at a time when they should be expanding to prepare for aging boomers.

If you are looking for a really inexpensive lifestyle, do a reverse snowbird, spend winters at Canadian cottages and summers at a Florida condo - live in the off season, adjust your 7/5 months ratios to establish residency in the country that benefits you the most.

 

[ScottFromUtah]

I try to find a mix of personal development (running, biking, swimming, reading, Spanish study, travel, etc.) and volunteer work (Rotary Club service projects, church work, etc.). I also have a decade-old bucket list that I'm still working on. I feel the "fire" and still have a purpose-driven life, but I don't feel guilty at all for just goofing off (watching the Utah Jazz on TV, spending time on useless forums, etc.)

 

[vicente solano]

I admit that doing nothing useful because I am too lazy to do anything worthwhile, makes me feel like that I am a good-for-nothing kind of guy. And to top it all, I don´t want to change. Sometimes I think that my behaviour won´t go without some sort of punishment. Laziness is my main capital sin. I truly envy those of you that are different than me on this issue.

 

[Kroeran]

I admit that doing nothing useful because I am too lazy to do anything worthwhile, makes me feel like that I am a good-for-nothing kind of guy. And to top it all, I don´t want to change. Sometimes I think that my behaviour won´t go without some sort of punishment. Laziness is my main capital sin. I truly envy those of you that are different than me on this issue.

according to my take on things, once you are financially independent, that is the time to focus on catering to "primal impulses" and "creative hungers", subject to not doing anything self destructive.

life is about pleasure, and work and wealth is about creating a platform to experience pleasure, maximizing your pleasure return over your lifetime.

Hedonism asks the question "how can I maximize my pleasure over the next 5 minutes".

The miser asks "how much can I deprive myself...so that I can leave a bucket of money for my spoiled children to further debase themselves after I am gone".

balance lies in the uninhibited pursuit of intelligent pleasure, and in spoiling children in ways that do not undermine their motivation and independence (ref. Die Broke)

very few "fortune founders" can make the switch from work and miserliness to a more balanced approach. The usual pattern is that the next generation recovers the lost sense of hedonism, however, they are often not taught discipline, and the genetic line returns to mediocrity once the capital is spent.

the exception are those family lines that learn the trick of multigenerational accomplishment, while not losing touch with the "intelligent", or sustainable pleasure principle..."green pleasure"

for those new to financial independence, and not quite comfortable with it, I would suggest a study of old money families....or even the Preppy Handbook, which sort of lays it all out, albeit tongue in cheek.

 

[WB52]

Kroeran,
I can not agree with your assesment of the purpose of life as to pursue pleasure or of human nature being driven by selfish motives. God put each of us here for a purpose (other than selfgratification). I'm sure you have seen great acts of kindness and generosity, right?
In your heart of hearts, you know there is more.

 

[Kroeran]

Kroeran,
I can not agree with your assesment of the purpose of life as to pursue pleasure or of human nature being driven by selfish motives. God put each of us here for a purpose (other than selfgratification). I'm sure you have seen great acts of kindness and generosity, right?
In your heart of hearts, you know there is more.

but if you are doing kindness and generosity for others rather than for yourself, I would say you are not doing it right

and if you are not receiving pleasure from kindness and generosity, for sure you are not going it right

we are on the same page, its just a matter of terminology

my take is that empathetic behavior is an expansion of how you receive pleasure - it still the same selfish motive...but smart selfish

 

[WB52]

With all due respect, I believe there is more to life than persuing our own pleasure. Sure we "feel good" when we do things for others and that is pleasurable. But the pleasure is a side benefit, not the goal. For example, sometimes we do things that feel bad because they are right, according to a higher standard. Not all motives or fulfillment are with respect to our own pleasure.
There are a few things that I would give my life for, because they are bigger than I am. There a a lot of books filled with good people making sacrificial acts for the sake of others, or freedom, or morality (the real kind).
I may have taken a deep dive on philosophy here, but you have to stand for something.

 

[Kroeran]

I admit that doing nothing useful because I am too lazy to do anything worthwhile, makes me feel like that I am a good-for-nothing kind of guy. And to top it all, I don´t want to change. Sometimes I think that my behaviour won´t go without some sort of punishment. Laziness is my main capital sin. I truly envy those of you that are different than me on this issue.

you work, you are paying the rent...whats the problem?

who is to say which life is better than another

yet you hang out here

you say you don't want to change, yet you envy others here

would you like to dig into this a bit?

 

[haha]

If we lived in tribal societies, or even in frontier towns we would understand that family and group survival and propagation into the future is the purpose of life.

That is why humans have generally been quite willing to kill or even better, to annihilate humans that they consider "other".

Today some of us have extended the life mandate to include other groups, other cultures, and other nations. Some of us even go so far as to include non-human species, especially if they are cute or cuddly or justify jobs studying their habitat to be sure that a new building doesn't endanger the poor dears.

My guess is if the messy ever hits the fan. a lot of this will go away fast.

Ha

 

[Koolau]

If we lived in tribal societies, or even in frontier towns we would understand that family and group survival and propagation into the future is the purpose of life.

That is why humans have generally been quite willing to kill or even better, to annihilate humans that they consider "other".

Today some of us have extended the life mandate to include other groups, other cultures, and other nations. Some of us even go so far as to include non-human species, especially if they are cute or cuddly or justify jobs studying their habitat to be sure that a new building doesn't endanger the poor dears.

My guess is if the messy ever hits the fan. a lot of this will go away fast.

Ha

Can you spell Sarajevo?

 

[RonBoyd]

If we lived in tribal societies, or even in frontier towns we would understand that family and group survival and propagation into the future is the purpose of life.

That is why humans have generally been quite willing to kill or even better, to annihilate humans that they consider "other".

Kind of reminds me of the current Stephen Hawking controversy (nothing new as it pops up every so often):

Scientists weigh in on Hawking's alien warning

Blair Csuti, a biologist at Oregon State University, defended Hawking's trepidation, arguing that the principles of evolution would have shaped those beings just as they did life on Earth, selecting for self-preserving behavior. "Aliens visiting newly discovered planets, like Earth, would place their own interests above those of unsophisticated indigenous residents."

(If interested, the complete list of commentaries is found at Journal of Cosmology.)

 

[Kroeran]

If we lived in tribal societies, or even in frontier towns we would understand that family and group survival and propagation into the future is the purpose of life.

That is why humans have generally been quite willing to kill or even better, to annihilate humans that they consider "other".

Today some of us have extended the life mandate to include other groups, other cultures, and other nations. Some of us even go so far as to include non-human species, especially if they are cute or cuddly or justify jobs studying their habitat to be sure that a new building doesn't endanger the poor dears.

My guess is if the messy ever hits the fan. a lot of this will go away fast.

Ha

a study of tribal societies (which includes biker/street gangs) can be a window into our own primal nature - my thinking is that one source of stress in life is deviating from this standard - so we go camping and form quasi tribes to replace what we have lost - my term for this is anthropological correctness (which in this instance, is a good thing)

to accumulate capital, we have to do a lot of non-athropological things, and stomp most of our primal urges - once we are independent - we need to return to feeding these hungers, carefully

your "other" comment points to the anthropological concept of "kin", and how our DNA views kin and non-kin. My problem is that anything that can be captured is viewed as kin in our household...so there is a lot of running around catching ants and releasing them to the wild.

yes, all this sensitivity goes away when you are mugged by reality -

 

[Kroeran]

Kind of reminds me of the current Stephen Hawking controversy (nothing new as it pops up every so often):

Scientists weigh in on Hawking's alien warning



(If interested, the complete list of commentaries is found at Journal of Cosmology.)

yeah, if you are hosting the arrival of another species or race, you are likely the technologically inferior

my theory is that that happened long ago and we are all sort of one big dairy farm. They genetically engineered us to produce some sort of precious chemical in our excrement, and it is harvested through the municipal sanitation sewer system. ; - )

If you don't hear from me again, turns out my guess is correct, and they will come and dispose of me!

remember the movie "conspiracy theory"'

 

[Kroeran]

With all due respect, I believe there is more to life than persuing our own pleasure. Sure we "feel good" when we do things for others and that is pleasurable. But the pleasure is a side benefit, not the goal. For example, sometimes we do things that feel bad because they are right, according to a higher standard. Not all motives or fulfillment are with respect to our own pleasure.
There are a few things that I would give my life for, because they are bigger than I am. There a a lot of books filled with good people making sacrificial acts for the sake of others, or freedom, or morality (the real kind).
I may have taken a deep dive on philosophy here, but you have to stand for something.

a person based in ego sees "sacrifice" in "selfless" action

a person who has shifted their perspective from ego to their higher (God) self sees so-called "selfless" action as intelligent, pleasurable on a deeper level, and actually selfish in the grand scheme of things

this comes out of accepting that somehow, either through evolution or some mysterious way, we are all connected somehow - so in decision making - we need to take this into account, which begins with working toward harmlessness, and ends with helping others as our highest pleasure

of course, what higher service could a man give than to give his life in service to another, and in a way, what higher pleasure could their be

 

[RonBoyd]

remember the movie "conspiracy theory"'

Okay, I failed to express myself properly yet again. What I meant to emphasis was the "principles of evolution would have shaped those beings just as they did life on Earth, selecting for self-preserving behavior" portion of the quote. That, to me, explains the "Us vs Them" mentality that Humans are saddled with. (BTW, in this context "They" = "Principles of Evolution.")

In any event, I am not by any stretch a conspiracy advocate nor concerned about intelligent visitors from other worlds... I don't rule out non-intelligent threats, however. (Oh! I guess we already have that.)

 

[IndependentlyPoor]

If we lived in tribal societies, or even in frontier towns we would understand that family and group survival and propagation into the future is the purpose of life.

If?

Seems to me that our society is still pretty tribal, and I believe that xenophobia is much of an evolutionary aspect of our wired-in behavior as fear of snakes, fear of the dark, or our need to procreate. (or racism or homophobia for that matter, but let's stay away from those hot buttons.)

For example, I am always surprised at the extent to which folks identify with sports teams, using phases like "we trounced them". This has reached absurd levels with college sports.

Forgive me if I have told this anecdote before, but I heard this in one of those mega-corp management training boondoggles and cannot forget it.

Supposedly, a some sociologists wanted to do research on team (or tribe) identification. They staged a fake three day management boondoggle. Several hundred participants spent all day listening to a real seminar about some management fad de jour.

Here is the experiment. They randomly handed out gimme caps at the beginning and required the participants to wear them to every function. Half of the caps were red and half blue. They never referred to the caps in any way.

The first day, folks sat with their friends and the red and blue caps were evenly distributed throughout the auditorium. By the second day a division between red and blue began to appear. By the third day, the two groups were at each other's throats.

Do I need to put on my asbestos underwear now?

 

[REWahoo]

Do I need to put on my asbestos underwear now?

I'm hopeful we can hold off until at least mid-June.

 

[Kroeran]

Okay, I failed to express myself properly yet again. What I meant to emphasis was the "principles of evolution would have shaped those beings just as they did life on Earth, selecting for self-preserving behavior" portion of the quote. That, to me, explains the "Us vs Them" mentality that Humans are saddled with. (BTW, in this context "They" = "Principles of Evolution.")

In any event, I am not by any stretch a conspiracy advocate nor concerned about intelligent visitors from other worlds... I don't rule out non-intelligent threats, however. (Oh! I guess we already have that.)

sorry if I am not tracking your logic

I just think the us vs them thing is a very cool concept, and it turns on who you perceive to be the "other", as you have stated

I think a big part of the red/blue divide sources in different perceptions of who is "the other"