How Expensive Are Kids?

[tryan]

My SIL will easily hit the 500k mark with thier "gifted" child. Enrolled the tyke in a private high school (cha-ching: 33k/yr tuition ... THEN add travel and living expenses) and are now looking at ivy league colleges.

Just the educational experience will push ~300k.

 

[madsquopper]

They would have done better to have had a dumbass who could kick the hell out of a football

Larry

 

[MuirWannabe]

They would have done better to have had a dumbass who could kick the hell out of a football

Larry

That is awesome!

 

[Katsmeow]

My SIL will easily hit the 500k mark with thier "gifted" child.

You put gifted in quotes but yes this is something that can result in a child being more expensive to raise. Average kids who aren't particularly academically gifted or who don't have a special awesome talent and who have no disabilities are on average cheaper to raise.

I have one son who is both academically gifted (he will graduate high school at 15) and who has had some areas of special need (hence he attended a therapeutic school for a few years). Our costs in raising him are much, much greater than for our children who are bright but more typical.

Some public schools have no programs for gifted children whatsoever. The kid who can do long division can be required to sit in the classroom while the rest of the class is learning single digit multiplication.

Some public schools have gifted programs but, again, they tend to be for the kids who are "pleasantly" gifted. That is, the kids who are academically advanced but are not real outliers. Let me put it this way. In many public school gifted programs they aim for kids to take calculus in 12th grade, maybe 11th grade for a very few. My son took calculus when he was 13. That kind of thing is very, very difficult for a public school to accomodate. For many parents, they find that the best solution is either a private school or homeschooling (we did both at various times).

But...to make the point for this thread...some kids have needs that are outside the norm and result in higher expenses and so when those expenses don't exist, the parent's expenses may go down considerably.

 

[Milton]

I was under the impression - could be wrong - that there were scholarships available to enable truely gifted children to afford the cost of attending both private schools and universities.

 

[growing_older]

If there are such scholarship programs I was not able to find them, and my child also completed BC Calculus at 13, then had to go to local college for math classes. Financial assistance was available based on need, but as a lbym family we never qualified.

 

[tryan]

Don't know the definition of "gifted" ... it's SIL word, not mine. She's a great well rounded kid. She'll do well in whatever she chooses. Where ever she chooses to do it.

The parents are betting a ton of dough on her success. But what is "success"? What if she wants to be a stay at home mom at the end of this "process" (not that there's anything wrong with that)?

And where is the "balance" in spending 300k on one and squat-zippo on the other(s)?

Could never ask this of SIL ... she's too busy working to pay for all this.

 

[Milton]

If there are such scholarship programs I was not able to find them.

Well, this Canadian site provides a list: Private School Scholarships. There are similar opportunities in the USA, too (the National Association of Independent Schools website indicates that 300 of its members offer Merit-Based Awards).

How To Get Private School Scholarships doesn't provide specific information, but should be of general interest.

Good luck.

 

[RonBoyd]

Well, this Canadian site provides a list: Private School Scholarships. There are similar opportunities in the USA, too (the National Association of Independent Schools website indicates that 300 of its members offer Merit-Based Awards).

How To Get Private School Scholarships doesn't provide specific information, but should be of general interest.

Another example of why this Forum is so valuable.

 

[Katsmeow]

I was under the impression - could be wrong - that there were scholarships available to enable truely gifted children to afford the cost of attending both private schools and universities.

Much less so than you might expect. At the below college level, I do know some schools for gifted kids that provide some scholarship money but they are need based. That is, the child must be both gifted and have a financial need.

 

[Katsmeow]

The parents are betting a ton of dough on her success. But what is "success"? What if she wants to be a stay at home mom at the end of this "process" (not that there's anything wrong with that)?

And where is the "balance" in spending 300k on one and squat-zippo on the other(s)?

Well, I have three thoughts on this. First, I think it places a huge burden on a child - even one who is extremely gifted - to be expected to be a huge success and to feel like he or she must do great things. It bothers my son will people say those sorts of things to him. He wants to have a nice life and have some success but doesn't feel that he has an obligation to do great things.

Second, some kids are just more academically inclined than others. I've known some moderately gifted kids who were very well rounded, enjoyed school, engaged in many school related competitions, enjoyed the competitive atmosphere in attaining admission to highly competitive schools. These kids can be extremely successful.

I did not have one of these kids. My son is extremely gifted in some areas, is not particularly well rounded, and has little to no interest in grades. He does think he needs to get an education so he can earn a reasonable living, he is curious about a lot of things, he does learn extremely quickly. But...he has zero interest in doing the things to go to a competitive university. He just doesn't want to do them. He wants to learn what he wants to learn but doesn't care if it earns him an A or B. So spending money to try to send him to a highly competitive university is a waste of time. It isn't what he wants to do.

Third, I have spent more for school on one child than others because he has had needs that require it. My other children receive a good education that is right for them but comes at a lower cost. OTOH, there are some areas where I've spent more on the other children for their needs.

 

[Milton]

At the below college level, I do know some schools for gifted kids that provide some scholarship money but they are need based. That is, the child must be both gifted and have a financial need.

Needs-based grants are certainly more common than pure merit-based scholarships, but the latter do exist. The NAIS would be able to provide you with a list of scholarships available in your area.

My son ... has zero interest in doing the things to go to a competitive university. He just doesn't want to do them. He wants to learn what he wants to learn but doesn't care if it earns him an A or B. So spending money to try to send him to a highly competitive university is a waste of time. It isn't what he wants to do.

I agree; it would be a complete waste of money.