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06-24-2022, 06:07 AM
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#41
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Full time employment: Posting here.
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 838
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"Phase 2 - you feel loss and feel lost" - I totally skipped this phase!
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06-24-2022, 07:00 AM
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#42
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Recycles dryer sheets
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 490
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As I consider these stages (and yes, of course, these are simply derived from interviews and observations of his...there's never a straight line in these things), it's clear to me that a major part of having gotten stuck in Phase 2 has very little to do about missing my previous work and about 99% due to some extraordinarily challenging issues outside of my control hitting about the same time as retirement time came.
I'm thinking I'll throw us both a new retirement party and just start over...I'd always imagined I'd be in vacation mode for AT LEAST a year, ha!
And while I know his stages don't resonate or appeal to everyone, I think his framework could be helpful for those not retired yet to consider and be aware of. Not everyone is "out of the gate" euphoric after retiring and there's nothing abnormal or wrong with you if you aren't. It just is what it is. NBD.
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06-24-2022, 07:07 AM
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#43
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Jan 2017
Posts: 2,643
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I think phase 2 is highly variable.
I always had interests outside of work, so it wasn't a huge loss to give up that one part of my identity. I think these types of cautionary tales are directed toward those whose whole identity is tied to their work. The 80-hour-week folks.
For me, it was hard leaving my "real" life to spend 40 hours in the office each week. Stopping that was not a problem.
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06-24-2022, 07:29 AM
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#44
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Recycles dryer sheets
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 490
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CaptTom
For me, it was hard leaving my "real" life to spend 40 hours in the office each week. Stopping that was not a problem.
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I understand and agree. Both DH and I have many hobbies and I can't say either of us ever really gets bored b/c there's always something else to do. I'd say for both of us, the challenge has been dealing with unforeseen circumstances out of our control that, nevertheless, have had to be dealt with.
Now that I'm thinking about it, crawling out of those circumstances for us is probably the equivalent of walking away from work for a lot of folks. So, yep, I see a party in our near future!!!
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06-24-2022, 08:56 AM
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#45
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 1,537
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^This. Those labels are ridiculous
__________________
-Big Dawg-FI since 9/2010. Failed ER in 2015. 2/15/2023=DONE! "Blow that dough"-Robbie
" People say I'm lazy, dreaming my life away Well, they give me all kinds of advice designed to enlighten me When I tell them that I'm doing fine watching shadows on the wall "Don't you miss the big time, boy. You're no longer on the ball" -John Lennon-
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06-24-2022, 09:19 AM
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#46
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 5,803
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I don't know what phase I am in. all I know is I am enjoying every day, doing what ever I wish, even if it is nothing. Nothing is doing something :-)
Life is pretty darn good right now.
__________________
Give a Man a fish, he will eat for a day.
Teach a Man to fish, he will eat for a lifetime.
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06-24-2022, 09:29 AM
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#47
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Leeward Oahu
Posts: 17,794
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pacergal
I don't know what phase I am in. all I know is I am enjoying every day, doing what ever I wish, even if it is nothing. Nothing is doing something :-)
Life is pretty darn good right now.
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Good point. Even as we age, we want to live longer. Life is precious.
__________________
Ko'olau's Law -
Anything which can be used can be misused. Anything which can be misused will be.
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06-24-2022, 11:15 AM
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#48
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Pacific latitude 20/49
Posts: 7,677
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After 22 years, I have no need to share my secrets with others. Let them discover it themselves. The only phase shift was to BTD two years ago. Now deadline scheduling. Planning for another 10 years. And having difficulty making up for lost pandemic time in our travel.
Just got a new cat so we are committed to another 16 years to look after her (2 years old now). If she lives to be 20-22, may have to leave her to someone else along with a $25k stipend.
__________________
For the fun of it...Keith
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06-24-2022, 11:58 AM
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#49
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 35,712
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Never thought about phases of retirement.
But looking at the list, I think I do these 3 things concurrently, starting back from the time I worked part-time contracting jobs and did it for 9 years before quitting for good.
Phase 1 - Vacation phase
Phase 2 - you feel loss and feel lost
Phase 3 - a time of trial and error, trying out new things
Phase 4 - a time to reinvent and rewire
__________________
"Old age is the most unexpected of all things that happen to a man" -- Leon Trotsky (1879-1940)
"Those Who Can Make You Believe Absurdities Can Make You Commit Atrocities" - Voltaire (1694-1778)
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06-24-2022, 12:29 PM
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#50
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 6,129
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I wonder if age is a factor in these "phases", particularly Phase 2.
I can envision someone who FIREs in their early 40's to me much more susceptible that those FIREing at, say, 55-60.
In your early 40s, very little of your peer age group is FIRE-ing, and IMHO it is more likely to feel the peer pressure of "do something with your life". It is also more likely to get "bored" with leisure things ("do I really want to be doing this for the next 40 years??")
On the other hand, after 55, one may see enough of one's peer group also retiring, and focused on the leisure side, so one is less likely to feel that pressure. Also, one can more readily recognize that the odds are more likely that they have a max of another 15-20 years at their current health and activity level to experience things, so that becomes the priority.
__________________
FIREd date: June 26, 2018 - "This Happy Feeling, Going Round and Round!" (GQ)
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06-24-2022, 01:16 PM
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#51
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Jun 2017
Location: Western NC
Posts: 4,610
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Hmmm...left the corporate world to be caregiver to mom in my 30s...too busy to be in any 'phase' for the next 15 years...after that focused on getting the kids out of the house...youngest just graduated, so who knows what's next?
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06-24-2022, 02:13 PM
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#52
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 1,019
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I think the reason that the phase thing doesn't resonate with many of us (myself included) is that the video is about phases of retirement rather than phases of FIRE retirement. We're wired differently from most retirees, and are not the target audience.
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06-24-2022, 02:19 PM
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#53
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Recycles dryer sheets
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 490
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Which Roger
I think the reason that the phase thing doesn't resonate with many of us (myself included) is that the video is about phases of retirement rather than phases of FIRE retirement. We're wired differently from most retirees, and are not the target audience.
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That would make sense.
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06-24-2022, 02:32 PM
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#54
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Twin Cities
Posts: 3,927
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The speaker was a “Dr.” and, if he was a physician, I can imagine retiring was a big deal to him, since that profession is all-consuming of one’s public identity, provides constant feel-goods from helping others, and generates a high income. It’s a lot to walk away from, I bet.
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06-24-2022, 02:51 PM
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#55
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Moderator
Join Date: Nov 2015
Posts: 13,879
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Markola
The speaker was a “Dr.” and, if he was a physician, I can imagine retiring was a big deal to him, since that profession is all-consuming of one’s public identity, provides constant feel-goods from helping others, and generates a high income. It’s a lot to walk away from, I bet.
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Nah, he's a Dr via education, not an MD.
Has a background in public speaking and podcasts, and, of course, financial advising. This "4 phases" thing is his main gig...books and workshops!
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06-24-2022, 02:54 PM
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#56
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Recycles dryer sheets
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 490
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The speaker is an educator, now consultant apparently. I think once a teacher, always a teacher. He seems to enjoy what he is doing now and I guess that's a trajectory that most of us would shoot for.
His talk will land on each retiree differently I suppose.
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06-24-2022, 08:30 PM
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#57
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Leeward Oahu
Posts: 17,794
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I'm betting this is a good gig for the Doc.
__________________
Ko'olau's Law -
Anything which can be used can be misused. Anything which can be misused will be.
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06-24-2022, 08:39 PM
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#58
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Central MS/Orange Beach, AL
Posts: 9,067
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Same only 15 years in for me. Certainly never felt lost. Ha
__________________
Retired 3/31/2007@52
Investing style: Full time wuss.
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06-24-2022, 09:01 PM
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#59
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Recycles dryer sheets
Join Date: Aug 2018
Posts: 64
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My Hero
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06-24-2022, 10:13 PM
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#60
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Kansas City
Posts: 7,968
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